Girl Talk?

[Lisbeth]

I am post-menopausal but my best girlfriend accuses me of PMSing all the time. Girls talk about their periods all the time, it is not considered personal at all.

I do get PMS, and one day last year I commented to one of my coworkers who knows my history, "I hate this time of month."  She told me, "It comes with the territory, so suck it up."

[Wing Walker]

We, as a gender, talk about everything from the guys in our lives, kids, sex, money, menstruation, vaginal itches, recipes, knitting, the boss, whatever.  There are far fewer barriers or limits on conversation among women than there are among males. 

On my second day at work I was given a test by a woman who knew me as a good friend.  She came to my office and asked if her vaginal irritation could be from using her bathtub.  I asked her to sit down and I calmly told her what I thought without so much as taking a deep breath.

Whatever the question or the answer, be cool.  That's the way we are.

Wing Walker
Too Old to Carry Tampons

P.S.  LOL w/ Lisbeth!!!

[tao]

hi, y'all. julie here. i'm sorry, but this whole thing is sooo funny. First of all, under the circumstances you described, your girlfriend's question wasn't a question at all. it was rhetorical. it was a statement. She was saying you were being bitchy. The typical answer to that question if you're PMSing is usually similar to one of the following: **** OFF, GO **** YOURSELF. I raised 4 girls, been married twice,worked for 30 years with only ladies. I assure you that a response like the ones i mentioned are not only appropriate, but expected
hugs
julie

[Suzy]

I assure you that a response like the ones i mentioned are not only appropriate, but expected
hugs
julie

Gee, Julie, maybe we have the same daughter and never knew it!

Kristi

[tao]

 
btw, kristi, i'm trying to put my picture here but can't find where to post it in the profile. only found the avatar menu. HELP!!!
julie
ps, sorry i'm off topic, won't do it again....

[Lisbeth]

I think you have to make 15 posts before it will let you add your picture.

[Sarah]

So
Here, I thought of a way to answer this as I do not think lying is healthy.

There are ways to redirect, and be honest without showing someone your skelleton.

Skillful means.

I would probably say:
"oh, no, sorry, I have a really irregular period.  I just have some hormone issues. I have been seeing a doctor about it." and to ellaborate " I've had some stuff go on for a long time."

There. That way you are not lying, you DO have an irregular (as innot regular period [it doesn't exist after all, very un-regular]) you are not on your period, but it is honest, and helps explain why it might come up again.

That way they actually feel for you, provides an honest(but not full) explaination of why you might take homones if they see you-"my doctor thinks it will help my hormone issues."

Honest, easy, redirected. No Lying, just skillful redirection. Some Verbal Aikido.

That's my suggestion

[SarahFaceDoom]

Wow this really isn't a hard one.

No one is going to ask you if you have a period.  Because if they think you are a girl, that question is stupid.  And if they think you're a male, that question is stupid.  They'll ask if you are having your period.  In which case you just say "no".  Because you're not.  And then move on.

Telling the truth is oftentimes more effective than lying.

Plus if you infer to one girl that you have periods.  And another girl reads you.  And then those two women interact and chat about you.  They're going to think you're a liar and not really have much compassion for you.

[Sarah]

Wow this really isn't a hard one.

No one is going to ask you if you have a period.  Because if they think you are a girl, that question is stupid.  And if they think you're a male, that question is stupid.  They'll ask if you are having your period.  In which case you just say "no".  Because you're not.  And then move on.

Telling the truth is oftentimes more effective than lying.

Plus if you infer to one girl that you have periods.  And another girl reads you.  And then those two women interact and chat about you.  They're going to think you're a liar and not really have much compassion for you.

True.
Best advice yet.

[IsabelleStPierre]

One of the worst things in the world that you can do...in my opinion at least...is to lie. Lies have a way of coming back around to bite you in the ass...and you know what...woman expect men to lie...not other woman! I know everyone will most likely jump all over me for this one...but lying is a very 'male' way to deal with things...but that too is just my opinion

Peace and love,
Isabelle St-Pierre

who seems to be in one pissy mood tonight

[Keira]

Yeah, but Isabelle, are you really going to say everything about yourself to a random person, or to an acquaintance. Most people lie in part about their background to not have to go into details into things that you would not be comfortable discussing. If someone becomes a close friend, then its ok to disclose, but there is a limit to how open you want to be with someone you barely know. Better lie. They usually understand the rationale if eventually you become friends.

[IsabelleStPierre]

Yeah, but Isabelle, are you really going to say everything about yourself to a random person, or to an acquaintance. Most people lie in part about their background to not have to go into details into things that you would not be comfortable discussing. If someone becomes a close friend, then its ok to disclose, but there is a limit to how open you want to be with someone you barely know. Better lie. They usually understand the rationale if eventually you become friends.

You don't need to lie to someone about anything, I am selective in what I will tell someone and that is not lying. If someone I have just met asks something I'm not comfortable talking about I just tell them that...believe it or not most people are happy to accept that and most are actually understanding on that standpoint. I personally don't believe in lying when there isn't a really good reason to...

One thing that people either find refreshing about me or completely frustrating is my total lack of a filter and the fact that I won't lie to them...what I think just comes out. At work it wasn't uncommon for people to seek me out to run an idea past me to get an opinion...because they knew I would tell them like I saw it...now with a ton of experience in the area I would also provide constructive advice on how to improve a shaky idea...

I can understand people telling little white lies to help protect a friends feelings...but at the same time...if that dress doesn't look good on them...don't you think they really would rather hear that before they go out on that date???

I live by words and my word is something that is important to me...

But that's just me.

Peace and love,
Isabelle St-Pierre

[Sarah]

I think you can be honest with people without disclosing everything.

I don't think full disclosure is nessicarily being honest. It's actually kinda harmful to give out too much information.

I don't think we have to chose between lying and full details, we can just answer in a way that is truthful, and satisfies their question, yet not giving them the kitchen sink.

I mean some details are non of someones business, and we don't have to lie to avoid answering a difficult question directly. Polititians do it all the time, when they go before a congressional hearing. They don't answer yes or no, they just say "If we had 'this' we would be able to do 'that'" it's not a lie, and it does answer the question, it's just not giving a direct yes or no.

[nickie]

Avoid it, until you are post menopausal, like me.

[Lisbeth]

Heh.  Some weeks ago I was in a BECAUSE planning meeting, and my gynocologist had upped my estradiol prescription to the point that I was getting morning sickness.  In this meeting I commented that at least I wasn't too old to get morning sickness, and a woman who is a friend looked startled and said, "Are you pregnant?!" 

[spx_1112]

Periods pregnancies. All of that is common girl talk. Hugs Shannon