When do I start looking feminine

[kathyk]

Started prescription HRT on July 12, 2012 (stupidly self medicating).  Then on September 11, 2012 I was given the approval by an endo to continue my illicit  HRT as he sent a scipt to the pharmacy for quality controlled meds.  However there were also years of over-the-counter meds and herbals (this caused some cosmetic health issues and weight gain).

So the question for you  is;  When the h... do I start actually looking more feminine and not just kind of androgynous?   Been full time since June 9, and I never hesitate to go anywhere, but there are constant stares and comments. 

Example - About two weeks ago we went to the local Casino on a Saturday night, but a lot of younger drunk males there  made extremely rude comments to each other after they noticed me.  And as happens from time to time, a few made sure a lot of other customers could hear their crude and obsene words.  Now don't misunderstand, I am used to this and it hasn't changed my ability or need to be the woman I am.  But it points out how far from feminine my appearance is. 


Hey.  I'm am not upset, and at times it's really funny to see peoples reactions.  But I'm not transitioning to have people react to me.      You can see me at my best in this avatar, and yeah, that's my absolute best.   And to stay at my best I always wear makeup now except for when I've got a lot of heavy construction to do on my house.  At least  I found a few more men, and a greater number of women have begun to talk to me no matter how I look.  Maybe that's progress, but it's not assimilation.

K

[A]

If your HRT dosages and blood levels are good, you should, soon. If your  appearance gets better but you still get comments and weird looks, then perhaps there is another factor. Adam's apple? Voice? Clothing style? Hair? Facial hair? Height? The way you act and move? Sexual orientation in a very homophobic city/place? I'm just throwing some random stuff, but you see what I mean. Someone who would otherwise pass quite well can absolutely ruin everything with just a few wrong (or wrong-to-whoever-is-doing-the-weird-looks) details.

[Katie]

Being a woman has more to do with what goes on in your head than what you look like on the outside. The fact that one asks this question brings me to the suggestion that you might consider what your feeling and thinking. If those are aligned as a woman then your probably not going to be asking yourself if you look like a woman.

Katie

[Beth Andrea]

She didn't say she doesn't feel like a woman...she said she doesn't look enough like one.

Now don't misunderstand, I am used to this and it hasn't changed my ability or need to be the woman I am.  But it points out how far from feminine my appearance is. 

So, to the OP:

It depends on several things, starting point, length of time on legit HRT, genes...and age.

I've been on HRT for a year and a half, still look mostly like a guy, but with faint edges of femininity beginning to show. (I'm 49, fwiw). Makeup helps a LOT, but remember "less is more."

I get so jealous of the TS's who pass as attractive women even before HRT and makeup! They're blessed with a great set of genes...but there's nothing I can do about mine...so I stay patient, saving money (for FFS), and take care of my body (no hard labor, sunscreen, lotion for soft skin, etc)...

But, in the end...one gets what one gets. Just keep on not letting the jerks get you down.

*hugs*

[Kelly-087]

its taken me way longer than I wanted it too!

But I think some of that is attributed to age.. Im 24. My body resisted AAs until we pushed it up to the maximum dose..

And more recently its become a lot of cases of - people not knowing what gender I am.

Edit: its been about 5 months on even considerable doseage for E (still pretty low, my doctors been really careful.) and 9 months on AAs (had some E before that, but ineffective delivery.)

[RosieD]

When the h... do I start actually looking more feminine and not just kind of androgynous?

Being slightly facetious I would have to say at least two hours longer than you wished but definitely at least two seconds before you absolutely need to.

Rosie

[kathyk]

Well, thank you for the replies.  I'll take it from the top, and then give you a scary pic.

....  Adam's apple? Voice? .... Hair?  Facial hair?  Height? .... Sexual orientation in a very homophobic city/place?

Yes A.  These fit my situation and maybe some do draw more attention.  Adam's apple: kind of hidden by drooping skin   Voice: not too good    Hair:  lost a lot but growing some back    Height: 5'-10" & 200# not good    Sexual Orientation: Lesbian.  This is an incredibly conservative area that's nothing like California and lesbians are not liked.  Especially super old transgender lesbians.

Being a woman has more to do with what goes on in your head than what you look like on the outside. ...

My head has it right, but the mirror doesn't  .  Really, I'm very happy with my journey now, and I can't imagine how I survived more than 60 years the way I was.

It depends on several things, starting point, length of time on legit HRT, genes...and age.  ....

But, in the end...one gets what one gets. Just keep on not letting the jerks get you down.

That's it.  I may not be a great looker, but I went back to a few of my grandparents pics.  The gene pool for me is pretty harsh.  lol.

Only 2 months on full HRT for me, although I took Spiro for a very long time (1+ year) at a low diuretic-level dose.  .....

I won't go into the meds I took in the past because it wasn't a wise set of decisions on my part.  Plus some of it was terribly dangerous and I wouldn't want anyone to know about those drugs or take them the way I did.

But, I will say the AA's caused extra breast growth over a long period.  And so along with gynecomastia I think there was a bit of an advantage when HRT began.  Too bad it didn't fix my face.

... And more recently its become a lot of cases of - people not knowing what gender I am. ...

