What are some consequences of switching gender therapists?

[Jean24]

Well I'm thinking about it. I feel my therapist is concentrating too much on my life that is not gender related. Most areas of my life are kidna in the ditch right now and I always hear about how I'm depressed. On thing that does bother me is that every time I see her, it costs me a lot of money and I don't have a good paying job. I'm thinking about switching to someone who charges less since I have had a better experience in the past with someone who doesn't charge hardly anything. However, I want to know what kind of consequences that I will face if I leave her office. Will I still be able to start HRT in 2 months as planned or how does that work? What are some long term consequences if any? Thank you!

[LilLivvy91]

Ive never been in therapy, so i cant speak from experience. But logic tells me that the only real disadvantage would be having to reintroduce your life to a new person. Hopefully a better one.

[Cindy]

I suppose the worse would be a new therapist being suspicious of why you changed and seeking info from the last one, which could be negative report from a 'slighted' therapist. Not very professional but.............

The other would be having to start from scratch with the new one and waiting again.

Is there any way of pursuing an informed consent model?

On the plus side you really have to trust your therapist and if you don't, well you can't have an open discussion with them about your stuff and that is important for many of us.

[Heather]

The only consequence I can think of is you'll have to start over your wait for hrt. But it sounds like she is doing her job dealing with your other life problems are just as important as your gender issues. You would be surprised how the little problems you ignore turn out to be bigger once your put under the stress of transitioning.

[suzifrommd]

I switched GTs. Best decision of my transition. The earlier guy was a cold fish, my new therapist really understands me.

The only consequence I can think of is you'll have to start over your wait for hrt.

Not for a doctor that follows the current guidelines. WPATH SOC 7.0 state that very clearly. From first paragraph on page 41:

While psychotherapy or ongoing counseling is not required for the initiation of hormone therapy, if a therapist is involved, then regular communication among health professionals is advised (with the patient's consent) to ensure that the transition process is going well, both physically and psychosocially.

(http://www.wpath.org/uploaded_files/140/files/Standards%20of%20Care,%20V7%20Full%20Book.pdf)

[FalseHybridPrincess]

I still dont get therapists though...

why on earth would she say "oh ok in two moths you ll start hormones"

I mean..what difference do these two months even make?

pffff if therapists could really understand us we would get hormones from the first day ...

Anyway its kinda risky , now you at least know that in 2 months you ll begin,,,what if the other one needs more time?
you never know...

[Heather]

I switched GTs. Best decision of my transition. The earlier guy was a cold fish, my new therapist really understands me.

Not for a doctor that follows the current guidelines. WPATH SOC 7.0 state that very clearly. From first paragraph on page 41:

(http://www.wpath.org/uploaded_files/140/files/Standards%20of%20Care,%20V7%20Full%20Book.pdf)

Lol people actually read that? Just kidding but I'll be honest I've never read any of the SOC sorry I need a story.

[suzifrommd]

Well if your therapist insists on gatekeeping, you can always say the magic words:

"I'll continue self-medicating if I have to, but I'd really like a doctor's supervision."

Most therapists will gladly refer you right away.

Note that I'm not advocating self medicating (a very bad idea), simply implying that you've been doing it. Not a good idea to lie to a therapist, but if they're going to be a gatekeeper, they better get used to being lied to.

[Jean24]

A little update: I am out of work again because my job was seasonal. Back to the job hunt I guess.

I honestly don't have a problem with my therapist helping me with other life problems but it seems like she makes some obstacles for me to overcome. For example she pretty much looked at how every area of my life has some problem (no employment, a few friends but no social life, no serious relationships, the problems that come with being trans, the school that just accepted me is not being very helpful when it comes to advisement, etc.) and asked me how I plan on doing it all because it doesn't seem like I have a plan. I told her that I'm going to wing it and do what I can when I can afford to. That didn't seem good enough though... I think I'm going to ask about affordable counseling at the LGBT center. Thanks for the info everyone.

[JoanneB]

When I started therapy a few years ago it was solely for life issues, with a little GD on the side. In fact transitioning was the last thing I ever saw coming out of the process. I came to that fork in the road over 30 years ago. Well, that was exactly why I was there. Most of my life disasters were rooted in me being trans and how I tried to mold myself into some image of what a guy should be like.

These days I am seeing a GT. (Now that it does not mean a 3 hour drive, just 20 minutes) I switched due to a relocation. The mission statement is still sort of the same. Can I survive staying as a guy? Do I need to transition?  If I felt 30 years when I experimented with transition like I do today, the decision to forge ahead would be a no brainer, in a heartbeat. Unfortunately back then I had way too many other issues getting in the way

Starting over means starting over. Some in the USA may be in CYA mode. Some are more "Informed consent" types. Some are; If you are that sure and aren't obviously (clinically) unbalanced then who am I to stop you?; types. It may still take several "Getting acquainted" sessions before either of you have a feel as to where this is going. A local TG group may have some insights on who to best serve your needs.

[Ltl89]

Hey Jean,

I just wanted to say that it's very normal for a therapist to look at everything in our life, not just the gender issue.  The goal of therapy is to make progress in our lives.  Part of that would be to consider improving all areas of our life.  For example, when I was unemployed, my therapist really harped on that.  The reason was that she saw how much it effected my self esteem and left me with no confidence.  In order to take on such a daunting task as transitioning, confidence and self esteem really help.  Same thing with family drama and my relationship with them.  My therapist saw that was my big problem that has been causing much of my negative self perception.  All in all, my gender dysphoria is only a part of my transition and the therapy I'm receiving.  And I'm glad because taking on these other problems really has enabled me to move forward and progress further with my transition.  Having said that, I don't know your therapist and what the sessions are like.  I would just say that focusing on other topics isn't necessarily a bad thing.

By the way, not every therapist has a time frame for hrt.  Mine, for example, decides along with the patient when the time is right, if it is at all. For some, that's a month and for others it's never.   I'd go to someone that has experience with our community if you are worried about harsh gatekeeping.

Good luck!

[barbie]

But it sounds like she is doing her job dealing with your other life problems are just as important as your gender issues. You would be surprised how the little problems you ignore turn out to be bigger once your put under the stress of transitioning.

Yes. I guess she is an excellent therapist.

Several years ago, I consulted with a psychiatrist after filling a long list of questionnaires. His office was in the same hospital where a famous surgeon had operated several hundred cases of SRS.

After consultation, he approved my request of HRT, and finally added that the most important criterion of his decisions is whether the patient can maintain a normal life after getting HRT or SRS. I had a very stable permanent job, and my wife and my colleagues there were supportive of me. These were the most critical factors in his decision.

But, my problem was that the surgeon refused to prescribe for HRT. He said he would do if I come again with my wife. At that point, I stopped.

barbie~~