I told my best friend

[Nik]

I told my Best friend, she didn't even seem that surprised, she was very suportive. 

I had to tell her over e-mail, she lives about six hours away it's how we talk.
I sent out the e-mail yesterday, I've been waiting for a reply, sweating bullets.

She's the first person in my life I've actually told.

It went well, I'm so happy I had to tell somebody!

[Pica Pica]

What did you tell her exactly? That you feel like either gender?

[Nik]

Sorry I wasn't specific.

Yes, I told her that I was Bigender, and maybe I'm making a bigger deal out of it than it is, but it seems that way to me.

I feel better just having told one person that I'm not a girl that sometimes acts like a guy, but a girl who often feels like I am a guy or sometimes neither or both.

[Pica Pica]

Well you certainly look the part, I thought you were a guy that felt like a girl, judging by the photo.

Androgony is a horrid role to play as there is no role laid out for us. Sometimes I like the pioneer spirit, but it's a difficult kind of thing to actually be.

Also, I was wondering how you felt that it affected you, especially enough to say to someone - and to flat outright and boldly declare that you feel like nothing in particular is a strong move.

[Nik]

Thank you very much for the picture comment, by the way, I've been trying to look less female.

I don't switch back and forth too much, it's more of a subtle thing. I can be playing a violent video game in the morning, and watching a chick flick with my mom in the evening. I just get to be me. I feel more like a guy when I do masculine things and more like a girl when I do feminine things. Some stuff seems to balance, like when I draw I don't feel like either. I help my dad fix the plumbing, and I help my mom do the laundry. They've always let me be me, at least. They gave up on having a "little girl" when I was very small. The biggest difference since I discovered I was bigendered is that I don't mentally chide myself for feeling like a guy, or wanting to be percieved as a guy from time to time. I guess I thought that since I had no desire for GRS that made me a girl, period, a somewhat masculine girl, yes, but still a girl. Physically it's wierd, because I like my feminine hips and my masculine shoulders. My breasts bug be badly, but I started binding and it's done wonders for how I feel about myself, especially in public. I am now rambling, so I am going to stop.

[Kendall]

Good job.

Telling others is the very hard for me, but has been 50 times rewarding in the weight thats lifted off of me.

So I know how you feel.

Congratz.

Kendall

[Mia and Marq]

I've been slowly and methodically cornering my friends and telling them creating a larger and larger network of people that "are in the know" about me being bigendered. Its stressful everytime though but its getting easier each time. I've prepared myself for the questions and the biggest thing that bothers me is when people respond by pretty much just ignoring that aspect of me. I suppose its how some people deal.


Marq and Mia

[Pica Pica]

I would never feel the need of telling anyone unless it came up in conversation, when i became atheist I didn't go around and say, I'm an atheist, I only asked when they asked me why i didn't go to church. Would seem the same procedure... Why are you doing that? Well, I feel that i don't have a gender so i choose the bits i like.

Seems to be making a big public deal of a personal change elsewise.

[Lucy]

Im very slowly expanding my circle of friends that know, it helps to have some support. I do agree with Pica why tell if u dont have to but true friends do listen and will help.

[Pica Pica]

My friends typical response has been,;

"Yeah, so what? Are you going to buy me that drink or am I going to have to pull faces and look like a sad puppy?"

[sparkles]

i found that too pica

last time i went out with them i made a big effort to dress in an andro way full works and all i got is your looking good right where are we gonig for a drink then. i suppose its good that they just exept you as is but its bloody enoying when you want to talk about it to someone. i was wondering if it was that people want to ignore the complcated parts of peoples lives. though i do thin i need to stop talking about myself all the time i really am not that interesting

[Intertween]

i was wondering if it was that people want to ignore the complcated parts of peoples lives.

I think you're exactly right.

-- Sue

[Kendall]

I think telling family and loved ones (best friends and lovers) is the telling that gives you the weight off of your head, even if things end up for the worse. I dont tell casual friends or passing strangers. Only the people that are dear and near to me. I think there is a big difference. And best friends I think are included in that inner circle of relationships.