I won't look at your pictures or make comments on the accuracy of your boyfriends assessment, but he is an ass. Make no mistake about that. If he truly loves you he would not make such comments. In fact, he would not care about such things. He shouldn't even notice such things, and if he did he should love you for being just the way you are.
I have come to realize there is (often) a big problem in dating cis people. Any deviation form the norm they can see in us they ascribe to our condition. In simple terms they are holding us responsible for masculine traits that we may have, something they'd never do if we were cis. Cis people often confuse being a good friend with being an oppressive ass. They think they are being helpful and kind when they rub our noses in our flaws.
I've wasted a lot of time on dating and trying to ahve meaningful relationships with cis men. All of my relationships have been bad. I'm not saying such a relationship is impossible, but from my experience they are unlikely. Most often cis men aren't pure in their motives when they date us. They like to think they are, but they always end up saying or doing something that reveals they don't really think of us as real women, because if they did they wouldn't say or do such things. Cis people like to hold us to an impossible standard that they don't even hold themselves to. Inappropriate treatment of trans-people is totally okay in the cis world. They even think they are being kind and helpful when they do it O_o
I like men. I really do. I think they are sex and they have the ability to make me feel attractive and good about myself. Recently though, it has occurred to me that I haven't been completely innocent myself in perpetuating my relationship troubles. I was talking to a friend who mentioned that what she thought of as most important in a relationship was not so much the sex but rather things as having a nice dinner and a deep meaningful conversation. Thinking back on my relationship I have come to realize the men I've been with have merely been props with really hard penises attached to them. Sure the sex is great for the 10-15 minutes it lasts, but the rest of the time I've been spending with a one-dimensional being who's sole purpose is to be an instrument in my pursuit of what I deem to be an appropriate role as a woman. It has left me feeling rather lonely and empty. Next time around I'm going to substitute the rock-hard-penis check box on my list with soul-mate check box, even if it means being in an asexual relationship. Hell, even being single for the rest of my life is better than that. Life is simply to short and precious to be wasted on hollow relationships who's sole purpose is to conform to some crazy shallow idea of what is to be a woman.
I never understood how trans people could possibly want to be in relationships with each other. A few years back I went to Thailand for a BA. At the clinic there were two patients who were obviously in a relationship. I thought it was preposterous and I just couldn't understand them. Today however, after realizing what a hollow existence I've been living I realize that they are probably the happier and smarter of us. Being in a relationship with someone who understand what it is like and never ever judge must be peace of mind if one can figure out how to make such a thing work.
Sorry about the rant. I just have a lot on my mind these days. I wish you the best of luck with your relationship endeavors. Just be careful expecting cis people to act in your best interest. They rarely do, even when they try to.
