Angie, I know how the family thing goes. I am part of the indie-pop/twee/lo-fi scene, and there is also quite a bit of Riot GRRL (the feminist punk part of me) in me as well. I like alot of the politics of punk, and the DIY ethic, its just not my taste in music, so I went to the next closest thing, something that mirrored my girly sensibility and love of pretty music. You know, one of those K-Punk Calvinist kids (you have been around long enough to know exactly what I am talking about). I am part of the family known as the international pop underground. Kids who start up collective micro-labels with their friends in basements and attics. I could go on, you probably know my scene just as well as I know the punk scene.
There are not to many of us either, we are a small group of people who strangely enough know each other even when we don't. I am still part of the community, and honestly my transition is not going to change it. But it also a big reason I could never go stealth, it would involve leaving my true home and my true family, something I love to dearly and has been a huge support system for me. The one thing I could hang onto.
Sorry, tear in my eye.
I may not have my birth family anymore, but I will always have the music community that has been close to my heart for the last decade.
By the way, as much as I don't like punk music, I love most punk kids (in the music scene we are all kids, no matter the age).
I know this is off topic. But nothing wrong with being punk. Real punk kids have an extended family that I completely grasp. When I go to punk shows, I feel like I am visiting my older cousins. (Even when they are younger in age.)
People who are not part of these communities do not grasp why they are so important, the music is only part of it, the sense of family is much more important. The fact that we have a personal connection with our music, the fact that the community is more than the music, its a great big sub-cultural family.
The thing is these are the best places to transition, because these music communities, are the least likely to judge you in my experience. They value people for their differences and their quirks. There are fewer rifts in the punk and twee communities than in the queer community which is deeply divided. It is probably a big reason why I have kept so many friends and why my friends have been so supportive of my transition.
