Starting transition without hope to pass ever

[Q]

There's dozens of reasons to transition, and just as many to not...everyone weighs these questions in their own, internalized "cost:benefit" scales...

There is no single correct answer, no "one size fits all" choice.

Imho

I agree with this.

It all depends... for example, if you lived in a country where not passing meant you were likely to be killed, you'd probably think differently to if you lived somewhere where a non passing trans person was accepted...

[Tristan]

Passing...who is the judge of passing? Yourself? your peers?

As far as age...it is a mixtuer of genetics...chance...and your mental strenght...

I do not mean to brag but I run the mile under 11 minutes, the 100 meter dash in 11 sec flat. I can take down 95% of the guys I run into..LOL

I look like I am in my early forties, with a full head of hair, no pot belly, no illness of any kind...I am still going to the University (where I also teach) for what would be my fith degree...I keep up with all the emerging technology and arts...I even keep up with the "youth lingo"  Cool Beans...I can put eight 0.45 bullets in a 6 inch circle at 50 yards...I speak many languages...so on so forth you get the idea...


Yes, chronologically I am in my fifties but when I climb in my duccatti Monster....well I am 14 all over again...Life is what you make out with what you are given...it is not bound  "age"

Finally, I pass becouse I say so!

your right. i was just saying if i didnt pass by others standards and had to worry about being beaten everytime i went out because of it in a small town i would not want to be me. and the military officer thing i just wish i could have done so i would have been able to retire. it would have been cool

[Jean24]

Consider this: you are a transsexual. Next logical step is to come out. But there is one problem:
you look male. After 50 years of testosterone you have hardly chance to pass ever.
Would you start trasition even if you have to consider to pass never ever?

That's a tough one because I'm 25 and my age has been weighing heavily on me. The earlier the transition the better from what I understand. However, I believe you can pass if you are dedicated enough though. If you get the required surgeries and therapies, if you are healthy, if you exercise, if it really will bring happiness, etc. I think you can get your body to a point where you will pass with anybody.

[Samantha Stone]

Yes of course.  My therapist brought a a good point.  Older men and women's looks tend to be  similar as they age.  Very different perspective after age 50 or 60.  Hopefully everyone will experience being older and accepting it.

Samantha

[warlockmaker]

i'm over 60 and being able to pass was critical in my decision to start HRT. I'm so lucky the years of Testosterone nave not had their toll on my physical make up and I can easily pass even now. I've been on HRT for 3 months and its the mental change that is amazing and what the male ego has fed you for all these years. Getting back to passing - You will be amazed at what cosmetic surgery can change if you are healthy and can afford it. Follow your dreams and good luck.

[Tristan]

I feel like those who go out and can't pass have lots of courage

[Ltl89]

I feel like those who go out and can't pass have lots of courage

I agree.  I have the upmost respect for people who are able to do this.  I'm not passing yet, but I'm young and hopefully will have a good response to hrt.  I just wish my damn hair would grow out faster (and would let me style it in different ways instead of always fighting me).  Still, I have difficulties going out before I feel passable.  I know this is not a healthy way to look at it, but passing is very important to me.  I have to admire those of you who have the inner strength to not care about the opinions of others.  I care deeply about what other's think of me.  Hell, I'm still terrified to show my face here,lol.  But I'm working hard to get over caring about what others think of me.   My therapist said it takes time to develop a thick skin, so hopefully one day I'll gain the same inner strength other's here have.

[Jen-from-IL]

I feel like those who go out and can't pass have lots of courage

I'm not sure if I have lots of courage. I am just fortunate in that I am confident in myself which people pick up on.

[Jess42]

I could answer this question as no, maybe and yes depending on different ages. In my twenties, when looks meant everything, mine and everyone elses, I would have said no. In my thirties when looks didn't mean quite so much and I really started seeing people beyond outer appearances, myself included, I would have answered maybe. Now that I am in my forties and can see way beyound the outer apperance and understand that true beauty isn't something we can see in the mirror but radiates from within, again myself included, now I have to say yes.

[kyh]

I'd transition anyways

[Tristan]

That's cool though. The ability to just transition and be like who cares what I look like or what people think of me is such a great attitude

[Nicolette]

If I didn't pass then I'd be someone else and that person would be giving you an answer, not me. How would I feel if the universe didn't exist?