Transitioning with a professional career.

[Whynaut]

Hey all,

I'm new here and just wanted to say hi, and ask for some advice with this issue. I'm in my mid-20s and just getting out of grad school to start my career as a high school teacher. Teachers are constantly in the spotlight of the community, making transitioning extremely difficult.

I'm moving forward with transitioning to the point where I may start T soon. Currently, I intern as a teacher and attend my classes in the evening. My problem is that my current students see me as female, but I want to start my career, this September, as male. Which means it would be ideal to interview as male. Teacher interviews happen from now until September.

I've thought about interviewing as androgynous/gender neutral and coming out to my boss when I sign my contract, letting them know I will be entering as male. Another option is transitioning over the summer (maybe start T in May) and just hoping there are jobs left at the end of summer. A third option is to spend my first year as female and transition over the summer if my admin is supportive.

I've also thought about just starting T now, which will give me the longest time THIS summer to interview. But it also means my current students and colleagues will notice changes (namely, my voice). Are there any medical lies to cover up a deeper voice? Could I just say I got my tonsils out or I had a terrible case of bronchitis?

I'm just looking for suggestions and options here. I am small, with a feminine voice so it'd be difficult to pass in interviews without T.

[androidnick]

I'm in a similar situation as you. I graduate in 2 months. However I started T during December. And I filed for my name change a week ago so I can get my name and gender marker correct when I apply for positions. I suggest you start the process soon if you think you are ready. I know that people can have pretty ->-bleeped-<-ty reactions and the fact that you are around kids could be seen as a potential "distraction". Which is EXACTLY why I am doing everything now. I'll either work in a middle or high school and dont want drama. And trust me it will be a while before your voice changes. You likely wouldn't see a voice change until summer time. So you'd be fine as an intern. That is unless you do some form of summer school. Good luck to you

[Bimmer Guy]

Hey all,

I'm new here and just wanted to say hi, and ask for some advice with this issue. I'm in my mid-20s and just getting out of grad school to start my career as a high school teacher. Teachers are constantly in the spotlight of the community, making transitioning extremely difficult.

I'm moving forward with transitioning to the point where I may start T soon. Currently, I intern as a teacher and attend my classes in the evening. My problem is that my current students see me as female, but I want to start my career, this September, as male. Which means it would be ideal to interview as male. Teacher interviews happen from now until September.

I've thought about interviewing as androgynous/gender neutral and coming out to my boss when I sign my contract, letting them know I will be entering as male. Another option is transitioning over the summer (maybe start T in May) and just hoping there are jobs left at the end of summer. A third option is to spend my first year as female and transition over the summer if my admin is supportive.

I've also thought about just starting T now, which will give me the longest time THIS summer to interview. But it also means my current students and colleagues will notice changes (namely, my voice). Are there any medical lies to cover up a deeper voice? Could I just say I got my tonsils out or I had a terrible case of bronchitis?

I'm just looking for suggestions and options here. I am small, with a feminine voice so it'd be difficult to pass in interviews without T.

I would start T as soon as possible and interview as male.  Entering the school system you are going to teach in for the next 40 years as your identified gender is more important I would think than any short term discomfort with your current students.

[androidnick]

I would start T as soon as possible and interview as male.  Entering the school system you are going to teach in for the next 40 years as your identified gender is more important I would think than any short term discomfort with your current students.

Exactly. And unfortunately news travels. And people are jerks. I know that the school that my mother teaches in, well let's just say the adults act worse than children. There is nothing wrong with being trans. That being said, it is your business and you should keep it that way until you can tell what type of environment you will be working in.

[Arch]

Teaching is a tricky career for trans people. FTMs are better off than MTFs, and high school is probably better than elementary or middle school. But you can still face discrimination. Frankly, I would expect it. So it's better to be read as male when you interview, and to be legally male by the time you have to fill out employment paperwork.

I don't know much about your situation, but maybe you should start presenting as male NOW or at least change your name (if needed) and start T immediately. You cannot predict when your voice will go into male range, but you can always talk higher if it changes faster than expected. On the other hand, you can't really sound male before you sound male. It could take a few months or a few years for you to get into male range. Also, you can sound like a guy but not look like one, so you might "pass" over the phone but not in person.

Do you have a T plan? An informed consent clinic, or a doctor who is willing to prescribe now?

[Whynaut]

I realize teachers are in the spotlight, which is unfortunate for trans* people. I realize I might hit some discrimination if I interview as female -- luckily I live in an extremely LGBT friendly part of the country. There was a big local news story about a MtF transitioning over the summer with positive results. Still, I would rather not risk it.

Thanks for the advice everyone. I was worried about my current situation, which is reasonable, but I should focus on my future career. Since first year teachers are dependent on reference letters from their cooperating teachers and supervisors, I will have to come out to them so they can write letters using correct pronouns. Any advice on that front?

Outside of my classes and internship, I am presenting as male. I do always have this worry that I will see one of my students outside of school, but I teach in a neighboring town so it isn't too likely.

As for a doctor, I have an appointment with a ND tomorrow, and this clinic specializes in trans medicine. On the phone, the receptionist asked if this was an appointment for hormones and I said yes, which sounds promising. Their website explains the process clearly [first appointment is for check up and blood work, second is starting HRT] without mention of a therapist letter or anything.

[Arch]

Since first year teachers are dependent on reference letters from their cooperating teachers and supervisors, I will have to come out to them so they can write letters using correct pronouns. Any advice on that front?

I was wondering about this. You will obviously have to come out to some people. I would start at the top, myself.

If you already have your first appointment set, you might be able to get your first shot in a week. You don't need the nurse for that. But you might need to see the doctor to get the actual scrip. Anyway, I think it's good that you are starting the process now.

