Name trouble, need help

[Shana-chan]

Soo, the name you chose to be called. How did you come up with it and what made it stick? How many names did you go though before finding your name and did you ever get tired of that name and or go back to another one? And how long have you been going by that name? Also, did you have people calling you by that name then switched between names you chose and the people that heard the new name, what was their reaction? I am asking because, for me, I can't think of but one name to call myself and whenever I'm called that name, I don't know, it just feels weird and I don't know how else to word it but it does have another feeling to it besides weird, like, it's not my name yet is but I don't know. >_< Maybe it just takes time getting used too? Any advice/help etc. I thank you for in advance.

[stephaniec]

just used my name

[FalseHybridPrincess]

Hey shana chan 

You said that each time others call you by a current name you ve though makes you feel wierd...
that happened to me a lot too...

The thing is that you still havent figured out your name , cause when you ll find it , it wont feel wierd to be called like that...it will feel just natural.

It took me a long time,,,just keep thinking and search for names,meanings etc

[nonameyet]

i just looked at a few, thought over it, tried to find one that had no negative association or even really positive ones. Settled on Marla. just happens to be similar to my current name.

[Hikari]

Originally I had my fathers name but I never really used it, for a time I used my middle name, then a nickname. When I went to pick a female name the once I settled on is an anagram of my mothers name, I basically hate my parents but It felt right to have my name give a discreet nod back to them. I still don't understand it, but it feels right so I stick with it.

[allisonsteph]

I chose my name simply because I liked it. When I looked back at every short story I had ever written since I was eight years old, there was always a character named Allison. It just seemed like a natural choice. I'm still getting used to hearing it though. My doctor's office allows people to use a preferred name instead of their legal name. So my records say Allison AKA Male Name. I get a little kick every time they call me Allison rather than my given name.

[Sheala]

I actualy used a veriation of my name for a very long time throught my life. My wife was actualy the one to come up with Sheala. she said it and i thought it over for moment and it stuck, I loved it and it fits me so well.

Falseprincess is 100% right once you find your name it will feel right. it wont feel odd or a strugel.

[Batty/Nattie]

Natalie is my third name and I love it but, I'm not sure why I chose it. I still think it's still weird hearing it from certain people, though

[LivingTheDream]

Dang, I wrote a nice reply and I backed up before I posted... Let's see how this one comes out lol.

I kinda think any name you choose is gonna start off a bit weird because all you're life you've been called one name and have grown used to it. I think it will prolly take some getting used to being called a new name as well.

Are there any names you've heard growing up that you really like? Have you tried looking up baby names on the web or in a book, maybe you could find an awesome name that way. You could also ask your parents what your name might've been if you were born a female. I would avoid using a friend's, family member's or even just an acquaintance's name.

I ended up settling on Kelly, at least for now, because I like that name, it's close to my birth name, and it fits in with the theme my parents sort of had in naming us (my brother, my mom and I all had names starting with "K"). I'm not out or anything yet, so nobody calls me it, as I'm still very new to all of this, so idk if I'm gonna end up keeping it or not yet. It took me awhile to pick out that name, so I know deciding on a name is difficult. I hope this helps a bit, I wish you the best, hope you find a name that you love!

-Kelly

[JaneNicole2013]

LOL. Here is my story. I was watching a classic Dr. Who one night and one of the character's names was "Lady Jane" (not Sarah Jane). This was about 3.5 years ago and was the  same night PrideFest ended in St. Louis. Someone posted on Facebook about "being yourself." That night, in bed, I "came out to myself" and searched my mind for names. "Jane" popped up, I liked it, and it stuck. My g/f gave me my middle name.

I LOVE it when she or others call me by that name because it IS who I am.

Jane

[Tori]

Found one that sounded like my former name, thought about several, now I am Tori.

I picked this name in part because I do not know many Toris, and I hate none of them.

Clearly I am not from England or into their politics.

Funny, Victoria is really growing on me now. I picked the nickname and I am beginning to love the long form.

[katiej]

I tend to like traditional names, and I really wanted to name my daughter Katherine.  But my wife wasn't going to have it.  She wanted a more modern name.

After coming out to myself, it just came to me...I want to be called Kate.  And suddenly it all became very real to me.  Naming someone (or even yourself) is a powerful experience.  I've been transgender my whole life, but it was like Katherine Elizabeth was born in that moment.

[Carol2000]

When I was aged about three, my girl cousins who were between nine and 12 years older than me used to play with me whenever we went over to visit. They loved teasing me and if I sulked about anything they would start calling me Alice instead of my birth name.

Even at that age, I realised I really liked it when they did that and used every opportunity to make them call me Alice. When I got older they stopped doing it, like when I was approaching my teens they would put my then long blonde hair in curlers and paint my nails and say someting like: "Look, Alice is back" .

