exhausted......

[Natkat]

okay this is a vent post so your warned:

I am unsure how I should explain this.

currently we are on a limit to get in some rather bad situations
trans people are losing there rights little by little as I thought it was getting better its only getting worse.

we are few activism who been working for the better but as I see it we are too few to make a big efford.
I am rather annoyed cause the reason we are few are not because we dont have enough people, its because many transfolks dont want to deal with activism.
they want us who already do it to deal with it without doing anything themself or also they had got used to the ignorance and belive they dosent deserves better.

I grew under the unspoken: "give and resieve" rule, where you been helped by the comunety and then you help back in a way. but its worries me if we can't get this help for people who dont wanna pay back.

as I look around for those who do something and those who dont, I see some of the active members to be very exhausted. they been demanded to do alot of work but there only humans and simple cant.
I had small chat with people where I had to point it out that "NO, its not like we dont want to help but you cant expect more from us, do it yourself if you want change cause we cant!"

had there been 5 people where there stands 1 the situations would had been diffrent but theres not.

I fear because we are to few people we simple Can't do what it demands for things to get better. I been told not to worry and that people will be active when it start to hit them that there rights are slowly faiding away but I still cant help worry if its then will be too late, that we already had alot of people losing there right, including myself.

yet I cant force anyone to help, can I?
I been wondering if there at least should be a limit of help people could give back when they resive help but its not up to me to deside those kind of things.

I guess i'm just worried cause I feel like my limits are to be reached.
I try to do alot and stay strong but im about to get very exhausted. I also need money and a prober job and to take care of my mother who is sick, she dosent know im an activism and keep complaining how im always tired and lazy, when I get home. she shouldnt know either cause she dosent like me to "expose my sexualety in public".

Someday I just thinking about moving far away,
I been suggesting to go to Berlin or Minnesota, I dont care just somewhere where being trans wouldnt be such a work all the time, and where I could live rather peacefully without worry whatever or not I can get threatment, getting my gendermarked change, or if my friends are to die, or getting exposed in the media.

I just cant because I dont have the money
and because I dont want to be a coward and leave my friends and people I know in this situation.

I am unsure what to do about this,

[insideontheoutside]

I know English isn't your first language Natkat so I'm trying to sort out what exactly you're talking about and hopefully I'm not too far off.

It sounds like where you are there isn't as much help for trans people as in other areas of the world? And that you've tried helping a lot but your limit of how much you can help has been reached? If that's the case, there's probably not a whole lot you can do about it. People might be able to find some form of help on the web if it's just a matter of support, but if it's monetary help and you don't have it to give, it just might not be possible. And you're right, you can't make other people want to get involved with activism. There's many trans people who just want to quietly live their lives and not get involved.

If something is bigger than you and you've done all you can to help/get involved, you just have to realize that's about all you can do and not let it get you down.

[unknown]

Now I fell sad  .

I most admit I'm not really doing much, but I simply don't have the money. I don't think I even have a change of getting a job. It cost's a so much money just to do anything, but I know if I don't do anything I can only blame myself for loosing an important battle. Arghg!

I have my comic, but I doubt they will read that. I have all the time in the world, since I'm skipping school anyway (due to getting this stupid trans 'fame' there). I really want to use that time on something useful. One of the times I was close to loosing me self (not sure if be suicide or what it would be) I swore that I would help trans people. I really want to, but as already said I need money.

If someone knows how to make money please tell.

Natkat if you guys need anything that does not involve moving to the capital I'm listing. I really wish I could do more.

[Natkat]

I know English isn't your first language Natkat so I'm trying to sort out what exactly you're talking about and hopefully I'm not too far off.

It sounds like where you are there isn't as much help for trans people as in other areas of the world? And that you've tried helping a lot but your limit of how much you can help has been reached? If that's the case, there's probably not a whole lot you can do about it. People might be able to find some form of help on the web if it's just a matter of support, but if it's monetary help and you don't have it to give, it just might not be possible. And you're right, you can't make other people want to get involved with activism. There's many trans people who just want to quietly live their lives and not get involved.

If something is bigger than you and you've done all you can to help/get involved, you just have to realize that's about all you can do and not let it get you down.

It's a very complex situation but to try making it simple im from scandinavia and they want to make it illigal to do surgery and homones everywhere unless for 1 place who dont treat you good and only want to help a 1 out of 10 of all the transgenders who need help.

