Sexual Preference

[kathyk]

Some questions about this have been asked before, yet I didn't track with them because it's difficult to total your preferences with out a poll.  If you want me to add something let me know, but I'm trying to keep this simple. 

[Androgynous_Machine]

This is a difficult answer for me.

I find men and women attractive but never actually did anything to hit on a man much less kissed/slept with.  The idea of doing it as a male grosses me out but doing it as a female would be different.

It might be something I'll explore after I get through my transition a bit.

-AM

[Annabelle]

Hmm I'm a bit weird. I find women physically attractive while I don't find men physically attractive but I find men more emotionally attractive compared to females.

[Hikari]

Hmm I'm a bit weird. I find women physically attractive while I don't find men physically attractive but I find men more emotionally attractive compared to females.

This is something I have noticed in many people that physical attraction and emotional attraction can differ.

I am physically and emotionally attracted to women. Physically men do nothing for me but emotionally they are outright repulsive in a romantic sense. I have no problems with them as friends but the idea of going on a nice romantic dinner with a protective man who thinks I am beautiful is almost sickening... Which now that I think about it seems a bit strange.

[TaoRaven]

I was bi before I started. But lately, I find that although I will appreciate how a woman looks, I am pretty damn man crazy. I check out every man I see, and honestly can't wait until I have the anatomy and passability to start dating.

[Jess42]

Hard to answer other than bi. I like male, female, other transgenders, MTF and FTM. I guess I'm just sexually open and tend to focus more on the emotional connections.

[Catherine Sarah]

Awesome!!! Love the results so far. More men for me to sort through. he he.

[LittleEmily24]

While I like the idea of being hit on by men, I find women infinitely more physically attractive than men ~ male body does absolutely nothing for me, but I do have a sort of appreciation for the male "part"; however, i do like it when a man makes me feel special ~ this is most likely due to the fact that only men have hit on me so far and women have not Maybe i'd have the same reaction if a woman were to hit on me.

[MadelineB]

I would expect the numbers (if the sample is large enough) to come out approximately even among the choices. Which explains why when people leave out bisexual/pansexual and asexual/meh, they get such wildly varying numbers depending on how the question is asked. Assume that it is 25%/25%/25%/25%.
Then when you ask the following questions, you would get these results:

Is your attraction to men? 67% yes, 33% no.
Is your attraction to women? 67% yes, 33% no.
Are you attracted to men? 50% yes, 50% no.
Are you attracted to women? 50% yes, 50% no.
Are you attracted to men and women and otherly identified people? 25% yes, 75% no.
Are you attracted to no one? 25% yes, 75% no.
Is any attraction that you have based on the gender of your partner? 50% yes, 50% no.

And of course that is still a simplification, because romantic and sexual attraction may be different (for example, some asexual people have strong romantic attractions but no sexual attractions). And if the asexual percentage is more like 50%, then the numbers above skew even more.

Here's what I wrote about myself on a singles' site:

I am BISEXUAL/PANSEXUAL. I mostly point this out for the sake of people who might fall in love with me, and then later on realize "OMG I didn't realize you were serious about that." Yes. My attraction or lack of attraction, and my connection, or lack of connection, to any person is based on attributes that are not governed by their sex or gender. In other words, I won't decide I can't date you just because you are a man, or a woman, or because neither fits all the time. I don't care about that. I do care about what kind of a woman, or man, or person you are. Period. I know it's a weird concept for people who have a sex or gender litmus test in their brain that blocks half or more of the human race from the possibility of their wanting to be with that person. I don't have that. And I won't look down on you if you do, but I don't want to know you if you have a problem with my lack of your limitation.

-Maddie

[stephaniec]

I would expect the numbers (if the sample is large enough) to come out approximately even among the choices. Which explains why when people leave out bisexual/pansexual and asexual/meh, they get such wildly varying numbers depending on how the question is asked. Assume that it is 25%/25%/25%/25%.
Then when you ask the following questions, you would get these results:

Is your attraction to men? 67% yes, 33% no.
Is your attraction to women? 67% yes, 33% no.
Are you attracted to men? 50% yes, 50% no.
Are you attracted to women? 50% yes, 50% no.
Are you attracted to men and women and otherly identified people? 25% yes, 75% no.
Are you attracted to no one? 25% yes, 75% no.
Is any attraction that you have based on the gender of your partner? 50% yes, 50% no.

And of course that is still a simplification, because romantic and sexual attraction may be different (for example, some asexual people have strong romantic attractions but no sexual attractions). And if the asexual percentage is more like 50%, then the numbers above skew even more.

Here's what I wrote about myself on a singles' site: -Maddie

very practical and informative

[suzifrommd]

My attraction or lack of attraction, and my connection, or lack of connection, to any person is based on attributes that are not governed by their sex or gender.

That's sort of how I feel. I will date someone I respect and enjoy regardless of sex or gender.

But my attraction is different. The idea of running my hands over a female body is inviting, while the idea of running my hands over a male body is not. OTOH, sex with a male sounds very inviting, while sex with a female does not.

I think that means I'm one confused pup.

[kellibra]

without getting tangled up in emotional vs physical connection, i love women too much to seriously consider men. they have a perfect body, soft and smooth with those 'i-want-the-same-curves' in the right places, preferably long silky hair and so much more. it's no match imho. but men also have this part i am intrigued by for purely sexual reasons and maybe to feel that much more of a woman. when on hrt, who knows how that would change? for now, definitely ggs or women like us

[ErinM]

I have found my interests evolving as I've given up denial and progressed through transition.

I started out as a gyno-romantic asexual. I found women romantically appealing, but had next to no desire for sex.

