job searching while in transition

[Clarity]

I'm needing some help on here as I am running out of hope. I lost my job of 5 years last March at the time I was coming out to them and have been un/underemployed since. I'm now to the point where it takes a lot of energy just to get myself to try job searching and am starting to fear that I won't be able to make my 2 job contacts requirements for unemployment insurance or that my benefit will run dry before I can find anything.

The main suggestion I have heard is to relocate, but I do not have the funds to do that right now unless I want to accept living in my car for 2 months until I can afford deposit on rent and to turn on utilities. I'm also afraid to leave where I am since I am in one of the few states where being transgender is protected. I also have found a loving community here that I don't really want to leave.

I've also considered going back to school, but my fears there are ending up in this same boat but with even more student debt that I'll probably never pay off.

I need some serious help here. My dysphoria has been driving me crazy and I need to find a way to be able to afford facial hair removal and surgery in a timely manner. I'm getting by for now and am getting my bills paid on time and am able to afford HRT, counseling, and Dr. appointments every few months but I fear being stuck in the same point of my transition. The only thing I'm not able to pay at this time is my student loan bills (which have been on deferral for nearly a year now). Obviously, getting a good paying job would help my transition, but I have no faith at this point that will ever happen. I also feel bad trying to get to surgery when I have student loans that I can't pay for that will probably deny my extension of deferment at some point.

[Androgynous_Machine]

I'm needing some help on here as I am running out of hope. I lost my job of 5 years last March at the time I was coming out to them and have been un/underemployed since. I'm now to the point where it takes a lot of energy just to get myself to try job searching and am starting to fear that I won't be able to make my 2 job contacts requirements for unemployment insurance or that my benefit will run dry before I can find anything.

The main suggestion I have heard is to relocate, but I do not have the funds to do that right now unless I want to accept living in my car for 2 months until I can afford deposit on rent and to turn on utilities. I'm also afraid to leave where I am since I am in one of the few states where being transgender is protected. I also have found a loving community here that I don't really want to leave.

I've also considered going back to school, but my fears there are ending up in this same boat but with even more student debt that I'll probably never pay off.

I need some serious help here. My dysphoria has been driving me crazy and I need to find a way to be able to afford facial hair removal and surgery in a timely manner. I'm getting by for now and am getting my bills paid on time and am able to afford HRT, counseling, and Dr. appointments every few months but I fear being stuck in the same point of my transition. The only thing I'm not able to pay at this time is my student loan bills (which have been on deferral for nearly a year now). Obviously, getting a good paying job would help my transition, but I have no faith at this point that will ever happen. I also feel bad trying to get to surgery when I have student loans that I can't pay for that will probably deny my extension of deferment at some point.

You are going to have to relocate hun.

There are trans-friendly cities/states that have excellent programs available to you.   In Minnesota for example, it is illegal to not hire based on gender identity, a law that was put into place back in 1993 I think.   What's nice about MN versus say, California, is the cost of living is significantly lower.  Transitioning is expensive enough without the added cost of living expenses.

If you are in a community (in your case the state) that hasn't set up protections and venues of grievance then you need to look into relocating.  In MN, they have programs to help you find housing, find work, and get things set up for you.  All of which is available to transgendered people and cannot, by law, be made unavailable to you due to gender identity.

The means is there, you just have to look into different things hun.  Sometimes it really is just better to pick up your toys and leave.

-AM

[stephaniec]

In my personal opinion  I wouldn't worry about hair removal or surgery until the funds are there. More important to keep a roof over your head. Depending on the career out look for what you go to school for it probably be worth it . It would give you time and a career.

[Clarity]

I think the only thing my home state (Iowa) has going for it is that gender identity is protected from discrimination. I have filed a complaint against my old job, but I haven't heard anything back since November when I filled out an additional survey about why I think I was discriminated against. I don't think I can win this case since I feel like my old job is going to come up with as much evidence as they can find showing that I was a bad employee (which makes me afraid to even give potential jobs permission to contact them). I came across a program for job placement assistance in the San Francisco/ LA area, but that would be a large move for me. I think relocating one state north might be an option if I can get cost assistance for the relocation.

[Androgynous_Machine]

I think the only thing my home state (Iowa) has going for it is that gender identity is protected from discrimination. I have filed a complaint against my old job, but I haven't heard anything back since November when I filled out an additional survey about why I think I was discriminated against. I don't think I can win this case since I feel like my old job is going to come up with as much evidence as they can find showing that I was a bad employee (which makes me afraid to even give potential jobs permission to contact them). I came across a program for job placement assistance in the San Francisco/ LA area, but that would be a large move for me. I think relocating one state north might be an option if I can get cost assistance for the relocation.

Personal question: Have you finished your BA?

Because I know for a fact University of MN has relocation assistance for students.

If not, two birds, one stone.  Finish your degree and move to a more trans-friendly state.   If nothing else, just take enough classes to qualify for the assistance, finish the courses, and go about with your life.

-AM

[Clarity]

Personal question: Have you finished your BA?

Because I know for a fact University of MN has relocation assistance for students.

If not, two birds, one stone.  Finish your degree and move to a more trans-friendly state.   If nothing else, just take enough classes to qualify for the assistance, finish the courses, and go about with your life.

-AM

Yup. I got my BA back in 2008 (double-majored in chemistry and Spanish). If I were to back to school, it would be for graduate school.

[Androgynous_Machine]

Yup. I got my BA back in 2008 (double-majored in chemistry and Spanish). If I were to back to school, it would be for graduate school.

Oh a science degree! Good job!

Have you tried applying for jobs in MN?  Many companies would pay to relocate you, some happily so.  Science degrees aren't exactly a dime a dozen.

-AM

[Clarity]

Oh a science degree! Good job!

Have you tried applying for jobs in MN?  Many companies would pay to relocate you, some happily so.  Science degrees aren't exactly a dime a dozen.

-AM

I considered the twin cities back when I was looking for my first job out of college. Thing is, I'm not exactly sure lab work is right for me after my last experience. I've also considered using my Spanish degree to look into something like social work/social justice. I might expand my search to include Minneapolis and St. Paul here to see if that yields any results.

I also remember mostly what I found was jobs through Aerotek. I'm not too pleased with the results I'm getting through their agency in my city so I'm hesitant to use them for anything. I do think they're lying to me about not having anything available constantly for nearly a year now.

[Clarity]

I feel like I'm in an impossible place with my transition. Despite what laws may say, I think a lot of places are going to turn me down over being transgender. It feels like my options are either to detransition so I can get a job (I'd rather die) or only be able to transition partially (again, I'd rather die knowing that I'll just be angry looking at my body every time I take a shower).

Surely there has got to be help out there. Maybe the only really good job possibilities for me are in activism.

[Ginny]

I know this is the time of year that many employers are attending University career fairs.  Are you attending these? I'm graduating in May as a EET, but I know chemistry majors are in pretty decent demand. Also usually larger corporations will have build in discrimination policies because they don't care about your personal life if you can be of value to them. Here is also a link to the most recent corporate equality index. http://www.hrc.org/campaigns/corporate-equality-index (you can also do a basic search based on company name).

Western States with protection laws: CA, WA, OR, CO, NV, NM
Midwest States with protection laws: MN, IA, IL
Southern States with protection laws: None (huh, go figure)
NorthEast States with protection laws: ME, VT, MA, RI, CT, NJ, DE, Washington DC (I also believe PA is also working on getting there eventually)

Hope this helps!
~Jen

P.S. You look gorgeous 

[Jenelle327]

Lol Southern States... I cant wait to get my degree and never look back