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Does this make me weird or is it common?

Started by lydia_s, February 27, 2013, 12:56:13 PM

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lydia_s

I don't know if this is any level normal or if I'm just weird. I know I'm trans and I've been positive about it as long as I can remember, but there is virtually zero femininity in me as a person. In fact I tend to remind myself of Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor from Home Improvement (exceptionally manly, tool-obsessed gearhead). I love working on cars and shopping at tool stores. I've built death traps with motors out of scrap. When I was a kid I had a huge Hotwheels collection, and I rode around on a powerwheels powered by a starter motor out of a '78 GMC. My first go kart was an '81 Murray lawn tractor with an idler pulley on the transaxle. Thing went 45. It's basically why everybody who's known me was very surprised when I came out- to them I'm about as manly as one can be. Does this make me weird or is it somewhat common? I kinda feel like a misfit wherever I go.


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suzifrommd

Quote from: lydia_s on February 27, 2013, 12:56:13 PM
Does this make me weird or is it somewhat common? I kinda feel like a misfit wherever I go.

Every trans woman I've ever met has characteristics and interests that many people would consider masculine.

Luckily, like cis women, we're entitled to be whatever kind of women we want.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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kitten

Well there are CiS girls out there that can be into cars and mechanical work and otherwise have hobby's or tastes that are usually defined as more masculine but in the end does that make them any less of a girl than the rest just because their tastes don't lean towards what others consider the norm? No they are just as much a girl as the next. I guess what I'm saying is no your not weird your an individual with your own tastes and hobby's and if people wish to judge you as less than what you are because of them then in my opinion they need to broaden their horizons a little^^
The mind is the inmate the body is the cell and society is the jailer.
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natastic

Quote from: lydia_s on February 27, 2013, 12:56:13 PM
I don't know if this is any level normal or if I'm just weird. I know I'm trans and I've been positive about it as long as I can remember, but there is virtually zero femininity in me as a person.

I can relate.  Whether or not its normal?  I've asked myself this question, and more or less decided that it doesn't matter what the answer is.  On a good day, I can tell myself with conviction that nothing about my interests, personality, or demeanor makes me any less of a woman that I know myself to be.

Quote
I kinda feel like a misfit wherever I go.

Me too!  This has caused me a lot of suffering and awkwardness, but again on a good day I feel like I can own it, and work it.

On a good day, it feels really good to feel like a truly unique individual.  Notsomuch an outcast, but rather just an oddball :)



P.S. You certainly have greater than zero femininity in your appearance!  You look good.
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natastic

I believe that the standard "trans narrative" is simply that -- it's a story.  Some people fit that story more than others.  It is by no means a standard to measure oneself against, and conformance to or deviation from that narrative has no functional bearing on whether or not you "really are" a woman.

I wrestled with this for a long time and I still do.  I don't fit that description, but I don't really want to.

The most important part of my transition is giving myself an honest chance to be the person I feel like I am.  I'm starting to accept the fact that I'm trans, independently from anyone else's standards.
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bethany

I don't find it weird at all. Cis woman can be into the same things you are, look at Danica Patrick driving race cars for a living. I'm big into sports. My grandmother got me into watching Baseball, while my father hates most sports. You like what you like and just because they might be looked at as a masculine activity does not mean that woman can't like the same things.
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kitten

Quote from: encircle me on February 27, 2013, 01:23:03 PM
I believe that the standard "trans narrative" is simply that -- it's a story.

The most important part of my transition is giving myself an honest chance to be the person I feel like I am.  I'm starting to accept the fact that I'm trans, independently from anyone else's standards.

Encircle makes a good point you shouldn't have to fit in a narrative someone else wrote you, I feel a person should strive to be who they feel they are not what others feel they should be.
The mind is the inmate the body is the cell and society is the jailer.
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Kelly J. P.

Many women are into cars like that.

I go to a class full of them.
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MaidofOrleans

I'm pretty masculine in terms of interests and hobbies.

