I've been all over the place emotionally lately, especially these last couple of weeks. I've cried more times than I'm used to. I've screamed until my throat feels raw and scratchy. I've been filled with both hope and doubt; courage and fear. One minute I feel like the world is just waiting for me to arrive, the next I feel like it'll never happen and I should just curl up and die. It's been a very stressful ride ever since my relapse. Ever since I crawled out of my drunken stupor once again to face reality. I'm not a man. I never was. And it has to change. This time I knew I had to make it happen. No more running away. No more escaping. No more denial.
On 1/14/14 I will be the proud owner of a body fueled by estrogen!
The testosterone that has poisoned my mind and body for decades will finally be a thing of the past. Good riddance! Welcome sweet E!
I can't wait! I'm so excited! A month ago I was sure it would never happen for me! But if you hang in there, it'll happen! Just try to keep your eye on the prize, and make good decisions along the way to set yourself up for success. And when you stumble, get back up and keep moving. That's really all we can do. Stubborn determination in the face of adversity. Ignore fear. It only has power over if you if you let it! Focus, and take it one day at a time. You will succeed if you refuse to give up! Take the life you need to survive!
Take it! It's already yours!
Good luck to everyone else beginning their journey! I love you all!
So happy! HRT! Yay!
