What would you do in my situation?

[JJ]

Deleted

[suzifrommd]

No question for me. I'd choose:

1) Transition anyway and to hell with what other people think.

You have a right to live in such a way that is true to who you are. Any decent person will accept you that way.

I'm 51, balding, and it's not clear I'll ever pass. It doesn't matter. I need to be true to who I am.

[Jamie D]

JJ - you are the one with chronic fatigue syndrome, right?  Any improvement, or hope for an adequate treatment?

[pretty]

Well to be completely honest in your situation I would probably just try to live as a gay feminine male and pour all of my energy into my other passions.

That is just me though. I can't say to hell with what other people think because I am transitioning so that I can exist inwardly and outwardly as a woman... if everybody just knew me as a trans person it wouldn't make me feel good... actually it would make me feel terrible.

Well like, to give an example, I love to sing and if I were born a cis girl I would probably really want to pursue singing and it would really make me happy to give it my all and to sing prettily... but with the lowered voice I was forced to have, becoming seriously involved in singing things would just bring me too much sadness because I would always be focusing on how unfair it is that I have to struggle so hard just to sing in a range that most other girls would have no problems with. I don't think I could get over that... being in-between. It would have none of the pleasure of being how I wanted to be. So anyway I just sing for fun by myself and with close friends/family and tell myself that it keeps me more sane to focus on things I can actually experience to the fullest, even if it makes a part of me sad.

I don't know  I'm sorry OP, again that is just what I personally would do, not saying anyone else should have to.

[Sarah Louise]

Our choices might not be your choice.  We all do what we need to do to continue living.

For me it was to transition.  My looks are what they are, I'll never be voted beauty queen of anything, but that was never important to me.  I don't ask other people how they see me, and none have been rude or abusive to me, they know how I see myself so they treat me as who I am.

It is you who need to be commited to accepting yourself and your presentation.  Don't let others limit your happiness.  If you want to live as a woman, do it.  If you can live with yourself as male so much the better.  But its your life and your happiness.

[Brooke777]

JJ- Sorry for you situation. Honestly, this is something I had to think about when I was trying to get onto hrt. There was a large possibility that I would not be allowed on them. For me, a workable solution was to try and appear andro. At least then people would not know if I was male or female. It took me quite a while to come to that conlusion.

I hope you are able to find a place where you can be happy with yourself. That is the most important thing.  Good luck.