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yay terrible threes

Started by Edge, October 22, 2012, 02:49:12 PM

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Edge

My son has been having a temper tantrum for the last forty five minutes over crackers. FORTY FIVE MINUTES! And most of that was on the bus where, of course, people act like I should be able to put him on mute. He's a toddler, not a tv!
Parenting secret: time outs are as much for the parents as they are for the kid. Deep breaths.
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suzifrommd

Been there.

Was able to console myself with the knowledge that if I set consistent boundaries, my efforts would pay off later.

I was right. My son's 17 now and very well behaved and sensible (even if he does really hate school). Never had a call from any of his teachers with any kind of problem.

Hang in there. You're doing the right thing.

But yes, public tantrums really do suck.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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Brooke777

My son would ususally calm down when I asked him to. On the other hand, he would get louder if his mother asked him to calm down. You gotta love the emotions of a toddler  ;D
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Edge

Thanks.
For Owen, it depends on what the tantrums about. Sometimes, he'll calm down if I ask him (if I remain calm). But for some reason, he can't stand dropping or otherwise losing something.
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Brooke777

My son had his moments as well, still does at age 6. He has a weird thing about getting his hands dirty. When they get dirty, the only way to calm him down is soap and water. Or a lot of hand sanitizer. It's great that you have his triggers figured out. My son's mother still doesn't have my son's triggers figured out.
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JoanneB

Quote from: TessaM on October 22, 2012, 04:09:04 PM
My father would have smacked me. My mother would have out screamed me. I didnt have many public outbursts because of this.
I know I would have gotten the "I'll give something to cry about" line, which meant a good smack. End of tantrum. Just a dull whimper or a "But...." followed by The Look  :o
.          (Pile Driver)  
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                    ^
(ROCK) ---> ME <--- (HARD PLACE)
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Jeatyn

Quote from: Edge on October 22, 2012, 04:25:41 PM
Thanks.
For Owen, it depends on what the tantrums about. Sometimes, he'll calm down if I ask him (if I remain calm). But for some reason, he can't stand dropping or otherwise losing something.

My daughter is the same way! I had to endure a public tantrum the other day because the wind blew her packet of quavers out of her hand and on to the floor just as we were getting on the bus....and not long before that she tripped while holding little box full of grapes and was completely inconsolable about her grapes being on the floor. The grapes incident happened at the bus stop rather than on the bus...so I just walked her to the next bus stop out of sight of the grapes and she calmed down :P The whole time we were walking she kept looking back and sobbing all over again at the grapes. Bless her cottons.
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suzifrommd

Quote from: Edge on October 22, 2012, 04:25:41 PM
But for some reason, he can't stand dropping or otherwise losing something.

The little guy is learning to comfort himself. We feel disappointment acutely as adults, so it's easy to imagine how hard it is to deal with without our reservoir of experience.

However you comfort him, that's how he'll learn to comfort himself. The words and tones you use to him, those will be the words and tones his inner voice will speak to him for the rest of his life.

I prefer soothing empathetic tones, myself - making no attempt to fix the problem, just acknowledging how disappointing and sad it must be. From that he'll learn to recognize his own feelings and not be afraid of them.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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Felix

I had a neighbor come over and threaten to kick my ass one day when my daughter was throwing a fit over not being allowed as many pickles as she wanted. Kids contain astounding amounts of chaos.
everybody's house is haunted
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Edge

Oh yes and last night he had me up all night and I had a midterm this morning. Yeah... I doubt that went well.
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Damian

My parents just simply ignored me until I stopped, course we are hermits though..  ;)
Love has no gender.
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