Quote from: stephaniec on February 21, 2014, 11:11:20 AM
so, unless I'm missing some thing, It's best to change the paper part after GRS. This leaves the RLE part which means in the US all you need to do is walk around every day life in nice jeans and top maybe some make up maybe not and tell everyone your female. or is this too simplified. I'm just trying to figure this out , sorry
In the US it is probably best/easiest to change your papers early in the process. Either at the time you start RLE or shortly
thereafter.
Like you said RLE is simple. Find a presentation that works for you. Come out to all/most of the important people and say this
is my identity, as of now I am living as a female with the name <your name>. I ask for your respect and support.
Some people may well respond, as my sister did "Live as a female? What the f?#* does that mean?"
My response was "I am not sure exactly what it will entail. But I am putting myself out there to society and the world whatever
may come. To do my best to grow into a woman that I am proud of."
To me that is what a "RLE" is. It is living a Real Life. Hopefully by the start of "RLE" you have already grown quite a bit. Grown within yourself. Grown or acquired the level of self acceptance you will need for the challenges ahead. You have dreams and vision of the woman you want to be. Acknowledging and announcing that you are embarking on another stage of growth. You are now at a a public stage in this process. To continue growing you need to come out of your shell. You are a flower breaking through the earth. To grow into a new identity. To grow into a transfigured, transformed body. To grow into, and push against societal norms and expectations. To live a new life -- the life of a woman with a transexual history.
This certainly got all rambley.... I think my point is at some point a person needs to state their identity. It is probably really helpful to have a name change to help document that date. But to me the proof is when are you willing to take the risk required to live that life and that identity.
Truly nothing external is needed to live that life. FFS, documents, HRT, SRS, skirts, makeup, whatever none of that makes you a woman. Though these artifacts and attributes may surely help others see you as a woman. And they may surely help protect and strengthen your resolve, may help you see a woman within.
Living a life out loud, stating your truth out loud. That is a "RLE"
This is my truth for what it is worth.
Best Wishes,
Elaina
