Uplifting Compliments (or similar stories)

[Taka]

Time for some positivism.
Tell us about compliments you've gotten from people or that were said in a way which just made you seriously happy to hear it. It may be anything, doesn't even have to do with your gender.


i'll start with myself. just a few minutes ago i had a talk with my dad. a dad whom i don't really get along with, since he has a tendency to see too much of my mother's views and opinions in every single thing that i say. but today he gave me the best compliment that anyone could have given me: he said that he sees a lot of my late grandfather in me. i can't remember ever having met my (paternal) grandfather, but what i've heard about him from people who knew him is that he was the best father anyone could hope to have. a man who never criticized, raised his voice, or spoke ill of others. my dad told me that the worst thing he's ever heard him say about another person is that he's "not too fond of that guy". and that's just the kind of person i hope to be, so i was very touched to hear that i at least have some traits of his.

and another one that i got from my (maternal) uncle. i met him at my brother's wedding last year, wearing male wear, though not binding or anything. and he said that's the most he's ever seen me look like myself. it gave me confirmation that i'm on the right track when thinking i'm not really cis female.



(uhh.... i might have posted this in the wrong section, kinda forgot how vast this forum is. but even so, i think it belongs here, since some of the best compliments we get are confirming our gender, or our value despite being tg. or however i'm supposed to say it)

[Laura Emily]

I've been asked on several occasions while attending the hospital if I was pregnant lol

[eli77]

When I told my best friend I was scared about moving cities and trying to start my life now that transition is basically mostly finished and whether things would work out and whether I'd get overwhelmed and screwed up and things would get bad again like they were before, he just looked at me for a second and said, "But that's crazy. Like that's obviously not rational. You are a totally different person now. That isn't going to happen." I just was like... man, I love you so much right now.

[Padma]

Last weekend, when I was away on a singing weekend, I was really struggling with my overwhelmed teenage state of mind. A couple of times, people I didn't know that well asked me how I was, and I was actually honest with them. Both of them independently told me that even under stress, I seem calmer and more friendly than most people around me. It really helped hearing that.

[Edge]

I went to see my school counsellor last week because the stress was piling up and it was affecting my ability to concentrate. After talking for awhile, he told me I am very strong.
My mom gave me some advice for sewing a costume without telling me that it would be too difficult. I don't like my mom much, but it's still nice to have someone show that they know difficulty isn't going to stop me.

[aleon515]

I had lunch with my best friend last weekend. I was telling her about someone who is having nothign to do with me because I am trans and another who just acted weird about it. She said, well in all the ways that *really* matter I haven't really changed like values and morality and care about others and so on. I said well of course I talk and think a lot about this, and she said well of course it IS a big thing. This was such a great thing for a best friend to say-- why she's my best friend.


--Jay J

[RedFox]

Around this time last year I was at a tim hortons (like american dunkin donuts) at like 4 am, drunk, and trying to stay up straight in line to order some donuts. I had already come out but I was not yet on hormones, but I still acted flamboyant and still went to the bar that night with eyeliner, mascara, and painted nails. A lady in front of me out of the blue said thanks. I asked her for what? She said "we need people like you so society can advance." That stuck with me for a while.

That's great!  Not the drunk at 4 am part, but the ladies comment.  It takes people willing to stand up for the right to be themselves to push the society to change for the better.

[Kelly J. P.]

 I was once instructed to get a pap smear.

I giggled.

[Phoeniks]

Today my friend told me I looked like a pirate
And she also said I'd obviously gained upper-body muscles in the two months we hadn't seen each other.
Yea, this made me feel awesome

[Taka]

i've gotten compliments for my non-conformist hair color. some of the things i've heard were negative like "what does your mother say about that?" or more of the "you've outdone yourself". but a few people called it refreshing, and one guy even said that we need people who dare do something different in our community

i can only hope that they'll be this positive if i.... well, i'll just worry about that later if it happens

[Quinn]

i still get almost awkwardly happy if anyone calls me "he" or uses any kind of male pronoun towards me. my girlfriend thinks it's absolutely hilarious, too XD
one time one of my friends, who originally didn't even know what trans meant when i told her...three months ago, i think, said i looked handsome. which made me kind of want to explode with happiness XD

[wrabbit]

Well I can't be out at work so it causes problems for me when people misgender me just because i'm forced to wear the female uniform.

