So this weekend, my wife went out of town with the kiddo to go visit one of her best friends from high school. I hastily took the opportunity to get into girl mode for a full weekend because well, why not?!
Well when the weekend began, I was hell-bent on getting out into the world as myself and embarking on my first real life experience as a woman. To prepare, I spent a couple of hours getting my wig looking in tip-top shape, making sure I had my outfit picked out and everything was ready to go so I decided it was time. My body is already hairless, so I just did a touch up on my chest, and shaved my face, put on some make-up and was pleased with my look. Tried on a few different shirts after the one I initally picked out just looked bad on me, settled on my look, grabbed my purse and took a quick look in the mirror before I left. Bam! Not even a couple hours after shaving my beard shadow was prominent through the make-up. I tried touching it up, but it just was futile, so I decided today would not be the day I am going out.
So then I figured, "what the heck, I am hungry and dressed up, might as well get some delivery so I can at least interact with a stranger as a woman" and Papa John's had been teasing me with the images of their Double Cheeseburger Pizza so it all just made sense.
Staring in the mirror, for the first time I realized that I when I am in girl-mode I never actually talk! I'm usually alone by myself and am not really big on talking to myself, so I recorded my voice for the first time and played it back. Oh my lord it was awful! I start freaking out knowing that I am going to have to say SOMETHING in the next 30 minutes when the pizza guy gets here with my steaming hot pie. I scour YouTube looking for vocal lessons and start trying several different things. I figure out a way to sound somewhat feminine but almost as silly-sounding as a falsetto voice. The door bell rings. It will have to do!
I open the door, and am greeted by a sweet little lady, probably in her late 50's. She was very polite, and asked me how I was... I just stared at her for a second and then trying to remember how to speak in a voice blurted out "oh I'm good!" in a crackled voice that was reminiscent of my middle-school days. I signed the receipt, fumbled around with my gestures and must have looked like some drug-riddled freak to her, but when she left she said "Thanks, sweetie" and smiled and I felt a little bit better.
It wasn't exactly what I had in mind, but I guess it was a start!
After that I was texting a friend and she decided to call me in response to the text. I got scared and threw my phone because I am just not ready to converse as a female yet and I don't want to use my male voice. So after the weekend I have decided to have a shift in my priorities:
1) VOICE THERAPY
2) Laser Hair Removal
3) Hair transplants
4) Vocal Feminzation Surgery - Yosan magic
5) FFS
6) SRS
Now I am back in guy mode, but I feel more feminine than ever. It was truly a great weekend even if it didn't go quite according to plan. The hormones are definitely doing something, but I don't feel like I have changed too much.
