Are you fed up with verbal insults in public?

[Isabelle]

That's much better, thank you

[Nina Podolskaya]

you're welcome

[Seyranna]

What I'm gonna say will probably be considered a mean cis-supremacist comment but in all honestly if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring? This is an honest question please don't be angry at me.

[Brooke777]

What I'm gonna say will probably be considered a mean cis-supremacist comment but in all honestly if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring? This is an honest question please don't be angry at me.

For me, I would much rather live as a masculine looking woman, then a woman in a man's body. I would rather suffer through insults than suffer with being trapped. Just my opinion.

[twit]

What I'm gonna say will probably be considered a mean cis-supremacist comment but in all honestly if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring? This is an honest question please don't be angry at me.

If their dysphoria is severe enough, I imagine they will learn to deal with it. And besides, no one knows how passable they will become with time.  I never thought I would be able to, but for the most part, so long as its sort of dark, I do ok with vision impaired people. Either way, I think the op has likely gone over this in their heads enough and probably don't need it hashed out so much on here.

[Snowpaw]

What I'm gonna say will probably be considered a mean cis-supremacist comment but in all honestly if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring? This is an honest question please don't be angry at me.

Honestly I don't understand your response enough for it to be offensive. I think though you are responding with another one of those "why bother if you won't pass" spiels. My response to that is this, why should one give up over that? There are a bevy of ways to pass, confidence being one of the biggest ones. There are plenty of masculine women out there. Hell I go out full fem minus the makeup and this 6'2 girl passes all the time now. Here's the secret. Confidence. Something I honestly don't understand why so many here want to tear down in others.

[suzifrommd]

What I'm gonna say will probably be considered a mean cis-supremacist comment but in all honestly if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring? This is an honest question please don't be angry at me.

I know a number of trans women who will never pass, yet daily they celebrate their opportunity to live while expressing their true gender. Too early to tell, but I may end up being one of these. To me, that would still be preferable to being seen by everyone as a cis male.

[Isabelle]

if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring?

I don't know but I'm guessing, even if someone is totally unpassable, they find the discomfort from their dysphoria to be lessened when they feel they are presenting as female, regardless of how they're perceived. For those whom the opposite to is true, again just guessing, I imagine they detransition, one way or another.

[Jayne]

When I was waiting at the council today I had a woman sat either side, I wasn't presenting as female but I had my bright pink nail varnish on.
The woman on my right saw it & moved about 5 seats away! The one on my left didn't have another seat to move to so she shuffled across her seat to get as far away as possible, by the time I was called she was almost falling off her seat.
This woman & her friend were speaking in a language i'm not familiar with but they seemed oblivious to their universal body language, here's a tip, regardless of what language you speak if you & your friend point at someone when you think they're not looking & giggle or laugh at them then congratulations, you've just broken through the language barrier you ignorant *******

Edited to remove swearing, sorry

[Jayne]

What I'm gonna say will probably be considered a mean cis-supremacist comment but in all honestly if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring? This is an honest question please don't be angry at me.

For all but the most fortunate people we all have to go through a very difficult transition stage, do you wait until you're getting looks or abuse for being a feminine man or do you put up with looks & insults for being a butch woman who's unfortunate to have certain male features?
If passing is a requirement of being female then i know several women who should be forced to transition to being men.
To find people on a forum such as this saying that people should give up if the going gets hard is gob smacking, people come here for support not to be made to feel worse about themselves

[Isabelle]

To find people on a forum such as this saying that people should give up if the going gets hard is gob smacking

She never said anything of the sort. She asked a simple question about the nature of other peoples dysphoria. jeeze lady, cool your jets.

(also.. calling people bitches in a (public) thread about how bad public insults are, is as hilarious as it is ironic )

[Snowpaw]

When I was waiting at the council today I had a woman sat either side, I wasn't presenting as female but I had my bright pink nail varnish on.
The woman on my right saw it & moved about 5 seats away! The one on my left didn't have another seat to move to so she shuffled across her seat to get as far away as possible, by the time I was called she was almost falling off her seat.
This woman & her friend were speaking in a language i'm not familiar with but they seemed oblivious to their universal body language, here's a tip, regardless of what language you speak if you & your friend point at someone when you think they're not looking & giggle or laugh at them then congratulations, you've just broken through the language barrier you ignorant bitches

*hugs* sorry you had to deal with that, some people are just totally mean.

[Jayne]

She never said anything of the sort. She asked a simple question about the nature of other peoples dysphoria. jeeze lady, cool your jets.

