Dealing with stress//anxiety//depression

[Kevin Peña]

Hey everybody, I decided to start this thread because I remember how much it hurt to be depressed//suicidal in the past. The aim of this discussion is to just put up ways you deal with stress//anxiety//depression of any kind so that anyone who feels down and happens to read this thread can perhaps find a way to feel better about themselves or their lives.  Simple enough.

As for myself, I am an advocate of crying. I make it a habit to try to cry every night before bed. Now before anyone puts me on a suicide watch, let me explain that I TRY to cry every night. If I find something that happened on a particular day makes me sad enough to want to cry, I store my feeling until bedtime and let them out then. This way, the problem is neutralized as quickly as possible and doesn't fester into a huge issue. I just find that it's much easier to deal with a lot of tiny problems than have to beat down one huge problem.

Also, I listen to spunky music and just dance like no one's watching (it also helps if no one is actually watching). I find that having any sort of fun, even if by myself, can be an enormous relief of stress.

Next, if you have the time for it, you can try to take 15 minutes out of your day to simply lay down, close your eyes, and relax. Don't try to think too much. You don't have to sleep, but just cool your jets so that you can relieve some pressure. You can listen to soft music while doing this or not. Do whatever you want, it's dealer's choice.

I also just scream as loudly as I can (preferably when no one is around). I know it sounds silly, but I find that it works, even if only because I sometimes laugh because I feel stupid doing it.

Plus, exercise has many stress-releasing benefits, especially if intense. (I like outdoor bike rides. The intensity and view give me some peace.)

Now it's your turn. Anything goes, so don't be shy. 

And now... some spunky music.

[Felix]

I'm not able to cry on purpose (and also not good at stifling tears when they're there) but I am a huge advocate of making some time to do nothing every day. I've experimented with meditation and yoga but even just chilling out and devoting a few minutes to stillness can make a world of difference.

I frequently want to die (pre-existing obligations prevent this being an option) and I'm in a lot of physical pain, but I try to be silly and dance as often as possible. My roommate is snarky and cynical, and my daughter is hostile and dismissive, so when I play music that makes me happy I have to be very careful not to let them hear it because their comments will kill the joy. I'm working on becoming thick-skinned enough to ignore other people's judgement.

I can keep from getting into or pull out of black holes and wallowing in other ways. When I do pushups or sit ups or repetitions with free weights I often end up feeling much much better about myself and the world. Having an audience for that isn't great but isn't as bad as with songs and dancing.

When things are horribly, irreparably bad I sometimes stop trying to feel better and just focus on making actual changes. I figure I'm miserable anyway so might as well do the dishes or clean the bathroom, or get some paperwork done. I do things that I don't enjoy, and then having them done is a little uplifting.

Cooking is really good for depression. When I'm apathetic and it seems pointless to even get out of bed, sometimes I force myself to get out the ingredients and follow a recipe. I don't necessarily have to think or be creative, and it might take four times as long as when I'm happy, but I get something made that I might enjoy later. It keeps me active and at least salvages the time I spend being miserable.

My lifeline when it feels serious is to find something to laugh about. That can be difficult, and is different for everybody. I like to play online episodes of the colbert report or snl, and back when I had friends there was usually a certain person or two who could always make me laugh.

I look forward to more ideas. I hope this thread takes off.

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

I usually will try to get into a movie  to allow myself to get lost in it.

Certain music can help too.  Upbeat.  Something I can relate to.

[MadelineB]

I sing. Words in the form of poetry, and sound in the form of music, have powerful effects on me and my  emotional innards. Combine them in that song thing, and make me a part of it, and I am somewhere else, but not alone, and my feelings can be poured into the song. Good stuff.

[Padma]

Singing - especially close harmonies with others. Drumming. Dancing in the privacy of my own room (good for fitness and body image too, but mainly for the sense of flow and play it gives me).

[Christine]

 First off, I realize I am probably out of touch with pop culture but I listen to Julie Andrews.  She never fails to lift my spirits or at least distract negative thought patterns. Such a beautiful classy woman. And the most beautiful voice I have ever heard.   I find crying is a great stress reliever and helps to shake off negative feelings.

I also smile. I have found its hard to keep being negative or sad when I am smiling. The smiling either lifts my spirits by itself or the act of smiling combined with negative thoughts and feelings is so odd that I start realizing how dumb it is and I start to chuckle to myself. Hard to explain. I am a little weird I guess.  Petting our dogs almost always makes me feel better. Such beautiful innocent creatures wanting only love and of course dinner.  I also remember the good times with loved ones now gone and those still with us. That sometimes makes me cry in a good way.

Smiling is a powerful and under appreciated tool in a humans. It can diffuse situations, distract, communicate feelings, express love and It can make you and those around you feel good.

[Shang]

I grab a blanket and pillow to take out to the living room.  I then grab a couple of sodas, lay down, and turn on the television before snuggling up on the couch with my dog.  Sometimes I'll exercise, but exercising makes me a bit cranky so it's not all of the time that I do it.  I may also put on as much K-Pop as I can or bawl my eyes out because I cry when depressed or very stressed out.