People who don't understand

[Larisa]

I hate when people tell me it's impossible for me to think or know what it's like to be a girl. They try to make it fact like its chemically not possible. It's so ignorant. I've been partly a girl in my head all my life but stayed a boy for certain reasons meaning no surgery or such but I'm a girl inside half ways. To tell me I can't think like a girl is so offensive to me. I've done certain things to my body to be girly like my hair but just because I look like a boy basically doesn't mean I am totally boy. Disgusting ignorence and call it on science is wrong.

[mrs izzy]

I hate when people tell me it's impossible for me to think or know what it's like to be a girl. They try to make it fact like its chemically not possible. It's so ignorant. I've been partly a girl in my head all my life but stayed a boy for certain reasons meaning no surgery or such but I'm a girl inside half ways. To tell me I can't think like a girl is so offensive to me. I've done certain things to my body to be girly like my hair but just because I look like a boy basically doesn't mean I am totally boy. Disgusting ignorence and call it on science is wrong.

I found it is hard for anyone who does not feel our way can understand. There is nothing you can say to them that they can wrap there minds around. Sometimes i bring Religion into things being most can understand that. Religion is an organized collection of beliefs (this is true there is nothing other then a inside belief) It is also based on spirituality feelings inside (this is also true with any Religion being there is only a book and again just a feeling inside)  so ask them if they belive in God and if they do why can you not feel or belive you have a feeling that your mind does not match your body.

Its hard, i kinda gave up on trying to make anyone understand, heck i stopped myself working on the why.

Good luck, just stay true to yourself and not worry what the nay sayers say.

Izzy

[Kaitlin4475]

I tried explaining it to my wife and she says that she kinda gets it but I don't think she truely understands what it really feels like to be trans and have these kind of feelings

[Kaelin]

While there is no substitute for "total immersion," people outside of that experience are nevertheless capable of having a drive (whether through a female identity or an intense interest for other reasons) to have an understanding of womanhood, an understanding that possesses its own set of weaknesses and strengths.  The "bio girl" experience is also not universal, as not all of them have had babies, have undergone puberty (not surprising for the ones still under the age of 10), or have been treated in the same ways both good and bad (coming from religion, social class, location, the individuals in their lives, and good ol' chance), so cis-women can have the false idea than other cis-women are going to be able to necessarily relate to their own experiences (and this same principle applies to any other demographic... TGs aren't immune, either).  There is going to be a great correlation between understanding womanhood and being a cis-woman, but correlation is not an absolute -- and you're the sort of person outside of the cis-female group who is going to be much more aware than the average about what it means to be a woman, and I bet in some (maybe many) ways you know more about womanhood than the average woman.

If a cis-woman basically "pulls rank" and refuses to explain in any educational detail where her perspective is coming from, then she can go suck an egg.  If you can extract a more substantial conversation with a back-and-forth, then a greater understanding is possible, maybe where each of you can teach the other a few things (you offering your earnest and insightful observations even while not able to fully participate, while she may illuminate certain nuances you have been unable to see for yourself).  The key is that it isn't supposed to be a competition, but rather an opportunity to gain understanding.  If the person you are talking to has merit, then trying to engage them to really discuss things should give better results.  If they just boast, they're probably too proud or insecure (some can't handle being "out-womaned" by someone who isn't a cis-woman) to be worth your time.

[JillSter]

One of the first things I said to my therapist was, "obviously I don't what it feels like to be a woman, but..."

But honestly, I don't know what it feels like to be a man either.

I only know what it feels like to be me, and I have a hard time to putting myself in either catagory since I obviously don't fit either one fully.

[Northern Jane]

I only know what it feels like to be me, and I have a hard time to putting myself in either catagory since I obviously don't fit either one fully.

WOW! There is a tremendous wisdom in that statement!

As a child and a youngster, as much as I felt I SHOULD have been a girl because my nature, my development, and my interests were so much more closely aligned with those of other girls, I did not know what  it felt like to be a girl because I wasn't one.

In my teens, when I began living part time as a girl, going out as a girl, and experiencing life as a girl, I had a better idea of what it was like to BE a girl and that suited me much better than the nondescript life as neither completely one nor the other.

Even at the time of transition/SRS (age 24), I still did not know what it was like to BE a girl so I dove in with the conviction to LEARN what it meant to be a woman and by immersion I slowly began to learn about life as a woman.

In retrospect, feeling that "I should have been a girl" was only a very small hint of what being a woman was all about, but, in the beginning, that is all we have to go on. The more  you can immerse yourself in the world of women, the more you will learn about yourself and about being a woman in general.

[Ltl89]

I hate when people tell me it's impossible for me to think or know what it's like to be a girl. They try to make it fact like its chemically not possible. It's so ignorant. I've been partly a girl in my head all my life but stayed a boy for certain reasons meaning no surgery or such but I'm a girl inside half ways. To tell me I can't think like a girl is so offensive to me. I've done certain things to my body to be girly like my hair but just because I look like a boy basically doesn't mean I am totally boy. Disgusting ignorence and call it on science is wrong.

I didn't know you've been talking to my family,lol. 

It's frustrating, but it seems to be a common statement.  I just tell people that I know what it's like to be me, and I happen to identify as female.  What's the big deal?  To them, everything.  Oh well, here's to a future with less ignorant beliefs.   

[Chrissygirl6218]

You can pick any topic in the world and you will find haters and know-it-all blowhards. You know who and why you are who you are and are confident in you decisions, therefore there is no need to partake in the insanity of having these kinds of people living in your head without rent. Walk tall and as you walk by these people, pray for them, because they are the ones with a problem! May God bless you!