I together with alot of people arnt one of those 1%. im as much as almost 99% ill never become.
Untill now you could find alternatives to private doctors who would give you homones or you could get surgerys, those where not cheap but it worked for many.

but as the new law I wont have those options anymore, My doctor will get into prison for helping me and I cant just go to a country nearby cause there under the same strick rules. so where I used to travel 1 hour - 8 hours for getting threatment, I would now need to travel something between 8 hour-24 hours
(1 way)

I am just very nervous for it all because they already putted 2 doctors down so far.
my friend just came to me today and told me I there where still a doctor I could go to and if I got an apointment now I could buy homones for a period (ex 1-2 years) and then survive the time saving up money and maybe move away if I nothing had got better.

its an option but in genneral I just feel so horrible.

[Natkat]

I know English isn't your first language Natkat so I'm trying to sort out what exactly you're talking about and hopefully I'm not too far off.

It sounds like where you are there isn't as much help for trans people as in other areas of the world? And that you've tried helping a lot but your limit of how much you can help has been reached? If that's the case, there's probably not a whole lot you can do about it. People might be able to find some form of help on the web if it's just a matter of support, but if it's monetary help and you don't have it to give, it just might not be possible. And you're right, you can't make other people want to get involved with activism. There's many trans people who just want to quietly live their lives and not get involved.

no matter if your invold with activism or not you will be involved.
as long you live in the area you will be invold unless your full post up with permission and everything, and honestly I think thats a few. So nobody really gonna live those queit life unless they are lucky or move away.

Now I fell sad  .

I most admit I'm not really doing much, but I simply don't have the money. I don't think I even have a change of getting a job. It cost's a so much money just to do anything, but I know if I don't do anything I can only blame myself for loosing an important battle. Arghg!

I have my comic, but I doubt they will read that. I have all the time in the world, since I'm skipping school anyway (due to getting this stupid trans 'fame' there). I really want to use that time on something useful. One of the times I was close to loosing me self (not sure if be suicide or what it would be) I swore that I would help trans people. I really want to, but as already said I need money.

If someone knows how to make money please tell.

Natkat if you guys need anything that does not involve moving to the capital I'm listing. I really wish I could do more.

I dont have much money myself, all my money are used on activism making food, and stuff like that. I could probably make money for my comics but it would be a risky try now when im not even where where to go.
---
you can collect signatures for free without needing to travel alot.
alot of the things are going on by net.

[unknown]

If they do make those stupid laws (I really hope they don't) would it be possible to move away as a refugee?
I really don't like the idea of illegal hormones, but if they do this I will have no other choice   

And Natkat. I really don't think that it will help, but that's just my personal experience telling me that. I of cause hope we can do something about all of this mess.

[Natkat]

If they do make those stupid laws (I really hope they don't) would it be possible to move away as a refugee?
I really don't like the idea of illegal hormones, but if they do this I will have no other choice   

And Natkat. I really don't think that it will help, but that's just my personal experience telling me that. I of cause hope we can do something about all of this mess.

I'm not sure
tecnically I dont think you'll be label as a refugee when your life isnt in danger,
but you could move away anyway.
well actually some peoples health and life could be strongly infected by this if there sterilizated and neither allowed male or female homones but it all depend on each person.

I dont like illigal homones either, im lucky cause I might have for what could cover half a year and more into the future with help from a friend, there could be alternatives but it depend on how strick the law is and about peoples efford. usunally your bending the rules to its limits finding holes in the system. I bet there will be alternatives like this but I also know they wont be good as it used.
---
what is your personal experience?
if you dont wanna tell its fine.
--
For my personal experience it could help, I been in 3 diffrent caises where we made a diffrence by petitions. Not petitions alone, but they where also a part.

[AdamMLP]

I wish I could offer you some help and advice but I don't know what to suggest.  I just wanted to say that I wish I could help but I'm not from your country, and it makes me really sad/annoyed/helpless/frustrated to see people having to fight for something that should be a human right, especially as the rest of the world doesn't seem to care about the T part of LGBT as long as gay people get to marry.  It's important, but that's just a social matter, this is a healthcare matter and I think that should be more important.

Anyway, if there's anything I can do to help you guys from here in England I will.  If I could get to Denmark (is that where you are?  I've forgotten,) to help out, even for a little while I would.

[Natkat]

I wish I could offer you some help and advice but I don't know what to suggest.  I just wanted to say that I wish I could help but I'm not from your country, and it makes me really sad/annoyed/helpless/frustrated to see people having to fight for something that should be a human right, especially as the rest of the world doesn't seem to care about the T part of LGBT as long as gay people get to marry.  It's important, but that's just a social matter, this is a healthcare matter and I think that should be more important.

