monthly pain etc.

[Taka]

umm...

well, i'm kind of forcing myself to write this. i really don't want to talk about it, i'd rather not even admit it happens. but it does. and i have some problems with. now i figured is a good time to at least try to talk to someone about it, i've never done so for the fifteen years i've experienced it, at least not in detail or about the very practical side of it. i really need to complain and ask for info/advice from people who might understand what i'm talking about.

i don't think i can handle this monthly thing any more. not because of the red stuff, but because of all the emotional and physical pain that follows. when i was young, i didn't have any problems with it, simply because i never noticed it in any other way than what i could see when i went to the toilet. that part of it still doesn't bother me at all, it's easily hidden from anyone's sight.

but, i made the mistake of trying a relationship with a guy, believing i was a girl and the reasons i was unhappy were related to very different things than what i think now. i used the pill for a while, and apparently that messed up something. it didn't get fixed after experiencing pregnancy and childbirth either.

every other month, i experience pain that is severe enough that i'm afraid of touching myself in the middle area between my navel and knees, though only for a few hours. even so, i'd never tell anyone why i'm just sitting there on the sofa, staring blankly into nothingness, or have secluded myself to a rather dark office. though i suppose i could survive that, i found out that painkillers help after i admitted to myself that it is a problem and i need to deal with it a little more smartly than i've done up till not so long ago.

but still. even if i could handle those aspects of it, i can't handle the mood swings i experience before, and the digestion problems and stomach ache i have during the week. and the fatigue and near headaches in the last couple days before it happens. they make me feel like a horrible person, pitiful, worthless, like anding things, or just not caring about the consequences and just take the step of lying myself to a solution that i don't want (full transition through nhs). the other solution would be to try the pill again, i'm sure the doctors would tell me it's a good idea.


but, i really want to ask you guys for advice, or just your own experience. how does different kinds of hormone treatment affect these kinds of problems? and what side effects did you like or hate? i'm convinced that my problem is hormonal, so i think i'll start to desperately seek out hormone treatment for this, but i really want to know a little more about the alternatives from guys who have experience with different things. especially related to the pill and low dose t, i'm not sure i'm up to transitioning too fast. not right now, maybe in the future, but...

i'm just full of uncertainty and doubt right now.

[LordKAT]

I had the same issues, almost exactly.  T eased it but I found out that some of it was caused from endometriosis and that was cause enough to get a hysto paid for by insurance. Needless to say, I got that hysto real quick.

[Taka]

that's a scary possibility... which means i need to get it checked out just in case. it would give me an excuse for weird things if that's the cause, but i hope it isn't. i don't like the thought of anything being in the wrong place in my body. how did the hysto work for the symptoms, compared to only hormones?

[LordKAT]

Like magic, all symptoms were gone! T only eased them.

[Taka]

okay, i'll be talking to a doctor about this. maybe not all at once, but at least finding a solution that works for me. i both want and don't want hysto, but if that thing is only going to cause me pains for many years to come, i'll consider it for other than just trans reasons. after talking to a doctor and hopefully getting to try other solutions first.

but i think i'd like to see a couple more answers here as well. just so i know what it is i should talk to my doctor about. i don't trust them too much, so i won't won't enter an office uneducated.

[LordKAT]

Smart thinking there. I can only tell you how things worked out for me.

[ford]

I had bad endometriosis too, which I managed reasonably well with birth control pills. I've been off those pills about 6 months now, and on T for 4.

The red death itself is gone, but I do still get occasional pain (pretty bad pain actually, lasting a few hours a day for a few days a month). I really don't know what else to do about it, except maybe live with it. I had a laproscopy done a few years ago that cleared some of the tissue out, but that was just a temporary fix. I'm almost certain my health insurance won't cover a hysto.

Just yesterday I was curled up on the floor writhing in pain, and even knowing I'd feel better in a few hours wasn't very helpful. Wish I had some advice, this issue is a big one for me. If nothing else, talk to a doctor (obviously). I'd be interested to hear what you figure out/decide.

[LordKAT]

Ford,

Insurance paid for a friends hysto at age 19 due to pain from endometriosis. It would be worth it to talk to your doctor about it.

[Taka]

I had bad endometriosis too, which I managed reasonably well with birth control pills. I've been off those pills about 6 months now, and on T for 4.

i'm wondering if birth control pills somehow wither caused or delayed the pain. i don't know, but i never had any pain before using them.
disregarding the pain, how was is to be on the pill compared to being on t? i'm probably thinking about moods and how comfortable you were with your feelings or something.

i also think you should talk to a doctor about hysto. when i looked it up, it turns out this is a very common procedure, performed on around one in ten women in norway. probably covered by social security here, since so many get it.