I don't know what to do please help

[Aaronaslan]

I would appreciate it so much if someone could help me out with this I don't know what to do. So here's the situation, I've been on testosterone injection for seven months now and although the monthly terror has stopped I still get these random bouts of intense cramps. I am going to visit a gyn soon and I am almost positive that she will find some sort of abnormality. My problem comes in because I plan on getting hysterectomy but I don't want my parents to find out. I am still on their insurance I am 19 almost 20 and I live apart from them, but if I use the insurance for the surgery with they find out I've had the procedure? My mother is strongly against my transition and to be honest I'm kind of scare of her. Though I've been using the insurance for my shots for the past 7 months and she hasn't kicked me off the insurance yet I'm afraid that a hysto would push her over the top with her only female born child not having kids and what not. I can't afford the surgery out of pocket with they for sure find out if I use the insurance?

[Jamie D]

Are you in college?  Do you have access to student health insurance?

[Aaronaslan]

I was planning on starting collage after I can get my gender marker changed right now all I do is work and try to save for top surgery

[Adam (birkin)]

I obviously am not a doctor but I do know that these cramps are quite common. Particularly as my period wavered off I did get cramps quite often. It doesn't necessarily mean there is an abnormality, but it's good that you're getting it checked out just to be safe. I would just try not to worry until then.

Do your parents know that you're trans? If there is an abnormality you could always tell your mom "the doctor found something wrong with X and they want me to have a hysterectomy." She doesn't have to know it's hormone-related.

[CalmRage]

I would appreciate it so much if someone could help me out with this I don't know what to do. So here's the situation, I've been on testosterone injection for seven months now and although the monthly terror has stopped I still get these random bouts of intense cramps. I am going to visit a gyn soon and I am almost positive that she will find some sort of abnormality. My problem comes in because I plan on getting hysterectomy but I don't want my parents to find out. I am still on their insurance I am 19 almost 20 and I live apart from them, but if I use the insurance for the surgery with they find out I've had the procedure? My mother is strongly against my transition and to be honest I'm kind of scare of her. Though I've been using the insurance for my shots for the past 7 months and she hasn't kicked me off the insurance yet I'm afraid that a hysto would push her over the top with her only female born child not having kids and what not. I can't afford the surgery out of pocket with they for sure find out if I use the insurance?

Do you want your mom to be happy or yourself? It might turn into a serious problem for you later.

[Aaronaslan]

Yes I've already come out to my family as transgender bit my mom chooses to ignor it and said she doesn't want any part of it.

Of course I am willing to do what ever I have to do in the end to complete my transition regardless of what my mom thinks or wants and although I live on my own and I pay her for my portion of the cell  phone bill, car insurance, I am afraid if she retaliates and cuts all ties I will not be able to afford these things on my own plan and most of all my own health insurance plan

[Robert Scott]

Legally speaking the insurance company cannot tell your parent what you are having done or that your even having surgery due to HIPAA.  However, I know that when I just had mine done the insurance company sent me some letter before hand talking about the procedure and what was covered and how much I had to pay out of pocket.  So, if your mom is likely to open letter from the insurance company even if they are addressed to you then she will know

[spring0721]

Aaron,

To answer your actual question, yes she most likely will receive a statement in the mail showing that it was paid(it normally gives the detail of how much was paid by health insurance, how much the doctor or health care facility had to write off, and then how much is the participants portion to cover). So, if it's your moms health plan and you are on it, I donkt see a way around that. With that being said, if your doctor says that a hysto is medically necessary then it most likely is to ensure your continued good health and safety; hopefully your mom will be able to see that. Also, I agree with the previous posters...this is your life, you need to make yourself happy. Besides once you've had the surgery even if she receives the statement from insurance it will be too late anyway and at least you will have had the surgery. I say go for it. Good luck!