Feeling Lost

[stephaniec]

I'm learning that not everyone is the same at all. I just want to be able to reach out to people and have friends for once who aren't being subtly transphobic or ablest. With the previous group I had they always made fun of me for perceived stupidity and despite them saying they cared it hurt because I always got the brunt of it. I also was never fully accepted as myself either but I guess it was because of gross ignorances. I honestly just don't want to be lonely like I've ended up so many times before.

I think you need to move forward. I don't have the friends I had long time ago. people come and go. There is a lot going on in life. Just look around how many people do you see every day. Every body is looking for friendship . Basically  we're all in the same boat. There's all sorts of clubs or athletic clubs. I find coffee houses incredibly easy places to meet people You can have great conversations in grocery stores. Actually I've met quite a few people sitting in starbucks.

[Riley Skye]

Well I have found good friends, it's just one specific thing that I feel out of place other than that I love being with those whom I met and gotten close with over the past number of months. When it comes to talking with strangers I simply can't do that at all either.

[stephaniec]

well, before you met your friends they must of been strangers to you

[Bobbi]

Hi Riley,
You are special - be courageous, be strong.  I have found a few amazing girlfriends - they are my Angels.  I learn to keep my heart open.  I've experienced pain, but also real beauty.  And I only get that when I take a chance.  I quickly felt uncomfortable with the people I was meeting previously & made a conscious decision that I need to change associations - to move forward - for me.  With kindness & grace.

Hope this helps!

Love & hugs - Bobbi

[JessieBirdie]

Umm..I more than likely am on the autism spectrum, my psychiatric is currently testing me to make a diagnosis. It is very hard for me to socialize and make friends. I do try to go out and join clubs or running teams but I end up leaving a lot of the time because of social problems. I find it hard to stay because I feel and get very awkward with people and at times annoy or upset them without even knowing what I did. I finally found some people who I've managed to get along with after I had to leave my old group of friends. It took me over a year at school and half a year in group to actually open up to them. Right now I don't want to be alone and I don't know where else I can go as of this moment. And these are people who have been really awesome to me.

Mhmmm autism spectrum, I was diagnosed myself with the High-Functioning kind when I was a child and saw tons of therapists/specialists (occupational therapists, speech therapists, psychologists, you name it) when I was in elementary school.  I don't let it define me though, but I know it makes me somewhat socially awkward and more often than not asocial/reserved.  No one ever guesses I was furthermore diagnosed, but anyway.

I feel odd in the trans community. Of all the trans girls I know I'm the only one who still dresses and acts boyish. I hate make-up, I don't like dresses, I wear boy clothes at the expense of passing for now, I love my hair short like it is now, I still do a lot of stereotypical guy things. All the other trans girls I know are rather feminine and it gets hard to relate at times. I feel out of place when talking with the girls because I can't relate and it is a lot worse with he guys. I feel lost within my own trans space.

Mhmm, well I'm in a similar boat to you.  For the past 4 years I've been on hormones but I never do makeup or wear skirts/dresses, specifically.  There are some differences though, my hair is long (that is the FIRST thing I changed actually), my entire wardrobe is from the women's isle ( tend to wear women's tops/pants or androgynous ones+bras because I NEED them for practical purposes) and I don't actually hate those things, but I'm not used to them, and I haven't played around that much with them mainly because I'm scared to death of being read and stereotyped as a transsexual out in public (dresses and noticeable cosmetics really bring that one home if you're read as a male imho), combined with the fact I really just don't get anything out of using cosmetics and wearing dresses/skirts.  I want to change that though and really feminize my appearance more so I can function better in professional settings.  From what I've seen, I just feel there's some discrimination against androgynous folks in the workplace (and formal work clothes tend to be rather gendered, anyway--yeah there's pantsuits and blah blah blah, but still).

I can't really get the motivation to do that though :v.

Oh and as for guy things, define that.  Imho there really aren't any real "guy" or "girl" activities out there.