I used to dream about really being Alice. So you would have thought my name now would be Alice. But then along came a rock star called Alice Cooper and it kinda put me off the name.

I became Caroline because it had long been a name I had liked. It lasted me for a few years before transition and fitted well, so I stuck with it.
Sometimes you just have to try and see what you're comfortable with.

A friend of mine had adopted the name of Davinia because it was the female version of her birth name, but I felt it didn't really suit her.
One day we were talking about names and she said she was going to legally change hers to Davinia. I said I didn't think it really suited her.

We tried a few variations and I said that for some reason I had always felt Liz would be a good name for her. She mulled it over for a while and agreed and became Liz.


Why not try a few names with your friends around and see what they think.

Caroline

[Oriah]

I was trying and trying to figure out a name, but I couldn't decide on one for a few months.......then one night in a dream an old friend (the first person I ever told I was trans) showed  in a dream and was calling me by the name I use now......she got hit by a bus in Houston over a year ago when that happened.....

she just called me by that name, as if it had always been my name.....so I started going by it.....

its the only name that ever seemed right

[emilyking]

I had originally, came up with Katie-Ann Elizabeth.
However, since my sister's name is Kathy it didn't seam right.
(I'm not afraid to use my real name or my new name.  My name is on file in the FCC database.)
My first name (for now at least) is Rudy.  I wanted a name that was short, and ended with Y.  I tried quite a few until I choose the one I like.  Besides, I've always liked the name since it was in one of my favorite books as a child (Clifford the Big Red Dog).
Ru, was a nickname given to me when I was working at a grocery store.  One of the girls I worked with gave it to me, and I liked it.  In a way it's a nod to who I will leave behind, but yet feminine.

So, Emily Ru King.

It took quite a while before I came up with any name really.  Since I really tried so hard to repress my feelings, I never gave it any thought.

On a side note, my Mom told me before I came out that she would have named me Lela, from Doctor who.  While that would have been cool, I didn't feel the name fit me.

Best of luck!

[Alexis Paige]

I always enjoyed the fact that my name was a gender neutral one so I've never felt any real need to change it. Still, since I was little I would think about if I was female and my name was always Alexis. So that's why I've decided that I will change it, even if that is only for occasions where my full name is used.
As for my last name. I don't have that strong a connection to my original last name, so I chose one that sounded. I figure I will change my middle name as well so that my name has a better flow to it when you say it.

[Shana-chan]

So, after reading all the posts here, I can't help but wonder if it's "normal/natural" to have to get used to being called a name we picked out for ourselves? Maybe it just takes time of being called that name before it feels normal/natural?

[Danniella]

My advice whenever looking at picking a name is to simply go to google and search for common names in around about the year and place that you were born. (most places have census data etc)

Have a look through the list until you find one that you like and go with it.

This way you should find a name that suits your age and birth place, like most cis gendered peeps, and avoid any alarm bells ringing due to a strange name not quite fitting with what you expected. I mean everybody has met one person who you thought "wow that's a really old name" or whatever, this way you avoid that.

I also think it's important to not over think your name. Most cis people don't choose their name, their parents do, it's just a title that people can identify you with, it does not need to compliment or symbolise you or your life in any way, it's just a name. When people put too much though into it is when we end up with some really strange or out of place names imo.

Speaking of parents, that's another idea, most parents have multiple names for their unborn kids, male and female, try asking them what they would have called you had you been born female. That could be a really touching gesture for them that you considered them in the naming process.

But that's just my 2c ^^

[ath]

The name is something that I'm stuck on as well.

I would have been named Robin if I were born a girl, but I don't know if I like that name.

I feel like a V-name would be ideal for me. I've been debating between Victoria and Veronica and Violet. Leaning towards Violet, it seems to resonate better with me. Only coincidence my name would be Violet Black, two colors, hahaha. I don't know what I think about that, but I still like the name Violet a lot, and thinking of being called that name feels better to me.

Is it weird though, to have a name that is comprised of two colors? It's totally unintentional, I just like the name Violet.

[Danniella]

The name is something that I'm stuck on as well.

I would have been named Robin if I were born a girl, but I don't know if I like that name.

I feel like a V-name would be ideal for me. I've been debating between Victoria and Veronica and Violet. Leaning towards Violet, it seems to resonate better with me. Only coincidence my name would be Violet Black, two colors, hahaha. I don't know what I think about that, but I still like the name Violet a lot, and thinking of being called that name feels better than me.

Is it weird though, to have a name that is comprised of two colors? It's totally unintentional, I just like the name Violet.

I would not recommend it :S It sounds very much like a stage name and will definitely draw additional attention.

Violet is also a very old name, not sure how old you are but unless you were born in 1924, the chances of you being called that naturally are very slim ^^

http://www.babycenter.com/baby-names-violet-4628.htm