But I sat at lunch with one of my friends who knew, and I had just met his friend who called me "a beautiful lady" and we said im not a beautiful lady.
she said "then you are a beautiful young woman"
We told her no, she doesn't understand... I'm a boy.
She paused for a bit and then said "Then you are a handsome strapping young lad"

omg those are the best words I've heard come out of someone's mouth 

[Beth Andrea]

I "took in" my ex's pants one day, and went to her work to put them in her mini-van...just after I left, she texted me that one of the nurse's aides came to her and asked about "some woman putting clothes in your van..."

She thought I'd like to know. 

[Taka]

not my story, but a cute one i just heard on tv. it's something like a documentary about a young sami man, and the reporter, when he heard that the guy once saw someone in a pink traditional costume, asks the mother: "if your son wanted a pink costume, would you sew it for him?" and then she just answers "yes, why not?"

i should probably also mention that i've already seen sami men in purple costumes, and pink shirts. i think there might be some modern concepts about gender roles that some of these people don't quite get... very refreshing at times.

[Kaelin]

At church the previous Sunday, I had ~seven people (including a couple/few kids) say they really liked my dress and/or its color.  The weird thing is that when I got it, I had mixed feelings because the color was darker than how it appeared online.

[patstar]

Around this time last year I was at a tim hortons (like american dunkin donuts) at like 4 am, drunk, and trying to stay up straight in line to order some donuts. I had already come out but I was not yet on hormones, but I still acted flamboyant and still went to the bar that night with eyeliner, mascara, and painted nails. A lady in front of me out of the blue said thanks. I asked her for what? She said "we need people like you so society can advance." That stuck with me for a while.

Wow, THAT speaks to me!  And: we need more intelligent and evolved people like this lady with liberated opinions, especially when we are so awash in sexist, racist, religious (etc), and backward minded bigots with misinformed dogmatic mindsets.

Okay, the basic notion with thread is to be positive, so—perhaps this wonderful opinion is a sign of a changing tide and things to come in our society.  We can hope.

[Jayne]

Shantel has seen me in a video, my excema was terrible & i'd not slept the night before so my voice was a mess, I hate looking at the video even though it was helpful for me to see mistakes I was making. I recieved this encouraging response from her "you are just darling with a petite figure"

It really cheered me up, thank you so much for the compliment

Also I saw a GP last week & when my upcoming transition was mentioned she asked if I was MTF or FTM, she couldn't tell which way my journey is going. I take that as positive, i'd not shaved but something about my face is neutral enough to make her uncertain about what i've started with

[FTMDiaries]

I haven't come out at work yet (although the male clothing & the binding should be giving away a few clues)... but in spite of the many dramas going on in my private life, several of my colleagues have commented on how much calmer & more at peace I seem these days. My boss told me a few weeks ago that he's never seen me looking as relaxed as I do now.

I'll eventually tell them exactly why I'm so much more at peace with myself.

[gennee]

Since coming out to my faith community, I have been acepted and affirmed. I also have had opportunities to share with others about transgender topics and issues.

[Taka]

my gp, or more like the new intern at my gp's office... is so sweet. i asked her if she could help refer me to someone who may help me with transgender issues, and she didn't criticize or ask any unpleasant questions at all. she didn't even try to make me explain too much, just enough so she had some understanding of why i needed the kind of expert i asked for, and whether i was prepared to deal with social stigma, or had come out to my family. she also agreed with me that there's no point thinking too much about that before i've gotten to know myself better and know whether i want to transition or anything.

and even better, she gets it, understands that transgender is simply something that one is, and nothing that should be changed (like "correcting" ones mind). her wording wasn't perfect "a girl who feels like she's a boy", but she accepted my correction that it's more like "a boy who looks like a girl".

the world looks so bright when i meet people who aren't judging.