Greetings

[anjaq]

Hi.
I am more than 10 years post op and from Europe.
What I do like to talk about here is for once maybe some talk about social issues, eg Dealing with Feminists (male and female) who think that transpeople are not legitimate, but mostly I want to talk about more solid issues. The main thing Is already rather private but it is about long term post op vaginal contraction issues - e.g. long term dilation etc. Didnt have a relationship in a long time and seem to have some serious trouble now with vibrators and such as I get pain and even some bleeding when using them unless they are of rather small size. I would like to get tips on how to resolve this such a long time post op.
Greetings

[Devlyn]

Hi Anjaq, welcome to Susan's Place! I'm from Boston. We're a support site, talk about transgender people not being legitimate isn't welcome here, so be careful what you post. Here's the complete rundown on our rules:

• Site Terms of Service and rules to live by
  
• Standard Terms and Definitions
  
• Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar)
  
• Age and the Forum
  
• Reputation rules
  
• Photo, avatars, and signature images policy
  

See you around the site, hugs, Devlyn

[Ms. OBrien CVT]

Hi Anjaq,

Welcome to our little family. Over 7330. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister.


Janet  )O(

[Kara]

Hello and welcome.

[anjaq]

Hi Anjaq, welcome to Susan's Place! I'm from Boston. We're a support site, talk about transgender people not being legitimate isn't welcome here, so be careful what you post. Here's the complete rundown on our rules:

Thank you for the warning. It is an issue I was recently again confronted with, so I was wondering if it would be ok to talk about how to deal with such situations. Namely there are events, mostly connected to feminism (something which I am really in favour of and actively participated in events to bring forward), which do not allow transsexual women to enter sleeping areas, bathrooms or even the event itself because the organizers and a portion of the participants do not accept transsexuality as a reality. I think this is a great loss for them and franky it is something I dont think is legitimate and hurting people. I would be really bugged out being denied access to a sleeping place on such an occasion and think there is a need to have discussions in such circles that make clear that transsexuality is not "just" about gender roles and that it especially is not about people born as "male" trying to dig deeply into stereotypical female roles for some odd reason. Personally I am not doing this an dI think many others are not either. I am filling in parts of the male and the female social roles, but this is not what I think defines gender, but some people seem to think that this is it. Here is an article that bugged me immensely for example despite me liking that author normally: http://www.counterpunch.org/2013/06/21/55123/ .
Ok - not wanting to start a discussion here, I stop now before knowing what topics can be discussed here and what not.

If there can be a discussion on such stuff, which would be the correct subforum? Which subforum would be appropriate to ask about the more medical issues I have with the long term post-op stuff?

Another question - will all posts in all subforums be visible to anyone in the internet? Just to know how "private" a post would be and how much one has to rephrase the content to not get too much into detail

Thank you for having me here.

[Devlyn]

In general, hate found on other sites can be left on the other sites, we specialize in support, this is not the battleground.

There is a Post-op forum for your questions and discussions.

The open forums are exactly that, open. Many people find their way here through internet searches. The private areas and Subscriber section are not internet searchable.

Hugs, Devlyn

[Jamie D]

Welcome anjaq.  Thanks for joining.

I understand the feeling of being rejected for who you are.  It is entirely unfair, but I think those who try to diminish us, are beginning themselves to be called out for the biases and discrimination.

We have a Discrimination Forum here, which would be a good place to start.  I am sorry that people who should be allies are instead oppressors.

As Devlyn was saying (above), there is upsetting and infuriating stupidity found on some 2nd wave feminist blogs, like that by the deeply disturbed "Bug" Brennan, that we just don't bring on here.

[anjaq]

Ok thanks, so I guess discrimination issues do have this subforum but as I understand it it should be kept to definite experiences, for example if I was to go to one of these events and be rejected and not so much discussion on such issues in general. I am asking this a bit because I participated in organizing a feminist event once and had interest in other groups - in the first case I had with some others a hard time but finally managed to get acceptance of trans people to be allowed to enter the event which was declared "women only" (interestingly they had less issues with ftm's). In the second case I was digging on granite with arguments about how women with trans past are still male because they were born that way and socialized that way until transition and thus never can get rid of that influence and privilege. Sigh. They did not get that this socialization failed and that the privilege was given up voluntarily with transition.

Anyways, I guess I will concentrate more on the more physical/medical post op issues for now, as they probably will be less controversial - plus some chitchat - didnt talk to trans people in a long while except a very good RL friend who just recently de-transitioned O.O which I found confusing...

I noticed that many members here seem to be before transition or surgery or not that long post-op. Does the old rule from 15 years ago still hold that long term post-ops usually do not participate a lot in forums like this? Or do you have a decent number of long termers like me in here? Well 15 years transition and 13 years post op is not that long term as it could be, but for now I consider it long term

I hope I may also help some people, though I have to admit that I am not up to date in many of the current procedures, my knowledge base is a bit old, but I can maybe say one or two things about post op life in general

Greetings