I don't know if you'd be willing to read a blog on a site that's primarily devoted to castration, but I really did write a blog about my ENTIRE MtF HRT experience from the very beginning over on
Eunuch.org.
Here is the link:
http://www.eunuch.org/forums/showthread.php?24218-Cheetaking243-s-Official-Hormone-Trial!
Disclaimers:
-I was self-medicating when I started. I am NOT advocating doing the same, for reasons that will become very apparent later in the blog when I go through an EXTREME freakoutish depressive bout over what my hormone levels are. (And if admins want to delete this link due to that reason, I understand. There's a reason why I have never cross-posted this blog into these forums, because I know a lot of the posts that I wrote would not be welcome here due to self-medication talk.)
-I was NOT 100% sure that I was indeed transsexual when I started. I started hormones as a "1-month trial" where I was taking them looking for some form of self-validation of my trans desires. It wasn't until around the 2-month mark, when I started therapy, that I really was 100% sure. So my experience is probably WAY different than everyone else's. Everyone else starts hormones as the final step toward becoming the gender identity that they know for sure on the inside. I started hormones looking for validation of that identity.
-My moods in these blogs are probably WAY more chaotic up-and-down than what they would be for the average trans-girl, because again, I was using hormones as a means of seeking self-validation. So every single time I felt awesome it snowballed into uber-happiness because I thought it validated my trans desires, and every single time I didn't feel awesome, I completely freaked out because I didn't want it to mean that hormones weren't right for me. So be forewarned, you probably won't go through half of the emotional ups and downs that I did.
