Emotions

[Riley Skye]

Recently I've been getting rather emotional, I'm either happy and content with myself, feeling like sad and having to cry and just plain lonely. Just so many emotions that I'm starting to find it a tad difficult to handle now. My emotions have been getting so intense that I'm simply not used to it. Honestly I've been very happy overall and I'm finally starting to feel complete on the inside for the first time in my life. I'm just simply not used to having such strong emotions.

[Carrie Liz]

Yeah, me too. It happens. It feels like I'm walking on eggshells a lot of the time. Crying at the stupidest little things, and constantly going back and forth from "OMG this is the best thing ever!" to being curled up in a ball on my bed feeling depressed for no reason.

Well, as my roommate says, "Welcome to the wonderful world of women."

I'd also love to see some advice on getting used to this, and keeping a grip on those crazy emotions.

[Jamie D]

Oh gosh, Julia, I was having days where I was laughing and crying at the same time.

You are young still.  When I started HRT, I was already in my 50s.  I had been in "male mode" for so long, that I felt I had no emotions left.

Wow, was I wrong.

[sam79]

Oh Julia, I know exactly what you mean.

It's kinda like, before HRT, I only ever felt one thing, and not all that intensely. Now with HRT, WOW!. I can feel happy and sad at the same time, calm and aggravated!. And all emotions are far more intense! As my therapist said to me, "welcome to being a woman".

In terms of dealing with it, I'm not doing all that great either. The lows are low... It's taking a huge amount of effort to hold myself together on the bad days. I hope someone wise can help us out.

[suzifrommd]

My experience is a bit different. I never really grew up or gave up my childhood tendency to get excited or tearful at the drop of a hat. So maybe that's why E hasn't really had an emotional effect on me.

Life is better when you let it in.

[Rabbit]

They have made me completely bananas. They say that hormones take some getting used to , and at first it is more intense... but i'm past 25 months now, and the hormones still regularly throw me for loops. I have a feeling it is just something I need to get used to....

But I'm not so sure this is just "a girl thing". None of the women I know think this is normal. Like, I'm crying a few times a week typically...or every month or two I go completely bananas for a couple days and have some wild mood swings and everything seems off (this just happened again for the last few days).

So... yea.... hormones... crazy stuff ~_~

[Riley Skye]

Its crazy! But at the same time liberating because I can finally feel again. I'm happy that I can feel human and not just depressed a d dysphoric all the time. I like finally experiencing emotions and such

[Riley Skye]

To me it was just sadness all the time no matter what. I was in denial about myself and just blocked so much that I couldn't feel anything but sadness and depression, it was empty and hallow. Now it just feels so vivid and I gladly take the ups and downs that the hormones are giving me because it's making me feel human again.

[Joanna Dark]

Hmm, I'm not sure if I am any more emotional then I've ever been. I've always cried at sad movies, music, or anything that touches me on an emotional level. I am certainly more calm. I was calm before, most of the time, but I could get mad and really find it hard to become angry now, if not impossible. That's prob declaring war on my T levels though lol

[Nero]

Honestly, I wonder if the extreme emotions some trans women feel aren't related to the high doses of E/spiro/etc. they take. I mean I hear tales of trans women becoming way more emotional than is 'normal' for most cis women.

My experience is a bit different. I never really grew up or gave up my childhood tendency to get excited or tearful at the drop of a hat. So maybe that's why E hasn't really had an emotional effect on me.

Life is better when you let it in.

It's the same for me in reverse. I'm kind of nonplussed by all the guys and girls having such extreme reactions on HRT. My libido has always been off the charts and has not increased and the only emotional difference is I'm less able to physically cry (but still feel emotions just as intensely and maybe even magnified by the inability to release through tears).

[RachelH]

Likewise I would cry at things, but restrained, well before HRT.  However, along with allowing myself to express them, the emotions have got more intense as well.

But the main thing I found was that they can now change at slightest thing and I can go from the happiest bouncing super excited girl, to a very dark p****d of b***h in the space of a few words.  My girl friends just told me "welcome to been a women" and that I'd learn to control showing it by putting on a little bit of a show, even though I WILL want to cry my eyes out or rip someone's throat out I'll have to learn most of the time to look alright at the least. lol!

But as Julia said the emotions are so much more vivid, and I'll gladly take the up's and downs, as I actually feel that I'm alive.  Been in the relatively emotional dead zone that was been male was horrible.

[Natkat]

Honestly, I wonder if the extreme emotions some trans women feel aren't related to the high doses of E/spiro/etc. they take. I mean I hear tales of trans women becoming way more emotional than is 'normal' for most cis women.

It's the same for me in reverse. I'm kind of nonplussed by all the guys and girls having such extreme reactions on HRT. My libido has always been off the charts and has not increased and the only emotional difference is I'm less able to physically cry (but still feel emotions just as intensely and maybe even magnified by the inability to release through tears).

I feel emotions moodswings but not the same as on pre T. its more like im totally restless and need to run but still too lazy to do anything.

I had a month where I had to go of T, I remember I where sitting in my Room crying for no reason at all,
after T I dont cry that randomly anymore I just get tense and annoyed.

[XxHaileyxX]

This thread is pretty good, i will talk to my friend about your experiences so she can be somewhat prepared, lol

My own experiences i dont know if they would be useful to her.   

[Tristan]

Recently I've been getting rather emotional, I'm either happy and content with myself, feeling like sad and having to cry and just plain lonely. Just so many emotions that I'm starting to find it a tad difficult to handle now. My emotions have been getting so intense that I'm simply not used to it. Honestly I've been very happy overall and I'm finally starting to feel complete on the inside for the first time in my life. I'm just simply not used to having such strong emotions.

Welcome to the moody club

[ZoeM]

In my case it was like everything got set on a hairpin trigger. One half-imagined comment, one minor conflict, and the tears start welling.

It's so strange, objectively, watching it happen. Also amazing. "Welcome to womanhood" is exactly right.

[bethany]

I would always cry over something that made me sad and that has not changed, but what has is crying over something that has made me happy. The first time that happened I was reading a news article about how a young girls parents had accepted her as being transgender and was allowing her to be true to herself. This touched me deeply and I had my first tears of joy.

The other thing is I have had people comment on how happy I have been since I started HRT. Even my dad sees a big difference in my mood and attitude. Yes I still get upset but I can better control my reaction to what set me off. I don't fly off the handle any more. Which is a very good thing.