Coming out at a rate of knots at the moment...

[Ms Grace]

Finding it very hard not to tell people at the moment. I'm still planning to fully transition in June but telling people now means I will have more chances for socialisation presenting as female before full time.

Told an old friend yesterday - he knew me during my first rocky first transition attempt and even though I think I rattled him at that time he still stood by me. He seemed pretty OK with news of my second tilt, he's an easy going guy with a gentle outlook. Told three friends at once tonight (two women and a guy), two are people I've known for about 18 months and the other woman for ten years - they were all very supportive and happy for me - the two women want to take me shopping!

One thing I find really helps with the process of outing myself has been pictures - after I drop the bombshell and answer any immediate questions I get out the iPad and show them some of my better selfies... it stops their imaginations from running wild, picturing "whatever" they think I would look like based on their internalised perception of trans women. They get a chance to see me as I believe I will look and somehow it changes the overall reception to my news, it's as if the support goes up a notch or two. The other thing that helps is having a name ready, because it's one of those things that inevitably gets asked. When they hear the name it must help with the identification process or something.

Being several months along on HRT also makes a difference because I can point to various changes (like boobs). While keeping the whole thing fairly lighthearted I do still make it clear that this is a deeply personal and difficult choice and process. Plus I thank them deeply for their understanding... I certainly got a lot of hugs tonight! Sure, maybe they didn't really understand the full extent of what the deal is for me, but they're happy for me and supportive and that's all I can ask for really.

I don't expect the same level of acceptance from my family but at least I'm learning some useful techniques for when that day arrives...

[Joan]

Good for you Grace! It must be good to be able to let yourself out in more and more places, pushing back the boundaries a bit at a time. Nice to have a few more people onside too.

I'm thinking it's about time I started to do the same. Perhaps I'll start putting together a gallery of usable selfies

[Cindy]

One day soon you are going to come out FT.
When you do you will be told how courageous you are and how good it must be to be yourself.
This from 'normal' people living their normal shadow lives.

At that time I want you to do something. Sit in a corner looking at the wall and think about you.

Then stand up, face the world and say 'there is nothing courageous about being me; what took courage was hiding my true self'

Then be easy. Accept yourself. Love yourself. Be proud.

And reflect; Cindy and Catherine really are bitches, they told me I could do it.

And you did.

Heee Heeeee

[Hikari]

Sounds like it is going pretty good so far. When I told my friends I basically said this os who I am and I won't apologize for being me and they basically just shrugged lol. Turns out they understand it is important to me but just don't care too much which is surprising and comforting.

Hopefully it will continue to be smooth sailing for you.

[Catherine Sarah]

You Go Girl, Grace. I wouldn't be surprised if you went FT early. You're ready for it now. After seeing you the other night, you pulled that off perfectly. You didn't miss a beat.

Cindy's on the money as well. It certainly does take a lot more courage and sheer energy trying to hide the real you, 24/7/365. .

I hope your going to take up the offer of shopping with these 2 women. You'll have an absolute hoot with them. You always learn sooooo much more on shopping trips with other women, plus it's a whole heap of fun. Catch you soon.

Huggs
Catherine

[Eva Marie]

There certainly is a major pull toward just telling the world and getting on with it; I plan to come out in July if everything I am waiting on happens as I think it should, and the waiting is driving me crazy right now. I just want to shout it from the rooftops and have it DONE.

Congrats on the coming out steps you have already completed Ms. Grace  I hope that the remaining ones go just as smoothly.

[Ms Grace]

Thanks so much, ladies!

Perhaps I'll start putting together a gallery of usable selfies

It really seems to make a difference. I use several full length ones of me in various dresses (that way they can tell I'm serious about wearing women's clothing) and my forum avatar for the close up. As my wardrobe expands I'll add to it.

Then stand up, face the world and say 'there is nothing courageous about being me; what took courage was hiding my true self'

I know exactly what you mean. Fortunately, so far I've only had one "you're so brave" - I tried to accept that in the spirit in which it was offered but at one level it rankles.

And reflect; Cindy and Catherine really are bitches, they told me I could do it.

And you did.

Heee Heeeee

Lol, you crack me up, hon!

You Go Girl, Grace. I wouldn't be surprised if you went FT early. You're ready for it now. After seeing you the other night, you pulled that off perfectly. You didn't miss a beat.

I'll admit to having a case of the "can't waits" but I still want to deal with a bit more beard & mo first, but I'm now really going to have to shift my focus to wardrobe and also get a few more practice runs in first. And thanks, I felt so natural and in my element the other week but I want to put myself in some increasingly difficult situations, especially dealing with general public, talking and passing with people who don't know me because I feel very self-conscious in those situations.

I hope your going to take up the offer of shopping with these 2 women. You'll have an absolute hoot with them. You always learn sooooo much more on shopping trips with other women, plus it's a whole heap of fun.

You bet. I did go shopping with gal pals during my first tilt, not anywhere near as much as I should have sadly. Really looking forward to the opportunities this time around.

There certainly is a major pull toward just telling the world and getting on with it; I plan to come out in July if everything I am waiting on happens as I think it should, and the waiting is driving me crazy right now. I just want to shout it from the rooftops and have it DONE.

I so know what you mean! All the best to you too!

[Catherine Sarah]

I'll admit to having a case of the "can't waits" but I still want to deal with a bit more beard & mo first,

Oh dear god girl. Don't let a little hair stand in our way or goodness sake. You're an absolute born natural. The sooner you hit the ground running the sooner you'll be able to

put myself in some increasingly difficult situations, especially dealing with general public, talking and passing with people who don't know me because I feel very self-conscious in those situations.

Looking forward to catching up this Thursday night.

Huggs
Catherine

[Ms Grace]

Oh dear god girl. Don't let a little hair stand in our way or goodness sake. You're an absolute born natural. The sooner you hit the ground running the sooner you'll be able to

I know, I know...but face fuzz is one of those things that I really worry about. I know make-up can be very effective to cover up stray whiskers so I'm going to have to ask for some tips from people in that regard.

Looking forward to catching up this Thursday night.

Sorry, hon - can't make tonight but it's for a good cause...I'm going shoe shopping! Will definitely be there next time though!

BTW, told another work colleague yesterday, admittedly one who will be leaving in two weeks (part oft he reason I wanted her to know) - got a big hug and a "welcome to the sisterhood"!