Introduction
I've been visiting the site for a while and have posted few times, but haven't really introduced myself. I was previously going by Audrey, but after hearing my gender therapist call me by that name for a session I decided that I didn't actually like the sound of it. While thinking of new names, I thought it would be funny to change my name from [birth name] to Eve, but I decided Evelyn really fits. It also has that smooth phonetic flow that I was looking for.
Gender dysphoria has been present for most of my life, but it wasn't until a couple years ago that I realized I might be transgender, and more importantly, that transition was possible. Growing up in a small, rural town, I didn't have the most accurate view of minorities, let alone transsexuals. Even though I wanted desperately to be a girl, I shrugged off a "sex change" because it I thought it wouldn't be good enough. Two years ago, I hit a breaking point in my dysphoria that led to research about transition and learning all that I could about the process.
Since finding all of this out, I had some trouble fully accepting the simple truth that I am transgender. I tried to repress the feelings, and just live as male. I went through the process of cutting my growing hair, throwing away clothes, and attempting to erase that part of me more than once over the past two years. The feelings never really leave, but when they come back they're stronger than before and the regret at my attempts to repress them has been pretty intense. After going through that enough times, I'm happy to say that I'm finally moving forward both on my own and with the help of a gender therapist. I'm aiming to start HRT in the fall.
Being trans is a big part of my life for now, but only a fraction of who I am. I'm an artist; I love to create in video, photography, music, and I'm getting back into writing fiction for the page. I'm a cyclist. I have a passion for gourmet mac & cheese and craft beer, but not usually all in one sitting. I like books. I wanted to make a really cool list, but I can't think of anything else.
- Evelyn
