Please do not self medicate. I did that and nearly wrecked my kidneys. It is too easy to obtain all sorts of drugs and medications over the internet. You have no way of knowing what it is doing to you, if the dosage is right, if the medications are suitable for your particular needs and so on.
It is not as scary as it seems going to a Doctor and saying, "I'm transgender'd." If your Doctor is professional they will help you find the resources you need, If they don't help you, you would not want them as a Doctor anyway.
I wish you the very best of luck and best wishes with your journey. I started mine in August 2010 and have just recently started shopping for a GRS Surgeon. So my journey is far from over. You will find there will be many ups and downs along the way. It is a very interesting journey.
I will be thinking of you, Hugs,
Jen