need advice about social anxiety

[Natkat]

I think a couple of people here on Susan deals with Depression or Anxiety so there should be someone out there to give some advice.
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Laterly I got pretty depressive and anxious. it kinda started few monts ago. I where dealing with alot of activism and got some pretty nasty hate message on me which in the end made my whole body shiver and made it hard just to go outside without feeling unconfortable. at that time I had a pretty sweet boss who understood so I got to talk about it and manage to show up step by step and end the course I was doing with good statements.

Now it kinda blushed up alittle. I stopped with activism for the moment due to this issues but it's still there making it hard for me to go to school.
General it's like this that I can wake up 6am, take a shower, eat, take on my clothes getting ready but I fear leaving the house for school and then I end up calling sick.
I am not dignosed with anxiety at all, so not sure 100% if it the thing, but in General I sit up long at night worry about going to school, when I wake up and are ready I feel sick and general I worry what everyone think or expect of me. I also had experience this with other schools also so it not that new.

Now after taking alot of days off because I just stay home, I promist to show up monday but still nervous If I will manage it.
The typical advice I got from people is more or less "Just doing it" or "Just get over it" which dosen't help me so much.

so could need some advice from someone who seams to know what i'm talking about
any advice is wellcomed.

-w Love

[Edge]

I don't have any advice. Heck, if I did, I'd be using it. I also don't know where to find it. Everywhere I look, it seems the only advice around is for shyness when it comes to meeting people, being in general social situations, and for when the fear is irrational. I can't find anything anywhere on what to do if the fear is rational and if the problem involves dealing with hate. The advice I do tend to get is along the lines of "stop caring" because, you know, that's useful (<-sarcasm).
In other words, if anyone has any idea of where to find useful information, inquiring minds want to know.

[Shantel]

There is a reason for these feelings and it's important to isolate and identify what it is that is causing this to happen to you.
Not having been born female I may not internalize hateful speech and behavior the same as some here but I have experienced it and unlike my old former persona I am no longer strong and loaded with T, and even though I'd like to I am unable to kick anyone's ass like in my former days. I've had to adopt a different tact in dealing with this stuff because it can evoke feelings of intense fear, so I make every effort to stifle fearful feelings within myself. Then the most important thing I do is mentally isolate the actual sources of this hateful stuff in terms of the specific individuals that are responsible for it. Then I make an effort to avoid contact with them thereby avoiding conflict. I have also weighed the situation carefully at times and have looked the perpetrator in the face and confronted them publicly, it is dangerous, you take some chances of being attacked physically, but it usually won't happen if the others close by are friendly toward you.

Probably the most important thing to keep in mind is that the perpetrator is trying to marginalize you from the rest of the group and make you appear to look like a fearful wuss in front of everyone. It's just another form of intimidation that people who are basically cowards themselves use to make themselves look like big shots and their victim look like a pansy ass. Somewhere in the recesses of your mind you have to steel yourself and say that you refuse to let it happen, that you are not going to just lie down and take abuse.

[Natkat]

I tried not carring but it's not always a good idea since people get kinda angry at you if you don't care.
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Without being sure I think the roth in my anxiety has something to deal with this pressure or expectations I got to be good enough and the fear that I would fail.

[Adam (birkin)]

That's a really, really common issue with activists. I was involved in a lot of activism until about 2 years ago when I also burned out. And I talked to a lot of other people who periodically just had a hard time dealing with the world for the same reason. It really takes a toll on you mentally because you see a lot of the bad in the world, and when people retaliate against your activism with hate messages or whatever, it really makes the world seem like a much worse place than it is.

I don't have any advice, honestly, I just wanted to let you know that this is a totally normal feeling to have.

[Shantel]

I tried not carring but it's not always a good idea since people get kinda angry at you if you don't care.
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Without being sure I think the roth in my anxiety has something to deal with this pressure or expectations I got to be good enough and the fear that I would fail.

What if you fail, who would be judging you on it?

[Natkat]

That's a really, really common issue with activists. I was involved in a lot of activism until about 2 years ago when I also burned out. And I talked to a lot of other people who periodically just had a hard time dealing with the world for the same reason. It really takes a toll on you mentally because you see a lot of the bad in the world, and when people retaliate against your activism with hate messages or whatever, it really makes the world seem like a much worse place than it is.

I don't have any advice, honestly, I just wanted to let you know that this is a totally normal feeling to have.

Yes unfurtunately, I know alot of people who have run themself down by activism, trying to hard looking for others while they should be focusing on themself. thats also why I try to stop now, at least for a moment I'll take a break.

What if you fail, who would be judging you on it?

Well, the school, and goverment thing would be jugding me to a certain degree, but I think my biggest jugement is from myself and my parrents.
"

[Shantel]

Yes unfurtunately, I know alot of people who have run themself down by activism, trying to hard looking for others while they should be focusing on themself. thats also why I try to stop now, at least for a moment I'll take a break.

Sometimes we break our hearts trying to help others when we need some time and peace for ourselves.

Well, the school, and goverment thing would be jugding me to a certain degree, but I think my biggest jugement is from myself and my parrents.

You can always cut yourself some slack and realize that you're only human and a certain amount of failure isn't going to be the end of your world. Maybe some of these perceived pressures have you too tightly wound?