physical changes even without T?

[YBtheOutlaw]

okay this post might sound gross but i really need some help.

i'm an FTM and i'm 18 yrs old. i attained puberty as a girl when i was 11, but menstruation only started after i was 12. i realized that i was a weirdo by the time i was 13 and due to the lack of social awareness i hadn't known what actually was wrong with me until i was 17 and browsed the internet for help. i've never had T, worn binders or done anything else for the transition except for slight crossdressing and i haven't even come out. i have a few questions.

1.there was this girl who came to our school when i was 14 and i kinda liked her. after associating her for a few months i realized that i was in love with her. her sight, touch, voice, smell and everything dazzled me and i wanted so badly to have her. when she came too close to me i got very nervous and excited, my heartbeat rises, my skin heats up, i get a tingling feeling around my pubic area and so on. is it possible for an FTM to fall in love with a girl and have such physical responses even without any treatments?

2.i get this tingling feeling, sometimes almost a burning sensation in my pubic area, actually around my clitoris and the two lobes beside it (i dunno their medical name) when i get sexually aroused(maybe 'aroused' is too harsh, 'provoken' or 'stimulated' maybe) as a guy, and my pants get wet after that. it really stinks and i'm wondering if it's coming from vagina. sometimes if i go to the bathroom immediately after such and event i've observed that it's a thick whitish, sometimes transparent fluid. what on earth could that be? is it natural to have such secretions from female organs when you are provoked as a male?

3.menstruation kinda occurred quite orderly, but sometimes not very well timed, but a fair amount of blood went out when i was younger. the amount of blood lost reduced around last year and now, it's been quite a few months since i last had periods. is this because i'm an FTM? is it possible for such things to occur even without T?

i'm really confused. if there's somebody out there who knows about these stuff please help me. i have nowhere else to look for help

[LordKAT]

First, Welcome to Susan's.

Now to your concerns.

Being turned on by someone can lead to the tingling and fluids you describe. The gender of the person you were attracted to makes no difference.

Who you are attracted to does not in anyway relate to being FTM. What does matter is how you see yourself. Do you feel that you are a man or woman? Are you comfortable seeing yourself addressed and treated as a man? Do female things bother you? This has more to do with FTM than who sets off your sexual feelings.

Periods are not timely in early puberty and can take a few years to straighten out. The fact that you have not had one in a few months bears looking into. That also would have nothing to do with being FTM. It could be due to many factors including diet or strenuous exercise as well as hormone levels or  ovarian cysts.

My suggestion is that you try to find a therapist to work out how you feel and how to deal with those feelings regarding who you are. I would also suggest having a physical regarding the stopped periods.

As you are 18 but still in school, you would need to use your parents insurance or use cash to access services. Most parents would have no problem with a physical for the periods and if you aren't comfortable telling them why you want a therapist, tell them you want one due to depression or stress at school. The therapist can't legally tell your parents the reason for the visit.

Your school may have some resources such as a counselor or even a psychiatrist.

Good luck with your choices and let us know how things work out.

[Soren]

2.i get this tingling feeling, sometimes almost a burning sensation in my pubic area, actually around my clitoris and the two lobes beside it (i dunno their medical name) when i get sexually aroused(maybe 'aroused' is too harsh, 'provoken' or 'stimulated' maybe) as a guy, and my pants get wet after that. it really stinks and i'm wondering if it's coming from vagina. sometimes if i go to the bathroom immediately after such and event i've observed that it's a thick whitish, sometimes transparent fluid. what on earth could that be? is it natural to have such secretions from female organs when you are provoked as a male?

Female bodies can produce lubrication when aroused. It's the biological equivalent to ky. It's normal, don't worry. Just wipe it out with a tissue and throw it in the toilet.