After my first suicide attempt I made it a point to quit trying to make everyone else happy, and start doing what makes me happy. That's when I discovered I was transgender. I wasn't one of those kids that told their parents that I felt like a boy, I didn't always know. I hate when people make me feel like this is less valid for me. I didn't just choose this life path willingly. Who wants to be discriminated and possibly shunned from their family because they just felt like they wanted to try being trans? I'm not that. I feel like a guy. I have horrible dysphoria with my body. I hate the judgement I receive even though I can't help it. I'm just going with the flow and doing what makes me happy and comfortable. I know that I want to be on T at some point, and I've talked with a counselor who will sign the papers when I'm ready to take to my doctors. I want to wait sometime to know that this is really the right choice for me in the long run since it's quite the commitment. How do you know when it's time? I feel ready, but am unsure. I fear I'm jumping in too fast. I want to be read as male, I want the outside to match the inside. It's horribly painful right now, and I would hate to have to go another year of this self hate and being upset with people that try to tell me what's in my pants and what isn't.
Sorry for the rant. I just want to know a safe or average amount of time people typically wait before making the decision to go on HTR.
Thank you for any help you can give me.