As I began to accept that I was transgender, I started to also accept that there was some romantic attraction to the occasional man.

It was HRT that finally introduced the idea of sexual attraction into the mix and now I find the target of my attraction swings like a pendulum through the weeks.

[sad panda]

If you are only attracted to men as a woman, aren't you not attracted to men, but attracted to the idea of being a woman who likes men?

Maybe attracted to having control over female sexuality?

[Androgynous_Machine]

If you are only attracted to men as a woman, aren't you not attracted to men, but attracted to the idea of being a woman who likes men?

Maybe attracted to having control over female sexuality?

Hmmm, never looked at it from that point of view.

I look at it as femininity and masculinity are two sides to the same coin.  While submission and dominance play a role I think it is a lot more complicated than that diatomic--for lack of a better word--relationship.  I think the two compliment each other in all aspects of life and I think it's the role of femininity that has my gears going and that alone is attractive.  However, the picture isn't complete without the other half I feel.

-AM

[sad panda]

Hmmm, never looked at it from that point of view.

I look at it as femininity and masculinity are two sides to the same coin.  While submission and dominance play a role I think it is a lot more complicated than that diatomic--for lack of a better word--relationship.  I think the two compliment each other in all aspects of life and I think it's the role of femininity that has my gears going and that alone is attractive.  However, the picture isn't complete without the other half I feel.

-AM

Oh ok, but then when you're presenting as a woman, does the idea of doing anything with a woman gross you out and you only want to do things with men?

[Androgynous_Machine]

Oh ok, but then when you're presenting as a woman, does the idea of doing anything with a woman gross you out and you only want to do things with men?

Hmmm, hard to say.  I'm not purposefully being wishy washy because I'm just starting my transition so it is difficult to really say.  I can only extrapolate from my previous experience and as a male, I didn't harbor fantasies about lesbians nor did I enjoy any of the pornography.  Furthermore my dealings with ciswomen in committed relationships were difficult to put it nicely. 

As a male I had a lot of performance issues (always have) and physical attributes that are no where near manly, as a predictable result had a lot of problems with women in general.

However, If you were to hold a gun to my head I don't think I'd actively seek out women.  Mostly because I didn't do that at any point of my life before (all of my relationships they came to me for whatever reason).    Does it gross me out? No.  Does it stimulate me, while presenting as a woman, to be with a woman? No.

-AM

[ganjina]

Thank you for the nice reads, stuff to think about. As others have mentioned before, I do not seem to put much importance on the gender thing, it's kind of I do not know, both have pros, cons, there are a lot of other things going around in a relationship...

[Michelle69]

I think women are more attractive than men and I still find myself looking at women.(Some habits are  hard to break. ) Now however, the thoughts going through my head are completely different. It's more like-
God I hope my hair will be as beautiful as hers, or I would love to have her figure. I know from experience though that sex with a girl, while fun, is a serious let down now. It's great taking care of her desires, but it ends at that and I am frustrated and wanting more. The thought of me penetrating someone else makes me physically ill.
Odd thing is I prefer the company of women now over men.

Men over forty are not very attractive to me for the most part, but when I think  about sex it's men that I think about. It's incredibly confusing to me, to have so much change so quickly. Kinda scary too.

I've avoided masturbation for the last couple months for several reasons. One, arousal is different for me now, and porn does nothing for me. Two, I don't want to touch it, not for that anyway. It feels... unclean maybe or perverted. Either way it just doesn't feel right.

A few days ago I did masturbate and now avoid it for a completely different reasons.
I was watching a Enrique Iglesias video, OMG! It was too much, something had to give. I buried my face in the back of the sofa, straddled a couple throw pillows and went to town like a good little girl. It was much more intense and took longer than I would have thought, but WOW! Took me over a 1/2 hour to stop shaking. It took a lot out of me and frightened me. I WANT to do it again, but am afraid. Maybe it's time to invest in a magic buzzing wand.

Anyway, to answer your question- men, god help me, and even if I've never been with one, but definitely men.

I hope that wasn't too graphic.

[Androgynous_Machine]

I think women are more attractive than men and I still find myself looking at women.(Some habits are  hard to break. ) Now however, the thoughts going through my head are completely different. It's more like-
God I hope my hair will be as beautiful as hers, or I would love to have her figure. I know from experience though that sex with a girl, while fun, is a serious let down now. It's great taking care of her desires, but it ends at that and I am frustrated and wanting more. The thought of me penetrating someone else makes me physically ill.
Odd thing is I prefer the company of women now over men.

Men over forty are not very attractive to me for the most part, but when I think  about sex it's men that I think about. It's incredibly confusing to me, to have so much change so quickly. Kinda scary too.

I've avoided masturbation for the last couple months for several reasons. One, arousal is different for me now, and porn does nothing for me. Two, I don't want to touch it, not for that anyway. It feels... unclean maybe or perverted. Either way it just doesn't feel right.

A few days ago I did masturbate and now avoid it for a completely different reasons.
I was watching a Enrique Iglesias video, OMG! It was too much, something had to give. I buried my face in the back of the sofa, straddled a couple throw pillows and went to town like a good little girl. It was much more intense and took longer than I would have thought, but WOW! Took me over a 1/2 hour to stop shaking. It took a lot out of me and frightened me. I WANT to do it again, but am afraid. Maybe it's time to invest in a magic buzzing wand.

Anyway, to answer your question- men, god help me, and even if I've never been with one, but definitely men.

I hope that wasn't too graphic.

I think you put it much better than I would have.  When I think about being with a woman it's more about being her than being with her.  When I think about being with a man the feeling and emotion is intense, almost to the point of it being debilitating.

-AM