Majority of transguys are gay?

[Tossu-sama]

I'm a bisexual. Well, at least I think I'm that. Considering it's kinda hard for me to imagine myself with a guy but all the possible celebrity crushes etc I have are on men.

[geek]

i think.. im not sure.. i dont know ;_; I'm pretty sure if it wasnt for the fact that i love playing with girls bits so much i'd be gay :3

[ajayjo]

im straight here too. Yeah i noticed mostly ftms are gay/bi here but i do respect them for who they are. its their life. its cool with me i dont care. i have one ftm friend that gay, its dont bother me at all.

[FTMDiaries]

It's also interesting that a large proportion of MtFs appear to be lesbians. I wonder why?

Okay, I'm going to throw this idea out for you to think about (no offense intended, YMMV etc.): it's pretty much accepted that gender identity and sexuality are separate issues that are generated by separate areas of the brain. Right?

So... is it at all possible that the part of the brain that determines gender identity is affected by whatever causes GD; but the part that determines the physical features (i.e. sex) that you'll be attracted to might not be affected by it? This could possibly explain why a lot of transsexuals seem to be attracted to people who present as the opposite of their own birth sex - just like the majority of the population. And why some are attracted to people who are the same as their birth sex. In other words, we're just normal people like anyone else.

Socially speaking, this would make us define ourselves as gay because that is the accepted term for a man attracted to other men, but perhaps it's a bit more complicated than that.

And likewise for MtFs: could some of them have a brain that is 'stereotypically male' in its sexual attraction function but 'stereotypically female' in its gender identity function?

Or perhaps I'm just talking out my backside...

[geek]

I actually have a question for the gay boys in here (bi boys too!) how do you handle the "appendage" issue talk? Are bio boys that way inclined pretty open minded to our unique situation? I actually feel dumb for asking it, it's just something I've never given any thought to what so ever. Bit thinking about it now.. We are probably the holy grail of sexy times to bisexual guys

[Nygeel]

Femininity and straightness aren't really opposites, or two things that can't exist in one guy.

Pre-T I considered myself straight. Now, I don't. For me, I am heavily attracted to personality over the physical and I kinda realized that it's possible for a person of any gender to have what I want. Plus, I wasn't having sex or going on dates because nobody seemed okay with me being trans. Figured, bigger potential dating pool might help (it has not).

[Shang]

I actually have a question for the gay boys in here (bi boys too!) how do you handle the "appendage" issue talk? Are bio boys that way inclined pretty open minded to our unique situation? I actually feel dumb for asking it, it's just something I've never given any thought to what so ever. Bit thinking about it now.. We are probably the holy grail of sexy times to bisexual guys

My ex, who knew I was trans, was an a**hole about it.  He never treated me how I wanted to be treated and insisted on me being the woman.  Since I had those bits, to him I wasn't male [I got enough "You can't get rid of these! I love them!" "Or I'll miss your boobs." to fill a book].  He was bisexual, or claimed to be, and was very adverse to me transitioning as that meant he would no longer be dating a "female", but instead would be dating a male.  I generally don't like sex anyway because of having girl bits, but having sex with a guy who refused to see me as male...It just made things worse. 

Edit:  I now refuse to date until part way through my transition, or most of the way.  Maybe all of the way.  I'm not going to be treated like a piece of meat.

[Jared]

I think trans gay guys have much problem than the straight ftm's finding a partner. That's why it seems like most transguys are gay too. I don't know, forgive me if I'm way too wrong 

[Natkat]

I think its a mix that we are on a pretty openminded forum when it comes to sexuaety and gender, so people dont feel like they need to hide + the fact that for many comming out as gay/bi is more easy than comming out as trans, not for all but its my experience. I sure had abit problem being bi, but as I where out it was a rather small deal for me cause being trans where like so much more troblesome, many cisguys who come out and havent tried being trans and seamed to make a bigger deal out of it and worry alot. also I seen the thing on many people being gay or bi or whatever on the net for comunetys who seams to have a pretty openminded view for sexualety,

I actually have a question for the gay boys in here (bi boys too!) how do you handle the "appendage" issue talk? Are bio boys that way inclined pretty open minded to our unique situation? I actually feel dumb for asking it, it's just something I've never given any thought to what so ever. Bit thinking about it now.. We are probably the holy grail of sexy times to bisexual guys

the reaction is very diffrent depending on person to person. some guys are cool with it, some guys are idiots, some guys think its pretty hot,

[Nero]

I'm straight (and stealth) in public. Behind closed doors, I'm bi. I'm more instantly turned on by women's bodies, but more emotionally attracted to men. I get men. I can't relate to women or how they think. So, I doubt I could ever have a real connection with one. Anyhow, like I've said elsewhere on here: I'm pretty certain my attraction to men is not innate.

[geek]

I think trans gay guys have much problem than the straight ftm's finding a partner. That's why it seems like most transguys are gay too. I don't know, forgive me if I'm way too wrong 

you know... Now I feel like a real idiot lol, I'm not even sure how I couldn't have come to that conclusion on my own!

