Hi everyone~

[Cookies]

Hi everyone, i am new here found this great forum recently, not knowing how to start an introduction but...hope i am not too bad in doing this, sorry if its impolite, too long or broken english

24 year old MTF here, living in Malaysia a...country that isn't really trans-friendly here. Been wanted to be a girl since 9 but being ignored over and over, the first person i come out to was my mum and she ignored me over and over even when i kept telling her, trying not to make her sad by becoming what she had hoped me in becoming. Started to CD at 11, parents brought me to a psychiatrist at 13, who laughs at me when i told him about this...told my auntie after this who thinks i am possessed by evil spirits or something at 15~ then another counselor who mocks at my problem at 16.

Started to keep this to myself ever since and not trusting anyone with my problem anymore, playing computer games everyday nearly 24/7 to keep myself from thinking of this, isolating myself from everyone. Eventually i got tired of this where at 24, i took a knife from kitchen and said, here either you both kill me now or just let me do it. Only then i am being taken serious of, meeting a great doctor in KL here who is way better and understands my situation where he explained to my parents and finally they believed what i had been telling them was true.

Sometimes i do wonder if i had did that earlier maybe i could start earlier lol, but anyway things start to work out for me now.

Started HRT at July, there's no RLE here due to...Malaysia having a problem when someone tries to cross-dress due to some "public indecency" law. Also even if you had your op, non of your identification will be changed no matter what you do, there is a few exceptions...but that rarely happens.

Even i started this, my parents...seemed to avoid this as much as possible. Seldom calling my other name...its kind of disappointing... This made me getting impatient on having a more passable appearance as a female but most of them here looked way smaller than i am about 5"5 while i am about 5"7 and...my shoulders are rather

Still i am glad to find this forum, hoping to join this big family

[Cindy]

Hi Sis,

I'm Cindy and I'm in Australia. I have many Malaysian friends and students. I know how tough it must be for you. So hang in there.

There are lots of people here who can relate to your problems and we will all try and help.

Hugs

Cindy

[Jamie D]

Hello, waterbottle.  Welcome from southern California.

I once worked for a company that has an office in Kuala Lumpur.  I always wanted to visit.

By the way, your English is quite good.

[Cookies]

Thanks Cindy and Jamie, hope i can find many friends as nice as you both are here 

I don't live in KL, its about 2~3 hours ride from where i stay so...i only go there to meet my doc for blood tests and appointments. Things are rather expensive in KL, can't afford to live there.
Hope i don't sound weird at all 

[Cindy]

Golly Sis,

Once you have met JamieD there is nothing weird in the world.

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

Hi Waterbottle,

Welcome to our little family. Over 9250 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister.

And be sure to check out these links ( MUST READS )

• Site Terms of Service and rules to live by
  
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Janet 

[Catherine Sarah]

Hi Waterbottle,

Another big Aussie welcome to Susan's family. It's good of you to drop in and say "Hi". Hope you like it here, and you stay for a while.

There is a mountain of information, resources and friendship waiting for you here, you just need to jump in start talking and ask any question you like. You're quite safe here and we are very accepting.

Sounds like the odds are stacked against you in Malaysia. Particularly not being able to change your identity, officially. What would be the prospects of you moving to another country? Irrespective, we are here for you.

Looking forward to hearing more of your story in time to come, but in the meantime, be safe, well and happy.

Lotsa huggs
Catherine

[Jamie D]

Golly Sis,

Once you have met JamieD there is nothing weird in the world.

"Ain't it the truth!"

[DeeperThanSwords]

Hello and welcome to the community!

[spring0721]

Welcome waterbottle, sorry to hear of your struggle there in Malaysia.I am hopeful that you won't give up, and maybe one day you will have an opportunity to move.  Glad you're here!

[Devlyn]

Hi waterbottle, it's nice to meet you! Broken English works great, we have lots of Australian friends who speak like that, we'll have them translate for us. See you around the site, hugs, Devlyn

[Cookies]

Thanks for the warm welcome Ms. OBrien , Catherine , DeeperThanSwords , spring and Devlyn. Only if i had joined this forum earlier , and i will make sure i don't break any rules here 

I had thought about moving to another country too, my therapist told me that even after i had my op its best that i remain stealth due to no changes for names or gender on identification allowed here, wearing male clothing and everything at those airport/customs thing. No matter how i look in the future, if i have to show my ID to a police with the M marked up there while gotten myself dressed in female clothing i might get jailed. I read about a few cases regarding MTF being locked up together with males due to this

There are still things i can't leave behind so...its not really possible to leave here at the moment. But i am not giving it up here i waited 15 years for that, and there aren't many 15 years up ahead 

"Ain't it the truth!"

( make a mental note )

[DeeperThanSwords]

I'm glad you are seeing this as moving forward, that is positive! Is Malaysia very bad for helping transgendered people?
I am sad to know that you feel you have to leave your country because of who you are. Nobody should have to feel like that.

[Cookies]

Malaysia is actually a Islamic country, Muslims aren't really accepting about that and most of the government posts are taken by them so...there is even one instance where 4 muslims banned from dressing as female despite they had op, so it can be annoying here.

So...being stealth is usually the best choice here unless you want trouble XD

[DeeperThanSwords]

Malaysia is actually a Islamic country, Muslims aren't really accepting about that and most of the government posts are taken by them so...there is even one instance where 4 muslims banned from dressing as female despite they had op, so it can be annoying here.

So...being stealth is usually the best choice here unless you want trouble XD

That's terrible!  . And very sad.

[spring0721]

Oooh, that's horrible....I REALLY hope you can get out of there soon. Maybe try for a student visa & go to school elsewhere.

[Cookies]

Getting out of here is a maybe, just hope everything would go smoothly at the moment