1. HRT alters the fat distribution on the face, so it should soften your jaw line, round out face, etc but it will not alter bone structure. (I'm assuming that you have already been through a bit of male puberty)
2. You probably won't notice many of the effects until others notice. Seeing yourself in the mirror everyday makes it difficult to see the slow changes. For the first week, I would stare at myself in the mirror to see if i noticed any changes. Haha. The ones that you should be able to notice early on would be softer/clearer skin and nipple/breast development, but when you notice them is not set in stone. My results may be different than yours.
3. Others will probably ignore most of the changes as it is not their first guess that you are on HRT. They'll probably ignore them at first. Your results may vary but I've seen people with noticeable change at three months in and others at one year in. It all depends on age and genetics. Also, family that hasn't seen you in a while will also probably notice a large change, at least mine have.
4. Some therapists will write you a referral when they feel comfortable doing so, even if it is only one visit, while most others strictly follow the WPATH standards of care and take about three months before writing a referel. It's worth the weight though. Starting HRT is like finally getting your driver's license. It's a long ride getting there, but when you do. It's 100% worth it.
Anyways, if you have anymore questions, just message me. Good luck on your journey!