Thanks all of you for answering when I derailed the thread with my lunacy.

Edit:  I now refuse to date until part way through my transition, or most of the way.  Maybe all of the way.  I'm not going to be treated like a piece of meat.

Aaron, this makes me very sad. mostly because of the stuff you said before it, but because you feel to keep that part of you hidden so you can emotionally deal with it.


Apologies for format yada yada on phone in bed woke up bad dream.

[Nero]

I think trans gay guys have much problem than the straight ftm's finding a partner. That's why it seems like most transguys are gay too. I don't know, forgive me if I'm way too wrong 

you know... Now I feel like a real idiot lol, I'm not even sure how I couldn't have come to that conclusion on my own!

Thanks all of you for answering when I derailed the thread with my lunacy.

Funny, you don't appear to be a lunatic. 
It's a legit question. Honestly, I don't know. I've never been with a gay guy. Been with bi ones though who didn't mind the use of plastic. Haven't dated much since my partner passed. I've never found myself attracted to a gay dude to my knowledge, so I don't know. Not sure if I'm going to just date women now or what.

[Nygeel]

We are probably the holy grail of sexy times to bisexual guys

And that makes me feel icky. I'm not in between, a holy grail, or some perfect mixture of body parts for somebody.

[geek]

And that makes me feel icky. I'm not in between, a holy grail, or some perfect mixture of body parts for somebody.

of course not, but it's a big world and it's filled with different types of people, unfortunately there's already "->-bleeped-<-s" and I'm sure it's only the ->-bleeped-<-s that actually have that view. I didn't mean to come across insensitive, honestly.


Edit: more meaning I think bi guys would be more open to it than purely gay guys I guess. I think I'll save my posting until I wake up fully so I don't anger people :3

[Nero]

We are probably the holy grail of sexy times to bisexual guys

I don't think I'd mind it. I'm a holy grail if ever there was one. lol
I'd rather the guy in question be straight though.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Or perhaps I'm just talking out my backside...

You sound like you're afraid to step on toes, lol.

Actually I have thought about it. It's perfectly possible, we don't know everything about how the brain works. GID doesn't even have to mean that every part of your mind is perfectly in sync with the opposite sex, it's a complicated medical condition, not a switch up.

I wouldn't look at Susan's if you wanted to look at an entire demographic, it seems like it's a poor representation. For starters I don't think 90% of all transsexuals are white, and I think that the percentage of people who transitioned later in life is smaller than it may seem.

[dalebert]

I'm sure it's only the ->-bleeped-<-s that actually have that view.

I hope not. If a right-handed person says they prefer right-handed scissors, you'd probably say "Duh! You're right-handed." If a gay guy expresses any kind of preference for bits that are compatible with his bits, he risks being labeled a ->-bleeped-<- or a fetishist, maybe even has his sexuality questioned. Occasionally it seems like some folks are a little quick to apply those labels. I'm sure it's appropriate sometimes, of course. A preference is one thing; obsession is another.

[sneakersjay]

I have been with the sum total of 1 cis gay guy and he didn't care about my size (I had a meta). I did ask him if he would have been OK with my former bits, and he said he wasn't sure, but if he liked me enough (like he did) then he didn't think it would be a problem.  His main concern was that I was happy.

But I have met a lot of gay guys recently and there are some for whom size does not matter. Of course, there are others who obsess over size.  There are also those who worship micro dicks for whatever reason, though I'm not sure I want to be the object of someone's fetish.


Jay

[Nero]

I'm sure it's only the ->-bleeped-<-s that actually have that view.

I hope not. If a right-handed person says they prefer right-handed scissors, you'd probably say "Duh! You're right-handed." If a gay guy expresses any kind of preference for bits that are compatible with his bits, he risks being labeled a ->-bleeped-<- or a fetishist, maybe even has his sexuality questioned. Occasionally it seems like some folks are a little quick to apply those labels. I'm sure it's appropriate sometimes, of course. A preference is one thing; obsession is another.

I agree. I wouldn't care if someone wanted me for my unusual body. I'm more bothered by the 'man-lite' idea. That gets tossed around a lot. You know, people who can't stand cis guys but would date an ftm because he's supposedly 'softer', more womanly, etc. Well, I hate to break it to them, but I've got only the bare minimum of female socialization. In fact, most of my socialization is just a lack of repression from not being raised male.

The only person I'd accept the 'man lite' attitude from would be a straight guy. Let him frame it however he needs to frame it as long as I get that ass.

But yeah, I wouldn't mind if a girl or guy wanted me for my pussy. That'd probably be a real turn on actually.

[Zerro]

To be honest, I don't feel like sexuality has much to do with your own gender in the long run(at least for me, personally). I can't figure out if I prefer men or women(though I guess I've been leaning a lot more towards women over the past few months), but I still know I'm a dude. I know a lot more straight dudes that happen to be trans, and I find that they tend to prefer keeping it on the down low once they're passing consistently. The gay trans dudes I know are more active in the 'community' and tend to be more vocal about their status.