(also.. calling people ******* in a (public) thread about how bad public insults are, is as hilarious as it is ironic )

How is saying that I consider these 2 women ******* hilarious? please enlighten me what's so funny about this?
You'll have to excuse me if i'm not full of the joys of spring but after waiting for about half an hour having to try to ignore this despicible behaviour whilst fighting back the tears i'm hardly going to be full of praise for these people.
I've lost my home due to recieving threats about being trans, my belongings have been stolen, the police won't take action & i've been made redundant in the space of 2 months so my tolerance levels for people like this is close to zero right now, the person I saw today strongly recommended that I seek medical attention because of my emotional state.
I'm right at the end of my rope right now & find someone saying my intolerance of this intolerance is hilarious is beyond insulting.

[Isabelle]

How is saying that I consider these 2 women bitches hilarious? please enlighten me what's so funny about this?

I didnt say it is hilarious, I said it is as hilarious as it is ironic. If you cant see the irony then, for the same reason, you wont see the humour. I'm sorry you've had a tough time. I really am. I didn't mean to offend you.

[pretty]

What I'm gonna say will probably be considered a mean cis-supremacist comment but in all honestly if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring? This is an honest question please don't be angry at me.

I don't understand either, that sounds very terrible. 

[kelly_aus]

Honestly I don't understand your response enough for it to be offensive. I think though you are responding with another one of those "why bother if you won't pass" spiels. My response to that is this, why should one give up over that? There are a bevy of ways to pass, confidence being one of the biggest ones. There are plenty of masculine women out there. Hell I go out full fem minus the makeup and this 6'2 girl passes all the time now. Here's the secret. Confidence. Something I honestly don't understand why so many here want to tear down in others.

I'll second the confidence idea. I believe myself to be less than physically passable, but I pass. And the only reason I can find for this is that I am confident - 100% confident in my identity as a woman.

[judithlynn]

Luckily in the periods I transitioned I have only had two incidents at being "outed" in public. Both in the United Kingdom. One was in Exeter crossing the street on a pelican crossing on route to my beautician and the second time in Oxford Street.

I think the first was the worse. As I was crossing the road, I got caught in a huge gust of wind, there were two young men in a car stopped at the crossing to let me cross, and I started over in my heels in a green shirt dress and leggings (I think I was en route for a full leg and bikini leg wag and IPL on my back) so comfortably dressed for the session, anyway back to the story, the wind caught me in the face and lifted my wig off my head. It was  tres tres (as the French say) embarrassing. I actually cried with embarrassment. The boys shouted, hooted their horns etc. Just Gross!!. Luclkily my beautician was right opposite the crossing and I dashed in, the girls were very good when I explained what happened. My therapist gave me a kiss on the cheek telling me I looked wonderful and gave me a cup of tea..

The second time was I was waiting at a bus stop outside Selfridges in Oxford Street. I had just had a wonderful make over by a Beauty Saleswoman at the Dior Cosmetics counter in Selfridges and felt a million dollars. Sheer pantiie hose, pink open toe 3.5" heels and a floral A line dress with me with bare shoulders and arms. I felt a million dollars. Anyway I was waiting fr a bus back to Tower Hamlets as I was up in London meeting friends that night in the Way Out Club and standing at the bus stop, this scruffy rumanian/gypsy boy was begging at the stop. Something about me twigged and he started shouting this is a man, this a man at the top of his voice,

I turned said to him you silly boy, look I have no adam apple pointing at my throat and made a bee line for Bond Street Tube station as quick as I could get across the road. What relief to be lost in the crowd. Oh I remember one thing, my feet hurt like hell from those heels. I should have worn my wedges that day.

[peky]

What I'm gonna say will probably be considered a mean cis-supremacist comment but in all honestly if you know for a fact that you will never really pass for a woman, never be treated as such and always suffer deeply from it how can dysphoria, however severe ever be considered worst than the life of suffering and misery transition will bring? This is an honest question please don't be angry at me.

in your dreams!

Even at my advance age I am more beautiful, and attract  a lot of attention from the male folks, than 80% of the so called cis-females I encounter on my daily live.

Speak for yourself dahrling

[peky]

You know we are more than just trans or cis, gender is but one component of who we are.

In my male role -I had to play- I was an alpha dog, now, true to myself,  I am an alpha bitch, that is. Nothing  has changed! 

[Kevin Peña]

I think the first was the worse. As I was crossing the road, I got caught in a huge gust of wind, there were two young men in a car stopped at the crossing to let me cross, and I started over in my heels in a green shirt dress and leggings (I think I was en route for a full leg and bikini leg wag and IPL on my back) so comfortably dressed for the session, anyway back to the story, the wind caught me in the face and lifted my wig off my head. It was  tres tres (as the French say) embarrassing. I actually cried with embarrassment. The boys shouted, hooted their horns etc. Just Gross!!. Luclkily my beautician was right opposite the crossing and I dashed in, the girls were very good when I explained what happened. My therapist gave me a kiss on the cheek telling me I looked wonderful and gave me a cup of tea..

If that ever happened to me, I would probably laugh hysterically.