[Whynaut]

I am grateful for all the replies to this topic as it's one that has been causing me unending anxiety. I do feel a bit better after getting advice from you guys. Especially because it coincides with what I had assumed was my best course of action.

I'm hoping I can get my hormones started in a week or two -- wow, this feels so unreal.

I'm still up for any advice relating to transitioning while starting, or holding, a career. Has anyone else struggled with the issues surrounding this? I sometimes kick myself for not transitioning earlier, but I didn't actually think it was possible. Plus, I was working through some other stuff. I guess everyone starts at a different time, huh?

[aleon515]

I was a teacher. I think well what you do right away is one thing ,but it is not going to get easier to transition, and unless you want to teach 25+ years in the wrong gender it might be easier to start now. Of course there are issues with transitioning. There is a MTF on susan's who transitioned and stayed in the same school. She might respond to you if you post in the "transgender talk" section. I don't think she had a hard time at all (she lives in Baltimore, which is quite LGBT friendly at least relatively).

If I had stayed for another year, I would have had to come out. I taught for one year. I believe that I had 3 months or so where things were increasingly uncomfortable for me. (I started on T in March). But I did survive it.

--Jay

[Arch]

I sometimes kick myself for not transitioning earlier, but I didn't actually think it was possible. Plus, I was working through some other stuff.

This is a concise way of summing up my own situation.

I came out to my uni in my grad school application, so everyone knew about me. But I didn't transition for years after that. By the time I finally reached rock bottom, I was a regular instructor there and had to come out all over again, but this time I announced that I was transitioning.

Everyone, and I mean everyone, was very nice about it. But it was damned tricky for me to stay sane through the whole thing, so I'm glad that I wasn't working full time then. I also got "lucky" (it didn't feel that way at the time) and was not rehired during a budget crisis. So less than a year after I started T and about six months after top surgery, I found myself unemployed.

As it turned out, I needed that time to work through my divorce, the resultant move, a whole process of learning how to be single and how to live alone, and a very hairy time of anguish and self-doubt. I was learning how to handle both physical and emotional changes from hormones, too.

Even if you are not going through a breakup, you will be starting a new career and going through transition. So I would advise you not to underestimate how difficult it will be. Expect some emotional fluctuations. If you don't have them, all the better. Expect heightened assertiveness and possibly a bit more aggression. If nothing happens, great. Expect to be physically tired; a lot of guys find that they need more sleep early in transition.

I also found that I was unable to sit still for long, and my attention span was pretty much nil. It took me a long time to get these effects under control. Some things seem to have permanently changed; I just have to do the best I can and live with what I've been handed. I had a very dramatic response to T and to transition generally, and it has been a rough ride. But if you can get through the first couple of years pretty gracefully, you will be way ahead of where I was. And I don't think most guys have it too hard once they actually start the process.

[Sarah Louise]

I did Paralegal work for a couple of Law Offices, after many hints to some of the other women who worked there I just came in one day as myself.  Most of the women weren't surprised, a couple of the male lawyers were.

It all worked out and I was accepted.

[Whynaut]

I was a teacher. I think well what you do right away is one thing ,but it is not going to get easier to transition, and unless you want to teach 25+ years in the wrong gender it might be easier to start now. Of course there are issues with transitioning. There is a MTF on susan's who transitioned and stayed in the same school. She might respond to you if you post in the "transgender talk" section. I don't think she had a hard time at all (she lives in Baltimore, which is quite LGBT friendly at least relatively).

If I had stayed for another year, I would have had to come out. I taught for one year. I believe that I had 3 months or so where things were increasingly uncomfortable for me. (I started on T in March). But I did survive it.

--Jay

It's great to get advice from other people who are or have been teachers. I'll have to make a post in the transgender talk section to open it up. I live in a pretty LGBT friendly place but it'd be nice if I could just get hired as male.

It's cool to hear you started T in March because I just got m blood pulled today and my doc says the results should be back in a couple days, at which time she will write my prescription and we'll do the first shot. I can't wait. I had blood work done last year and I was fine so hopefully everything is still peachy. She also offered to write me a letter for name and gender change to take to the courthouse but I'm unsure of what I want my name to be so I'm waiting a bit on that.

Even if you are not going through a breakup, you will be starting a new career and going through transition. So I would advise you not to underestimate how difficult it will be. Expect some emotional fluctuations. If you don't have them, all the better. Expect heightened assertiveness and possibly a bit more aggression. If nothing happens, great. Expect to be physically tired; a lot of guys find that they need more sleep early in transition.

This is great advice. I'm having trouble convincing myself how difficult this will be but I feel ready for the challenge. In fact, not being ready for the challenge is likely what held me back for so long. I thought it was too weird, too expensive, and it was something other people did.

I'm lucky to have a group of supportive friends, because the emotional roller coaster of searching for a job is enough to drive people crazy without transitioning. Heightened assertiveness sounds like it could be helpful in finding a job.

I did Paralegal work for a couple of Law Offices, after many hints to some of the other women who worked there I just came in one day as myself.  Most of the women weren't surprised, a couple of the male lawyers were.

It all worked out and I was accepted.

I'm glad it worked out great for you. Your story gives me hope. :]

[new name]

In almost any workplace, I recommend a diversity campaign prior to someone's transition.  In a school environment, you can limit the diversity campaign to only the teacher's lounge if it's going to be an issue elsewhere.  Speak to the people in charge and see if you can start a diversity program where table cards or posters are displayed in celebration of certain months, including pride month.  Come pride month, put up posters or table cards with pictures and bios of out transgender people and LGB people.  This way all the teachers can see that transgender people are just like everyone else, other than being trans.  It will also pave the way socially for your transition.