Personality and appearance wise I'm more feminine.
"For transpeople, using the right pronoun is NOT simply a 'political correctness' issue. It's core to the entire struggle transpeople go through. Using the wrong pronoun means 'I don't recognize you as who you are.' It means 'I think you're confused, delusional, or mentally I'll.'. It means 'you're not important enough for me to acknowledge your struggle.'"
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A

I think it's neither weird nor especially common. A lot of trans women I read about here have a "manly man" job. Cars, heavy industry, wood chopping, fridge moving...

It's not weird because there are many, and it's not common because it's far from a majority.

If anything, you're lucky, because with such tastes, you're free of any doubts you might have about being a guy who likes girls' things, for example. :p
A's Transition Journal
Last update: June 11th, 2012
No more updates
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Carrie Liz

There's more than one way to be a girl. Just because someone identifies as a girl doesn't mean that they have to suddenly want to be traditionally feminine. I still have a LOT of interests that I would consider to be masculine... but I'm not transitioning because I want to give those things up to pursue more feminine hobbies, I'm transitioning because I want to be a girl doing those things. That is who I am.

Some things will indeed change over time. It happens. But just let it come naturally. The point of transitioning is to become who you truly are, not just to trade one form of gender suppression, feeling pressured into doing only masculine things, for another, feeling pressured into doing only feminine things. Be yourself! That's what this is all about! And it's a beautiful thing when it finally happens!
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TerriT

I don't have a lot of manly hobbies but I am a gun nut. I wish I was Sarah Conner TBH.
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Jayne

My ex fixes her own motorbike, loves football & does DIY (when she can be bothered to drag her lazy ass off the settee).
In the early 90's I went to college to learn engineering & welding & we had a woman on the course, on the evenings she was very feminine but when she got on a lathe or welder she was better at it than most of the men, she could also run rings round most of the men when they started with the male banter.
Plenty of women have "male" interests, I find the whole idea of male/female interests to be very outdated.
If you like something then just do it, don't let outdated concepts rule your life
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Kevin Peña

Um, if you think that liking cars makes you a man, then what do you have to say about this?



Feel better?
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kira21 ♡♡♡

I only really like girly stuff and only really ever have. I have the same amount of doubts as anyone else and probably a lot of the same ones.

Just part of life.

You look amazing and from what I have read of your posts I think you sound like a really cool gal too, so who cares what's normal. Is is normal to be so cool? lol :-) Who cares :-)

Steph :-)
x

MaidofOrleans

Quote from: DianaP on February 27, 2013, 05:49:57 PM
Um, if you think that liking cars makes you a man, then what do you have to say about this?



Feel better?

Eeeewwwwww
"For transpeople, using the right pronoun is NOT simply a 'political correctness' issue. It's core to the entire struggle transpeople go through. Using the wrong pronoun means 'I don't recognize you as who you are.' It means 'I think you're confused, delusional, or mentally I'll.'. It means 'you're not important enough for me to acknowledge your struggle.'"
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Kevin Peña

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alice10

Quote from: lydia_s on February 27, 2013, 12:56:13 PM
Does this make me weird or is it somewhat common? I kinda feel like a misfit wherever I go.

No your not werid. There are plenty of girls into the same things as you. I loveee cars and working on them. I can't tell you how many guys think its hot. I get so many compliments. Bad ass chick car.

Heres my subie

Started transition October 2011
Went fulltime Nov 29 2012
SRS hopefully by 2014



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MaidofOrleans

Quote from: DianaP on February 27, 2013, 06:57:53 PM
Hey, "manly" or otherwise, we're all beautiful in our own ways.  :)

uhhh no...still eeeewwww  ;)
"For transpeople, using the right pronoun is NOT simply a 'political correctness' issue. It's core to the entire struggle transpeople go through. Using the wrong pronoun means 'I don't recognize you as who you are.' It means 'I think you're confused, delusional, or mentally I'll.'. It means 'you're not important enough for me to acknowledge your struggle.'"
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Kevin Peña

Quote from: MaidofOrleans on February 27, 2013, 09:34:07 PM
uhhh no...still eeeewwww  ;)

Well, you'd be surprised as to how many guys are attracted to "manly" qualities in women. Like Alice said, these attributes yield lots of compliments.

Here's one that I heard from a guy looking at a women's bodybuilding poster:

"I'd tap that iron p***y."  :o ???
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