You sound like you're doing well so far, even if your doctor is on the conservative side.  At 24 I saw my first psychiatrist who told me to ignore my feelings and live my life as a normal man, or suffer terrible consequences (paraphrased).  So with fear and dysphoria I failed to be me for 37 more years.  Wow girl, times have changed.  Hugs.

Being slightly facetious I would have to say at least two hours longer than you wished but definitely at least two seconds before you absolutely need to.

Thanks Rosie.     Needed a chuckle just as you posted.


Ok.  Now for the scare.  This is the way I looked at the of April, 2012.  It was taken a few months earlier but I hadn't changed any by April.

[Teela Renee]

For me it took about 11 months of  HRT done by my endo. I never self medicated. It also depends on your body, age, and estrogen to Testosterone levels.  If your seeing the same Endo I was when I lived in your area, its gonna be a slow process. He was extremely conservative with the amount of meds he would prescribe.

having seen your before and after.  You do look very good *hugs*  you'll get to that happy place your looking for just have faith and be patient.

[justpat]

   You already do it will just take some more time. I have my first endo appointment on Nov 5 2013 and I am 63 and just starting.Hope to find peace in the end.PM if you would like a before picture.
  Drunks are drunks and are obnoxious no matter what age I happen to know quite a few and they are nice till they start then I leave.  Pat

[kathyk]

   You already do it will just take some more time. I have my first endo appointment on Nov 5 2013 and I am 63 and just starting.

Thank you Pat, you made my evening. And I was just about to go to bed when I checked in. 
Congratulations on the upcoming appointment.  Starting HRT is such a boost.  Some of it is placebo, and so much is real.  Can't wait till I hear your updates around Thanksgiving and into December. 

Take care.

K.

[KatelynRain]

Kathy, I actually think you have one of the better profile pictures here.  I wouldn't have doubted you were female for a second if I saw you like that in person.   You look great, and I'm not just saying that!  And i'm sure you'll look even better as time goes on (:

[kathyk]

Kathy, I actually think you have one of the better profile pictures here.  I wouldn't have doubted you were female for a second if I saw you like that in person.   You look great, and I'm not just saying that!  And i'm sure you'll look even better as time goes on (:

Why thank you Katelyn.  Another few years will tell. 

I got nothing but supportive comments here on Susan's, and from a couple girls in my therapy group back in California.  And with a new attitude last Sunday night, I'm now going places without question.  I just go out convinced I'm looking feminine.

[LilDevilOfPrada]

I also once got fool by all the overly pretty girls here at Susans but over 2 years on HRT now and I dont look feminine, I guess its luck of the draw.

Annah used to tell me 1 year should tell you if youll be feminine in the face from HRT so I guess at 1 year.

[A]

Ya know, if at your age you don't have satisfactory results at this point, there's a >99 % chance that one or both of these are heavily implied:

- Major distorsion of self image
- Inappropriate dosages or medication

[drgabriellaprice]

Started prescription HRT on July 12, 2012 (stupidly self medicating).  Then on September 11, 2012 I was given the approval by an endo to continue my illicit  HRT as he sent a scipt to the pharmacy for quality controlled meds.  However there were also years of over-the-counter meds and herbals (this caused some cosmetic health issues and weight gain).

So the question for you  is;  When the h... do I start actually looking more feminine and not just kind of androgynous?   Been full time since June 9, and I never hesitate to go anywhere, but there are constant stares and comments. 

Example - About two weeks ago we went to the local Casino on a Saturday night, but a lot of younger drunk males there  made extremely rude comments to each other after they noticed me.  And as happens from time to time, a few made sure a lot of other customers could hear their crude and obsene words.  Now don't misunderstand, I am used to this and it hasn't changed my ability or need to be the woman I am.  But it points out how far from feminine my appearance is. 


Hey.  I'm am not upset, and at times it's really funny to see peoples reactions.  But I'm not transitioning to have people react to me.      You can see me at my best in this avatar, and yeah, that's my absolute best.   And to stay at my best I always wear makeup now except for when I've got a lot of heavy construction to do on my house.  At least  I found a few more men, and a greater number of women have begun to talk to me no matter how I look.  Maybe that's progress, but it's not assimilation.

K

They're looking at you 'cause you're pretty!

[kathyk]

Ya know, if at your age you don't have satisfactory results at this point, there's a >99 % chance that one or both of these are heavily implied:

- Major distorsion of self image
- Inappropriate dosages or medication

I had stalled out from too low a dose, and finally switched to a doctor who immediately raised my E to a proper level.  Amazing difference with soft skin returning, and GID disappearing again.  So for me it must be self image.  At least I can change that myself.

They're looking at you 'cause you're pretty!

Pretty?  Thank you for saying such a nice thing.  I'll try to keep that in mind. 

[anjaq]

Depending on what you DIYd and how long it may be that you already had some of the effects but did not notice them. In your profile picture I think you look quite good, so I can imagine that you are underestimating the real effects.

[A]

I had stalled out from too low a dose, and finally switched to a doctor who immediately raised my E to a proper level.  Amazing difference with soft skin returning, and GID disappearing again.  So for me it must be self image.  At least I can change that myself.

Oh uhm. Sorry. I was actually talking to LilDevilOfPrada, the post above mine.

[Renee]

It took a few years for me to really start looking more feminine in the face and I started around 40 years of age.