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A little advice please?

Started by Judge Yourself, May 28, 2007, 12:52:57 PM

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Judge Yourself

i'm supposed to be meeting up with a friend on Wednesday without my binder - cause im still waiting on it to come, shes already booked bus tickets and got someone to look after her Gran (shes her carer) and went to a whole load of truoble and i don't wanna bail on her - since shes been really supportive. But i'm really not comfortable with her seeing me *like that* either...

Its my first time meeting her in person and ugh i dont want her first impression to be of me like that...

Its not just that, its also i feel id be cheating myself by being someone im not... ugh..

Any advice would be welcome...
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J.T.

so this is an online friend?  that alone can be nerve wracking.  You said she's been really supportive, so i don't think she will really care if you have a binder or not.  She probably won't notice, and will just be excited to have finally met you in person.

QuoteIts not just that, its also i feel id be cheating myself by being someone im not... ugh..

how so?  You're still yourself on the inside, right??
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Pysgod

Dude....just go out and have fun and be yourself. Show her a good time. As long as you have confidence it'll be cool.
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Judge Yourself

Yeah its an online friend, but I know her really pretty well and she's not bothered at all, I just worry that after she seems me she will always see 'girl' and think of that when she sees me... lasting impressions worry me

i'm not so fussed about meeting her cause ive done so with a lot of my friends online - besides we'll be going to a bar also :D though that also means having to bring my passport since i dont pass as 23...or even 18 thesedays apparently :P

Yeah i'm still myself i just feel less of such when i look at myself and see .. well stuff i dont want to much... I guess its lame but i feel like im having to portray myself as something i'm not.
Quote from: Pysgod on May 28, 2007, 02:54:56 PM
Dude....just go out and have fun and be yourself. Show her a good time. As long as you have confidence it'll be cool.
i'm getting there a bit with the whole confidence thing, since i got myself some decent clothes today - so im hoping that will see me through :)
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J.T.

Quotei feel like im having to portray myself as something i'm not

i get where you're coming from... but you're assuming she's gonna see a girl.  Pysgod is right, go in there with confidence and that is what she'll see.

Lasting impressions... interesting choice of words.  That is what matters, not first impression.  She already knows you from online :)
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Judge Yourself

That is true, and i guess i can pass reasonably well already, hence the clothing incident today. I've gained a lot more confidence since then and yeah definitely, lasting impressions are what matters :) Besides, ive just spoken to her and shes really supportive and cool - i guess i just freak out sometimes...
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Rachael

not really. Seriously, when one of my best friends now, met me first time, she was told i was a girl, even in boymode... and she cant think of me as a boy ever. even having seen me pretty damn convinceingly male. People who meet and know YOU, wont think anything but who you are. be yourself, be confident, and be the person shes friends with. she wont care, i garuntee...
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rhondabythebay

I have to concur with the posts so far. Just be yourself, you know who you are. Have fun.

Rhonda
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Renae.Lupini

Remember my shopping suggestions? they still apply here. The bonus in this situation is she knows you already. I know the first time meeting someone we all want to look our best. Don't worry about what she *might* think about you. Just be yourself, hangout, and above all, have some {firetruck} fun. :)
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Judge Yourself

Thanks guys, just  checked the post today and it looks like nothing today again so I'm gonna prepare myself for having to go as is. Renae you're right, im gonna tackle it the same way and most likely sit there and wonder why i was so worried in the first place. I'm glad shes such a good friend though, talking to her atm and shes trying to convince me itll be ok :)

Thanks for all the advice guys :)
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