First GP appointment.

[AdamMLP]

I'm hoping this is still the right place for a question like this, but as it's not directly about either T or top surgery, I'm assuming that this is the best place for it.

Just to explain my situation a bit, I'm in the UK, I've never met this doctor before and although I've mentioned it to my previous GP I don't know if my notes will have been transferred over yet because the NHS is painfully slow at everything, or even if it's in those notes.

I came out to one of my new friends last weekend that I'm male, I was fairly sure that she was going to be accepting because she'd been pointing out to the class that it's not okay to keep talking about one of the staff here just because she's a trans woman, or talk about her using male pronouns/her birthname.  It turns out that she'd suspected that I was trans anyway, apparently it was because of my mannerisms, but I think having to bare my hairy legs in front of her probably helped to out me as well... Anyway, she rang the doctors for me yesterday because she knows I'm useless at things like that, and my appointment's booked for Friday 25th October.

Should I just go in there and ask for a GIC referral straight out, or should I just tell them that I'm trans?  And is it worth going with a copy of the current protocol just in case they aren't clued up, or just wait until the next appointment to push paperwork and the pressure on to them?  And what sort of things are they likely to ask, if you have any idea?

One last question, is not having a name chance likely to cause problems for me in terms of moving forward?  I'm hesitant to change it at the moment because of the security pass I'm always wearing, and the fact that I live and work with the same people all of the time and there's no where to get away from them.

[Leo.]

I was in the same situation as you here really so maybe I can help a little. I had to move last year due to uni and had to register with the doctors there. My previous GP I ended up having to tell her about all this but because I was moving she said I had to deal with it with a new doctor. I didnt even know who to see in terms of what they dealt with, I expected none of them to know anything about this sort of issue. My initial appointment with the nurse to get registered I ended up having to tell her cause of the way I am around people. She suggested one of them simply because he actually listens to you and insisted I make an appointment so I went to see him. My previous GPs were all pretty useless, none of them ever put anything on my notes or record so they didnt know anything about anything previously. So you really dont need to worry about that they can easily still deal with stuff. When I went to him I just put about having gender issues. I wouldnt go straight in about referrals and stuff especially if its your first time seeing the doctor. Im pretty sure they wouldnt refer you on a first appointment, they'd want to see you again before making such a decision. He had never seen me before and wanted to see me again before taking things further

I didnt expect him to really know anything about it but he has 2 other trans patients, both MTFs. One has completely transitioned and one is still going through the process. You might not expect them to know anything but its likely they will have dealt with it before. I am his first FTM patient though and hes learning things from me about how the process works, seems his other patients didnt bother to relay any info back to him about it so he had nothing really to tell me. Only what he thought but couldnt be sure. Unlike them I am helping him so he can help others who follow. After I saw him again we talked about referrals (in terms of where to go as the one my previous GP said I'd need to go to he had never heard of so I had to decide between them) Once I decided on which he got the referral off that day and 2 weeks later I had my first appointment at the clinic. If you have an up to date copy of the protocol I'd certainly take it with you to show you know whats involved and it'd probably help them too incase they havent seen it before. They will want to get to know you first though in terms of background, why you feel you are, how long for, just how you feel. If they're convinced that you are then they can get a referral. I wouldnt go in there pushing it straight away, just see how it pans out. I didnt have to push anything cause my issues spoke for itself and it was obvious to him and to the specialist who runs the gender clinic. You shouldnt need to do any convincing or pushing cause you are so it'll happen. Unless they really dont know much about this then you may need to more but that will be apparent when you're there and you can then do so if you need to. Or if they're not being much help you could see another GP instead. I cant remember exactly what stuff he asked me but as I said it was mainly background, school life, family, stuff like that. Same things with the psychiatrist too. Just so they get to know you and what you say will make it obvious to them that you're trans

Name change wont be an issue at all. It will help in terms of starting RLE as it basically shows commitment to full time. I didnt get my legal name change until a few months after I first went to my new GP and it was after my initial clinic appointment. They will ask you if you have a preferred name and will call you by that if you're comfortable with it. Having a 'known as' name is fine and they have no problems with that. You dont need to change it immediately legally but whenever you're able to it will help, especially when you officially begin full time you will need to do it at some point. Doing it quickly can help speed up the process a bit though which is why I wanted to do mine as soon as possible, they typically take the date of the change as the official start date of RLE. Dont know in my case yet though as Im STILL waiting on my second appointment. Initially told 2-3 months, then got a letter saying 3-4 month delay. Its been over 3 months now and not even got the letter yet

I did nothing at all to 'prepare' for either appointment. Its just basic questions about yourself you shouldnt really need to practice or think much about. Without knowing the GP you cant tell if they will be up to speed on these issues or not but helping them is a good thing too so if you can take things like the protocol with you to help it cant be a bad thing. Most likely have basic knowledge but not much in terms of detail. Depends on their previous experience and you cant really know that until you speak to them. If its not working out try another one til you find one that understands enough to be able to get you to where you need to be

[Joe.]

I'm so glad you've decided to go to your GP, and I'm glad your new friend is understanding. That's brilliant news to hear. Well done on telling her.

Hopefully your old notes will be on there, usually once you register they all get passed over, but sometimes they're not so it's difficult to say. I would go in and explain that you're trans and that you'd like to be referred to a GIC. Hopefully that will be enough for them to make a referal. I'd take the protocol with you just in case, but take it in a back pack or something. If they don't have a clue what they're doing then bring it out, but don't go in with it in your hand. It's your first time meeting them and I wouldn't want them to think you're undermining them as soon as you enter the room. Take it with you but keep it out of sight. They're likely to ask you a few questions, how long you have been feeling like this etc etc.

At this current moment in time, I don't think not changing your name is likely to slow things down. It sucks, but as you know the waiting lists are currently quite long, so you could be waiting a while for your first appointment at the GIC. If it isn't appropriate for you to change your name right now, don't do it. Depending on what GIC you get referred to, if you haven't changed your name before you go there, they might be able to help you with the process. The only thing I can see it affecting is your RLE, as most places take this as starting from the day you change your name and go full time. But RLE is only usually required for a minimum of 1 to 2 years in order for you to have surgery so unless you plan to have surgery in the next 2 years, there's no rush at this time. If I were you, I would wait a while before changing your name because of the situation you're in. Like I said, you could be waiting months for your appointment at the GIC and there's nothing stopping you from changing your name shortly before your first appointment. The GIC will be able to talk this through with you, and it doesn't matter at all if you haven't changed it by the time your first appointment at the GIC comes.

I hope your appointment with the GP goes well. Let me know if you have any other questions about the whole process. Good luck!

[AdamMLP]

Thanks for the replies, I think I was probably being a little too pessimistic about how useful they are and I'll leave the protocol for the next time if it's necessary, I'm not in a major hurry to be printing that off in a crowded computer room anyway.  If they don't know what's going on then I'll bring something along the next time and help them out, I don't really want to be chopping and changing doctors right now because without taking time off work there's going to be a lot of time between appointments even without specifying a doctor.  I'd rather not have to take time off work because they'll want to know why, especially as I've not been signed off sick by the "nurse" here.

Yeah, I know about the waiting lists, I'm thinking of going to the Laurels, I'm assuming you've not heard anything from them yet?  The waiting list is going to be a nightmare, but Charing Cross (the closest) is going to be worse, and I've never really heard anything about the Norwich one, although that would also be in a fairly convenient place for me.  I think I'll probably wait on the name change until July, unless I think it's safe enough to come out whilst I'm trapped here.