Anyway, if there's anything I can do to help you guys from here in England I will.  If I could get to Denmark (is that where you are?  I've forgotten,) to help out, even for a little while I would.

i'm generally from denmark But i'm flexible to visit countrys around nearby.
we had great suport from England with a caise earlyer where I tried to save a girl from being deportated back to her home country which where very unsafe for her. She is still in the country and safe. it's due to help of petitions and demonstrations in denmark, england and spain she was safed in the very last moment.
http://liberalconspiracy.org/2012/09/09/save-fernanda-milan-protest-at-danish-embassy-tomorrow/

so sure it can be helped from outside, currently im not sure what kind of help it will be because everything is new, unclear and im still figuring out whats going on with the law and people.

my current doctor who been giving me homones just got caught to not deal with transgenders anymore, I got 2 contacts to other doctors who havent been caught (at least not yet) and I had found out that even if the worst happent, and I cant get any doctors or any homones, I could still run 3-8 mounths (depending on the situation) because I got some left im my refrigerator.
which make me feel abit safe.

one of the doctors might not be caught easly because his not just a doctor but more of a specialist so they will find it harder to push him down. the bad fact is he dosent give homones to anyone less than 18 but I try to seach for posibilatys for those but in general its always been harder being less than 18, as you have less doctors who will help you and more prejugding by people as well as the trans comunety.
------
Anyway,
Im very happy for you suport, it means alot,
I talked to a friend maybe we would make some world wide petitions when we know alittle more about all these details, you could maybe help for some english translation, (like "my english" to english LOL) even if not you could sign one I hope.

Do you know about rules in England for homones and for people less than 18?
isnt it something about you need a therapist to give you a letter or something?

We also considered to have some people going to a country to buy homones, so we are checking out the rules for the diffrent places in caise this horrible law is going for real or that it just had scared to many doctors to help us.

[unknown]

Well now people under 18 can't get T any more. Also Denmark have now violated human rights and Declaration of Geneva. Good going Denmark.

[AdamMLP]

I think it's a worldwide problem getting hormones and surgery for people under 18, not just in your country.  Doctors and therapists want to cover their own backs so they don't get accused of brainwashing young people or something if the person they give hormones to decides later that it was just a teenage phase.  It doesn't help the people who really need the treatment but I can understand why they don't like doing it very often.

As far as I understand if you're under 18 in Britain you need to be referred to a Gender Identity Clinic after getting assessed by the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service, but a lot of Gender Identity Clinics don't like treating people under 18.  About half of them will see people from 16 and above, although they don't normally give hormones under 18.  There's only one who will see patients under 16 as long as they have parental consent.  They do prescribe hormone blockers for people under 18 though.

I don't know how the private sector works in the UK because that's too expensive for me to consider.

I don't think you can buy hormones in the UK, they have to be gotten by prescription which I think you have to be a British citizen to get.  Someone else might have a better idea about this than me though.  I'm not doing anything about getting hormones until I'm 18 though because of how the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service treated me when I was seeing them for depression so I'm not the best person to ask.

I would be very happy to help with petitions and "translating" your English if you need me to, and would definitely sign them.

Edit: I just finished reading the article you linked me to and saw this:
"The problem for Fernanda is that Denmark, the UK and Ireland opted out of an EU agreement to include persecution on the grounds of gender identity as a criterion for asylum."
Which means that you can't use this as a reason to be treated as a refugee from your country.

[unknown]

That's too bad. We only have one doctor left that is not with the government. If they force him out too, then there is no way that we can't get any treatment. They don't treat trans people that are not heterosexual and are not stereotypical in their 'new' gender (and be over 18).

This means that we are forced to go to different countries to get hormones.

[Natkat]

I think it's a worldwide problem getting hormones and surgery for people under 18, not just in your country.  Doctors and therapists want to cover their own backs so they don't get accused of brainwashing young people or something if the person they give hormones to decides later that it was just a teenage phase.  It doesn't help the people who really need the treatment but I can understand why they don't like doing it very often.

As far as I understand if you're under 18 in Britain you need to be referred to a Gender Identity Clinic after getting assessed by the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service, but a lot of Gender Identity Clinics don't like treating people under 18.  About half of them will see people from 16 and above, although they don't normally give hormones under 18.  There's only one who will see patients under 16 as long as they have parental consent.  They do prescribe hormone blockers for people under 18 though.

