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Trying to plan things out

Started by CaitGSith, January 16, 2014, 05:30:39 PM

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CaitGSith

Okay, essentially I've decided to make a promise to myself to fully come out as trans and start presenting as female etc. before the end of the year. Now, I'm in the process of trying to make up plans for how to handle it. I'm already out to the majority of my friends (Who are all accepting of it), but that's not really where the issue lies.
The issue is really more with family. Essentially, my father is very bigoted, and has negative views of pretty much anything outside of the "norm", so  I can't imagine it going to well, and is really the reason it's taken me until now to do anything about it.
So, really, I can expect him to react badly to it. Not sure how badly, but I'm almost certain he will. Now, getting kicked out probably won't be too much of an issue (Mental health team have given me numbers I can call in that situation to get me somewhere to stay), however, that is really a worst case scenario, and I'm trying to find ways to get it handled in the best possible way, and so am looking for a bit of advice (I care a bit to much about people to want him to handle it badly, disown me, etc.)
Right now, one possible thing I can think of that will be helpful would be to have a friend there with me, hopefully to keep him from going completely mad about it. Outside of all that though, I'm still pretty lost on the best way of going about it. So, really, I'm hoping someone may be able to give me some useful tips, or just general advice. Thanks for reading this mess of disjointed sentences, hope someone can make sense of it!
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LizMarie

Caith, your profile says you are 22.

What I would recommend before anything else at all, is simply move out. Be out and on your own, before you come out to your father. If you can get a job presenting female, do it! If not, do what you need to do so you can be independent and stable no matter what else happens. Then and only then come out to your dad.

I think having a friend present might be a good way to temper the situation.

I wish you luck, but focus on stabilizing yourself first. Once that is done, lots of other things will become easier.
The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.



~ Cara Elizabeth
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CaitGSith

Quote from: LizMarie on January 17, 2014, 04:14:48 PM
Caith, your profile says you are 22.

What I would recommend before anything else at all, is simply move out. Be out and on your own, before you come out to your father. If you can get a job presenting female, do it! If not, do what you need to do so you can be independent and stable no matter what else happens. Then and only then come out to your dad.

I think having a friend present might be a good way to temper the situation.

I wish you luck, but focus on stabilizing yourself first. Once that is done, lots of other things will become easier.

That's kind of where a bit of a problem arises. I have no real hope of getting my own place any time soon, short of if I get kicked out, thanks to being stuck pretty much unemployable at the moment. Honestly, given that the gender side of things are one of the main causes of a lot of my problems, I really don't think I can be waiting even more years to do anything about it and risk screwing up my life even more!
Regardless though, thank you!
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LizMarie

The chicken and the egg! That's a hard spot to be in. I wish you luck and hope you don't get thrown out.
The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.



~ Cara Elizabeth
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