Hi Shawn,
Self preservation, you are doing the right thing. I have a friend of mine, he was bi-polar, manic depressive at 20 years of age, on meds, I think he broke down around age 40. I didn't know him when he was first diagnosed, met him in the late 70's. The seond time, he just disappeared, only found out after he came back in my wife & my life, that he was suicidal, lost his business, was in a support home for a while. He finally grabbed hold of his life, actually somehow found a way to be off his meds, surprisingly his conditions, he overcame & they disappeared. He rebuilt his life, started his business anew. He is a motivational speaker and is involved with organizations regarding depression, spreading the word, been interviewed by the media on mental health awareness. We are close friends, see each other every other month. We have gone to meetings that he has given speeches. He is my hero.
So there is hope that your condition may go away. You have my heartfelt Best wishes that you have a good life ahead for you.
Bless you too!
Jamie