New Service Available at Wal-Mart
One day, in line at a company cafeteria, Joe says to
Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I
better see a doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money,"
Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at
Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer
will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It
takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars... a lot
cheaper than a doctor."
So Joe puts a urine sample in a small jar and takes it
to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer
lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the
sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later,
the computer ejects a printout:
You have tennis elbow. Soak it in warm water and avoid
heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank
you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.
That afternoon, while thinking how amazing this new
technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer
could be fooled. When he got home, he mixed some tap
water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from
his wife and daughter and his own sperm sample for
good measure, and hurried to Wal-Mart before it
closed, eager to check the results.
He deposited ten dollars, poured in his concoction,
and awaited the results. The computer lights up, and
ten seconds later prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener
kit. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal
shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into
rehab.
4 Your wife is pregnant, Twins. They aren't yours. Get
a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow
will never get better.
Thank you for shopping at Wal-mart!
