trying to go full time need advice

[evecrook]

It"s  a bit difficult . I'm taking it slow. I wear a full c cup. I always wear my bra, I
sit in a couple of different coffee places all the time. My breast's are quite noticeable. I don't wear make up so right now I'm obviously male. I have awhile to go for my face to change. I am wearing nail polish all the time but I guess a lot of people do that. It can be a little difficult to deal with. when my face changes it will be all right. I've gone out in public before wearing dresses. I love wearing dresses.I so much want to go full time. I am concerned though because I've lived in the same area for so long a lot of people see me every day. I was just wondering if there are any suggestion's about going full force in a place where a lot of people know you as male. I'm not working at the moment so that's a future concern.

[Robin Mack]

It's a big step, Eve... and I can imagine waiting for facial changes must be very difficult.  Have you tried going to a make-up store (like Ulta, or Macy's makeup department) for a makeover?  I know that decent makeup can go a long way from taking even the most masculine face into a very feminine direction, and the right products can make a huge difference, too.

Another suggestion, if you haven't done this already, is to cultivate CIS-female friends... they're natives in the realm of womanhood, they never had to mask their nature with masculine traits.  Book clubs, gardening circles, you-name-it can have you start picking up mannerisms and habits like nothing else (I'm still pre-HRT but get quite girly in the company of women... I feel so much more right).

Those are the only suggestions that I can think of, beyond the obvious things like finding out what other women of your social status and age wear and buying similar outfits.

Good luck to you!  *hug*

[evecrook]

thanks appreciate it

[evecrook]

make up would probably help alot

[Katie]

Put simply. Nothing short of a 100% effort is worthless.

You talking about doing the most difficult thing you can imagine and for your own benefit and the benefit of others you have to do it 100%.

Why do I say others benefit. Well if you send mixed messages (by doing less than 100%) they will assume your nuts. On the other hand if you give it your all and never look back they will come to realize you mean business.

If you want to do the baby step way then by all means you can hang out in the trans community and never evolve beyond that but hey your a woman I am guessing so why not be one?

[evecrook]

thanks your absolutely right. I just need to jump in

[LordKAT]

Take Cindy's attitude and you can't go wrong.

[Cindy]

Who me?

Woman develop, as do men, throughout their lives learning, subconsciously, how to act, present and be a 'normal' member of their society. We have to do the crash course.

So study.

Sit watch and observe how woman in your society act and present. How do they interact with each other and with men children environment etc. What do they do when they talk, greet each other, deal with children. How do they react in shops, to authorities, to life?

You would have learned male behaviour, that is different to female behaviour. We have different privileges, different concerns, different desires. Your sexuality is unimportant your standing in the community is what makes you fit in.

You need to consciously act to fit in as you. There is ultimately only one way of doing that. You take the plunge and when you are safe and comfy you go for it. But there is no turning back, no hesitation and no regrets. Once you are true to yourself there is only one way of being true.

Hugs

Cindy

[evecrook]

thanks your right

[evecrook]

thank you so much

[Paulagirl]

I went full time before HRT. I spent years thinking I could do it all myself, and didn't need drugs, therapy, or surgery. I just looked at myself one day, and said to myself 'I don't need to change back' so I didn't.
I had the advantage that I had just moved to a small town, so very few people knew the old me. It's still a VERY small town, and they all know I'm TS, and for the most part don't care. I get gendered correctly, and I'm just treated as the lady I wish to be.
Now, on HRT, been thru therapy, doing it all the 'right' way, I realize, there is no 'right' way. If you feel good about it, have the confidence, think you look good enough (perfection is an unattainable ideal), you can go full time, anytime.
Remember, the difference between passing, and being accepted can be huge.
Waiting for HRT to feminize you could take awhile. Plus, your degree of feminization could be huge or miniscule. Time to get pro active, and get busy taking things into your own hands, a see what HRT brings down the road. Well down the road.
Going full time before HRT is certainly not for everyone. I have the confidence of a daylight burglar, thick skin, and a don't give a crap attitude.

[evecrook]

thanks so much

[Jerri]

gosh I am so right there sistah,
i go out in the small town i have lived in for 25 years, but made a commitment to my wife to not go full time until after holidays. i am 56 and have not yet been on hrt long enough to pass but i do not care about what others think so much any more. i get a maam now and then so it keeps me living, most of the folks i work with have pegged me as gay but my hr department has agreed to an all out after January then they will know and get on with it.
near as i can tell it is best to just do what feels right to you and get comfortable with who you are. the rest of the folks will adjust or not. I have found that as long it is right for me then i am ok with moving forward, if it makes me uncomfortable then I must figure out what and why. each of us is going to have to find the pace that works for us and go that way. I have burnt and built bridges so far and have not found myself boxed in but have had to adjust course a few times to make things work for me and those who i effect.
wish all the iner strength you need need and move forward with faith and commitment
xo Jerri leeann