Sibila,
I feel for your frustrations. I really do.
I feel grievances some times, too, when trans women play into ridiculous stereotypes. It bothers me when a lot of our ilk try to validate themselves or reinforce their insecurities by fulfilling tropes and feminine expectations. It really annoys me when trans women feel entitled and use boisterous attitudes or become grossly offended to try and combat discomfort or perceived ignorance. None of these actions do us, or ciswomen, any favors.
The way you're expressing yourself isn't doing anyone any favors, either. You're playing into stereotypes and invalidating both trans and cis people with them. We are people, not ideas or stories. Here's the reality of it:
Trans women can be mean.
Trans women can be insensitive.
Trans women can be stupid.
Trans women can be liars.
Trans women can be naive.
Trans women can be confused.
Trans women can be eccentric.
Trans woman can be brilliant.
Trans women can be kind.
Trans women can be honest.
Trans women can be nurturing.
Trans women can be wise.
Trans women can be awful, wonderful, reclusive, involved, uncaring, engaged, melancholic, jubilant -- the list goes on. The neat thing about this list is that it wholly applies to trans men, cis women, and cis men too.
People are all innately different and, to complicate things even more, raised and exposed differently. The even more particular thing about transgendered people is that we're raised against what someone who feels like us is typically raised as. We're taught to fulfill different roles -- and just like our cis cousins, some of us fit into those roles better than others. But that's all they are -- roles. There's no rule that says women must fulfill their common roles and men must fulfill their common roles, or they're simply not what they are.
The accusations and outlines you're making are really unfair, not just to the people you accuse, but yourself. I think it's okay to be frustrated with people who are naive and callous, but I also think it's important to recognize what you're frustrated with them about. I think you're going way too far to essentially say "I do not want to be a woman, and anyone who does is invalid."
I know a lot of cis women who love being a woman. They're in that position because they think of themselves as human first and foremost and love to do their best to be who they are. They still recognize the hardships women (both cis and trans) go through, but they wouldn't have it any other way. There are many trans women who feel this way about being a woman, too, and they are just as valid.
