losing friends

[Riley Skye]

I've bought this up a few times before about old friends and I'm just now finding out exactly what is going on with them. Last Friday I did a purge of sorts and defriended a good amount of people from Facebook and only now is everyone concerned and confused about why I did that. I talked to one person amongst them who is part of it and another who has simply sat back and observed everything. The second friend explained everything to me about why everyone was so upset at me. I was told that I said inflammatory things about politics over the course of the year and when talking about a lot of other stuff I would get very emotional. Not only that but I have been pushing myself away from people since the early summer and it got to the point where I stopped talking and then deleted hem off of Facebook the past few months. No one bothered to talk to me or understand my situation and just got all upset when I began deleting them from my life. Only my friend who I talked to Wednesday decided to educate himself and is understand that mentally I'm going through a lot with my transition, depression, anxiety and social issues. These friends of mine were never there for me this year, choosing to remain ignorant and at times emotionally hostile towards me with my transition and mental illnesses. It feels insulting that I had to delete them off of Facebook to get anything out of them, not being overly emotional or pushing away but Facebook of all places. I told the two I talked to come mid to late January I will come back and talk to them. I need time to relax for the rest of the holidays and to think. Personally I'm really leaning on making my peace and moving on from them. This is the second time this has happened and I no longer trust them to be open and honest with me about anything. Right now I need friends who are caring, supportive, understanding and can give me a shoulder to cry on. I need none of these ignorant subtly abusive criticisms that I heard all year.

[evecrook]

Are these people you only now on the internet or have you known them from personal friend ships outside the internet. If you've known them from off the internet You should just meet with and talk.

[Riley Skye]

I know them in real life. It's that it took kicking them off my Facebook to hear from them and I said I will talk to them in a month which they've agreed with.

[Isabelle]

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."

[missy1992]

hey Riley,
I don't know how your situation can end up, so take any advice that you may construe from my words with a grain of salt. When reading your post, I couldn't help but relate my own personal story with that of yours. When I had friction with my old group of friends, I found myself in shoes similar to your own. Deleting them out of your life may just be the only way to go. It will most certainly feel hurtful, but I guarantee you that you will end up better in the end. Think of your transition as a filter of sorts... any acquintace of yours that leaves your side in this moment would have undoubtedly done so in a variety of other situations. These people are below you in very man things.

Now, when they are off Facebook and your life you will begin to make new friends. Great friends. People whom you would love for your old friends to see you have made. And your life will get better... and eventually, you won't even bad an eyelash when you pass them in real life or see them pop up somehow in your social media feed... you could care less for their (inferior) mentality because you are so much better than them that they have literally no power at all over you. The lion cares not for the opinion of sheep.

With that said and done (maybe those paragraphs were more for me than you tbh) I truly hope that things work out with your friends. Just recently one whom I thought to not ever talk to again followed me on a social media profile and liked some of my posts. It was a small step but it brought me a smile. I'm sure no matter the outcome you will only come out stronger