Is it just me?

[JulieC.]

I would say without exception that every person I have come out to has asked the same question first.  So are you gay?  Honestly, I haven't come out to that many people.  Certainly not everyone I know but I was curious if everyone else has had that same experience.  Do you think it's because we are under the LGBQT banner that people think we must be gay or lesbian?  Or do you think most of us are gay or at least bi? 

BTW my answer is "I don't know but I like women".  I still have the junk so I'm not sure if that makes me straight or lesbian.  In reality maybe I am bi.  I have had sex with both men and women in that past.  As far as the future I'm not sure how much sex I'm going to have but I can only see it with a woman. 

[peky]

I would say without exception that every person I have come out to has asked the same question first.  So are you gay?  Honestly, I haven't come out to that many people.  Certainly not everyone I know but I was curious if everyone else has had that same experience.  Do you think it's because we are under the LGBQT banner that people think we must be gay or lesbian?  Or do you think most of us are gay or at least bi? 

BTW my answer is "I don't know but I like women".  I still have the junk so I'm not sure if that makes me straight or lesbian.  In reality maybe I am bi.  I have had sex with both men and women in that past.  As far as the future I'm not sure how much sex I'm going to have but I can only see it with a woman.

I answer this kind of question with another question... "why, are you interested?" ...that just left them frozen in their track and speechless... I usually lough after that...and the dummies most often than not do also lough at it... so everybody happy and no answer provided..

[Jessica Merriman]

It is not just you. I had that come up in every single coming out moment. 

[Gina Taylor]

I would say without exception that every person I have come out to has asked the same question first.  So are you gay?  Honestly, I haven't come out to that many people.  Certainly not everyone I know but I was curious if everyone else has had that same experience.  Do you think it's because we are under the LGBQT banner that people think we must be gay or lesbian?  Or do you think most of us are gay or at least bi? 

BTW my answer is "I don't know but I like women".  I still have the junk so I'm not sure if that makes me straight or lesbian.  In reality maybe I am bi.  I have had sex with both men and women in that past.  As far as the future I'm not sure how much sex I'm going to have but I can only see it with a woman.

Y'know Julie, I get asked the same question. Most times I tell them that I'm the woman and he's the man so go figure. But honestly, I've always seen myself as a bi-sexual person, but I do tend to lean more towards the male sex. 

[Rachel]

I get that too.

I really like Peck's answer and I will use it, thanks.

[Jason C]

I think it's because people often think sexuality and gender are closely linked, when they're separate.

[piglet smith]

No one irl has ever asked me that. My dad at the time even said that he was glad that I turned out to be trans rather than gay. I have no idea why, but that's just the way he thought.

[Feather]

I answer this kind of question with another question... "why, are you interested?" ...that just left them frozen in their track and speechless...

Priceless! 

[Ms Grace]

Not one person has asked me that. Maybe they're just assuming it. Now that I'm presenting as female at work where the women are all hetro I'm noticing a definite unspoken assumption that I'm also into guys. I'm still working on bedding down my gender presentation (so to speak) before I start to worry about my sexual orientation and expression. It's weird how outing as trans* opens the gates for all sorts of inappropriate questions most people would never ask.

[barbie]

Most people are not interested in the differences between gay and transgender. I sometimes clearly state that I am sexually more attracted to women than men. Fortunately, women tend to become closer to me when I wear skirts and makeup. They seem to admire me 

barbie~~

[Adam (birkin)]

I'm pretty sure most people just assumed I was a "lesbian." I don't think anyone's ever asked it but they made references to me having girlfriends etc without me telling them anything to let them know that,

[suzifrommd]

I'm totally weird in that I love when people ask me questions about my transition.

People are so poorly educated about transgender and we are the only people who can give them the straight story. I take questions like this as an opportunity to educate - explaining the difference between gender identity and sexual orientation, and giving a little bit of a window into what transition is really all about.

[Shantel]

I really like Pecky's reply best, I suppose it beats "You are ->-bleeped-<-ting me right?" 

[Edge]

I've been asked if I'm gay or assumed to be gay because most of my exes are men.

[Veronica M]

Y'know Julie, I get asked the same question. Most times I tell them that I'm the woman and he's the man so go figure. But honestly, I've always seen myself as a bi-sexual person, but I do tend to lean more towards the male sex. 

I am somewhat with Gina on this... But, one has to really look at gender vs. Sexual preference. For me, as a women, I would consider my self heterosexual as once I have fully come out and transitioned I desire a relationship with a guy. But, with that said, in the process of transitioning I have put the sex on the back burner to get a clearer picture of what I am doing. 

[Gina Taylor]

I am somewhat with Gina on this... But, one has to really look at gender vs. Sexual preference. For me, as a women, I would consider my self heterosexual as once I have fully come out and transitioned I desire a relationship with a guy. But, with that said, in the process of transitioning I have put the sex on the back burner to get a clearer picture of what I am doing.

Y'know Veronica, I really like your way of thinking. Probably when I get more into my transition, I'll probably think more like you and will be putting sex on the back burner as well. Right now I'm just enjoying life as a woman and all the little perks that comes with it! 

[Christine Eryn]

In my experience, changing genders always meant you were gay by default. Even my first HRT doctor insisted I was probably gay.  If anything, I'm slightly bi but being questioned on preference has never bothered me.

[Shantel]

In my experience, changing genders always meant you were gay by default. Even my first HRT doctor insisted I was probably gay.  If anything, I'm slightly bi but being questioned on preference has never bothered me.

Not a chance! I've never had any gay proclivities whatsoever and I resent people who make assumptions like that as sexual preference has absolutely nothing to do with gender. You know what they say about those who assume...

[Veronica M]

Y'know Veronica, I really like your way of thinking. Probably when I get more into my transition, I'll probably think more like you and will be putting sex on the back burner as well. Right now I'm just enjoying life as a woman and all the little perks that comes with it! 

Sweetie I am just starting down this path. It was only a few months back I hit the wall. Thanks to a very good therapist I am just now coming to terms with something I have had to deal with for 40+ years. I was a total train wreck... LOL Never the less, thank you for your kind words, they do not fall on deaf ears. (or in this case eyes) 

[Veronica M]

Not a chance! I've never had any gay proclivities whatsoever and I resent people who make assumptions like that as sexual preference has absolutely nothing to do with gender. You know what they say about those who assume...

While I don't really resent peoples ignorance, as it would just mess with my thoughts, I completely agree. My view, is what ever floats your boat do it, but it has nothing to do with gender.