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Larisa/Matthew's story

Started by Larisa, March 27, 2013, 10:52:15 PM

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Larisa

Ive been looking for a place that wont judge me at all. Im not sure if Im transgender or bi-gender. I needed some answers and all. That being so Ive needed some advice. I have had a girl side since I was little like back even when I was 4 or so. I never wanted to play with GiJoes, I wanted to play with my sisters barbies. My mom dressed me as a girl for Halloween around that time as well. It didn't make me feel weird nor did playing with barbies. I would also love to look at my sisters jewelry when she was not looking. I would also dress up in dresses when I was 11 or 12. I liked looking like a girl in them. My sister would help me with it. Around when I was 11 or 12, my sister bought me a girly book for Christmas as a joke. I read the whole book and all and would go check out more of those books and buying a few more of as well. I loved it. Into when I was in junior high, I started wearing girl's swimming suits, panties, girl's shirts, bras, Maxie pads and more. I thought I looked cute but did this in private. Into high school, this wasn't a huge thing but a part of my life but I still did dress up here and there. After high school, I would still dress up. I remember my parents finding one of my girly shirts I stole from me sister. That made me nervous. Into later on, I became more in to girly stuff. I would dress up and would sleep in a pair of panties, a bra, a cute girls shirt now and than. It was something that made me feel like a girl. I would also do more girly things and got more into girl type music which was strange for some considering Im a metal fan. I over the last 3 or 4 years have bought alot of girls clothes, makeup, jewelry, girly glasses and band rings, and so on. Im wearing my hair out long and than want it blonde. I dont wear belts and instead roll them over, stick my thumbs in my pockets, play with my hair. I paint my toenails every so often. Ive always worn long nails and rarly cut them. Ive been told they are like girls nails and have been told the same about my laugh which Ive been told is like kendra wilkinson's laugh. I have a very very slight girly voice sometimes. I do alot of oh my god, ya know and such now and than. Ive got many girl mannerisms. My voice usually is boyish. I like to hang with girls alot more than boys even though I have guy friends. Ive liked to hang with girls alot since I was very little.

I will look at girls and think man your hot but other times Im like, I want boobs and all and be able to go out and be a girl like other girls. I hate facial hair, chest hair and such. I have been known to shave my legs and all. I wear a girly shirt hidden when Im out recently. I wear a necklace often. I also like talking fashion. I know girl style really well. I also at other times think I couldnt leave being a boy at all. Am I transgender or not? I know this isnt a phase. I havent been able to figure this out. I relate to girls soo much! I need advice. Ive been looking for an answer for a year now.
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V M

The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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Ms. OBrien CVT

Hi Larisa, :icon_wave:

Welcome to our little family. Over 10616  strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister.


Janet  )O(

  
It does not take courage or bravery to change your gender.  It takes fear of living one more day in the wrong one.~me
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Larisa

Aw thanks guys!! :) I hope you all can help me on this.
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kira21 ♡♡♡

Hiya Larisa,

It sounds to me like you are on the gender spectrum, or at least not completely cis-gendered, but I don't think anyone here can really answer your question of whether you are TG or not. Gender is something of a personal identity. You have to work that out yourself. Or at least if you do get a load of responses, judging by past threads there will be various opinions in different directions and no real consensus. That's because its a personal thing. We can't decide for you if you are.

Stick around, talk to us. See how you feel about the things that get discussed. Try and work it out for yourself. If you can, see a councillor?

Good luck with it all :-)

Steph :-)
x

Larisa

I def dont feel ashamed of who I am which helps me soo much. Ive been searching for an answer for awhile now. Only a few people know about this part of me. They are so supportive of me. I just wish I could figure the answer out for me. I sometimes wish I could be a girl for a few days and let larisa out of me instead of having to hide her from the world.
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Devlyn

Hi Larisa, welcome to Susan's Place! I'm the resident Bostonian, get busy making friends and I'll see you around the site! Hugs, Devlyn
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