I don't know how the private sector works in the UK because that's too expensive for me to consider.

I don't think you can buy hormones in the UK, they have to be gotten by prescription which I think you have to be a British citizen to get.  Someone else might have a better idea about this than me though.  I'm not doing anything about getting hormones until I'm 18 though because of how the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service treated me when I was seeing them for depression so I'm not the best person to ask.

I would be very happy to help with petitions and "translating" your English if you need me to, and would definitely sign them.

Edit: I just finished reading the article you linked me to and saw this:
"The problem for Fernanda is that Denmark, the UK and Ireland opted out of an EU agreement to include persecution on the grounds of gender identity as a criterion for asylum."
Which means that you can't use this as a reason to be treated as a refugee from your country.

Yeah, don't get me wrong, its always been hard being under 18, I just try to see if there is options so it wont get imposible.

the thing you decribe of teens are the same here insteed of it just being teens its all transgenders no matter age and the only place who not scared of brainwashing them are already done enough.
I got my deepest repest for my doctors and also understanding that they dont dare to take a risk. Its just unfair it has to be so in the first place.
--
being a citizin we would could find someone from UK who already had a prescrition, we got 2 from wales and 1 from UK as I know, but the system seam rather difficult so I bet the focus would be on German and Spain then.
also I really dont like gender clinics. I been thinking of going to the gender clinic in sweden as it been said to be alot better but I still have this big phobia for those kind of places like what if they dont think im trans and rejejct me? should I lie or tell the trust? I told the trust 100% in denmark and it was so far my biggest mistake as nobody really get permission unless they lie alittle. it should be better in sweden but I still find it hard to trust people.

well denmark do has alot of human rights stuff about transgenders they should follow, but they just simple ignore it and push it to the side I think they only follow 4 of the 10-11 rules they should about transgenders.
with fernanda caise however the law have been changed since so before where it was that you could get protection status, you can now get refugee status for gender identety. its rather new like it got out for a week or 2 maybe.
-

[Natkat]

Well now people under 18 can't get T any more. Also Denmark have now violated human rights and Declaration of Geneva. Good going Denmark.

That's too bad. We only have one doctor left that is not with the government. If they force him out too, then there is no way that we can't get any treatment. They don't treat trans people that are not heterosexual and are not stereotypical in their 'new' gender (and be over 18).

This means that we are forced to go to different countries to get hormones.

the meadia had focused more on the US voting (yeah obama!) and whatever incest should be legal or not, than to think of transgenders helthcase.
it said its "news" but realety is they only show what people wanna see and hear not what nessesarry is the news.
------
Yet its not complitely true.
there are 2 doctors left and probably a few more undiscovered,
the 1 doctor dosen't give homones for people less than 18 nope, but im unsure with the other one and wanna find out, in general I dont got alot of information about this.
But to be a bit selfish I will say first I would have to save my own a** and then later I can figure out for others. I am more relaxed that I will have some time to run on and I might be safe but I want to be 100% sure before going into details for the 18 - hope its understandable.

[unknown]

the meadia had focused more on the US voting (yeah obama!) and whatever incest should be legal or not, than to think of transgenders helthcase.
it said its "news" but realety is they only show what people wanna see and hear not what nessesarry is the news.
------
Yet its not complitely true.
there are 2 doctors left and probably a few more undiscovered,
the 1 doctor dosen't give homones for people less than 18 nope, but im unsure with the other one and wanna find out, in general I dont got alot of information about this.
But to be a bit selfish I will say first I would have to save my own a** and then later I can figure out for others. I am more relaxed that I will have some time to run on and I might be safe but I want to be 100% sure before going into details for the 18 - hope its understandable.

Wait. There is more doctors? I didn't know that.
I can understand you want to save yourself first. I you don't, then you can't really save anyone.

[Natkat]

Wait. There is more doctors? I didn't know that.
I can understand you want to save yourself first. I you don't, then you can't really save anyone.

I knew there probably where more but I hadnt heard about it before this week where I talked to my friend and dirrectly adviced me to seach up for it.

in general everyone with alittle knowlegde could precript homones if there into putting themself in a risk,
but mostly very few want to do that. I might be able to inform later on the doctor thing if not then I guess people from norway and denmark should try to get acceptence thouhgt the gender clinic in sweden which is better and with greater chances of permission Im gonna heard some friends whatever this option will be for people less than 18 as well.