lonely in transition

[Riley Skye]

One of the toughest parts of my transition is not knowing any younger college age trans girls, every young trans person I know is FAAB. In that sense transition is lonely and the scene where I live sucks! Honestly I would love to know a MAAB trans person who has been transitioning awhile like I have.

[AnneB]

Without saying where.. have you looked into finding a trans support group there at school?  Might I suggest you take a stroll down to the Pysch Dept and ask any of the professors or counselors there if they know of any groups around.  I know there is at least one at ASU.  Just an idea..   I wish you luck, hon! 

[Riley Skye]

I am part of the trans community but it's pretty much all FAAB trans people

[Joanna Dark]

I am part of the trans community but it's pretty much all FAAB trans people

Yeah I go to a support group sometimes, havent been in two weeks, but it was mainly FTMs and MTFs who are transitioning and are only thinking about it. I feel so out of place. The only reason I go out all is the one moderator is really nice to me. I think she likes me but who knows. She's prolly just being nice. But if you have female friends then what's the dilly o? I guess you want someone to commiserate with. Well, what about LearningtoLive...you guys live in the same general vicinity, Great NYC near or around Long Island.

[Kyra553]

Must be nice to at least have friends. Ive pretty much  given up on trying to find local friends. Seems all I can do is, to get people interested initially then they just disappear or ignore me. I also have a joke of a local trans community in Kansas. It's very small or it's over four hours away. Count yourself lucky for having people to be with. Some of us just have this forum for social interactions. :/

[Christine167]

You'll always be a friend to us Kyra.

Personally, my therapist has been the one to put me in touch with other like me. Transwomen in our mid to late thirties. This might be an avenue for you if your therapist is willing to help.

[Chelsey]

I have felt so alone for so long its not funny... I have been fighting this feeling of being female since I can remember and its always there i went on steroids worst mistake just made me super big and still female tattoos i purposely got to screw myself up. My therapist doesnt deal with gender issues and she didnt believe me till I went on hrt by myself and ended up in the psych ward for saying i was mtf and i had developed c cups but i was still kinda muscley... but she finally acknowldged it... as well as my psychiatrist but she doesnt deal with it either... so idk anymore... I feel like im stuck in between!

[Kyra553]

You'll always be a friend to us Kyra.

Personally, my therapist has been the one to put me in touch with other like me. Transwomen in our mid to late thirties. This might be an avenue for you if your therapist is willing to help.

Thanks Christine 

The best my therapist has ever done over these past five months. Has been informing me that appling for an endo appt can take several months. I've honestly had no other benefit then hearing "yeah, ok, how do you, yodda yodda" Then I just get asked the same thing every time I visit.  She wrote my letter for hrt approval, so I guess I'm happy after spending $20 a session every week.     (She makes like $120 with insurance pay every 45 mins!! I feel like I'm being robbed...)

[Riley Skye]

I really like the support group I go to but I feel like no one can really relate to me there being that I'm the youngest trans girl by at least 15 years+

[stephaniec]

I really like the support group I go to but I feel like no one can really relate to me there being that I'm the youngest trans girl by at least 15 years+

you shouldn't feel this way. You don't get a magic card that lets you skip all the problems of being younger and go directly to your 30's and 40's. they all very much understand your situation. Just jump in and get the answers you need. They have a lot of experience like you have the experience of seeing things from your own particular perspective. They'd probably be interested in what's going on with your age level. you get the bonus of seeing future obstacles to avoid

[Riley Skye]

you shouldn't feel this way. You don't get a magic card that lets you skip all the problems of being younger and go directly to your 30's and 40's. they all very much understand your situation. Just jump in and get the answers you need. They have a lot of experience like you have the experience of seeing things from your own particular perspective. They'd probably be interested in what's going on with your age level. you get the bonus of seeing future obstacles to avoid

The thing is I really I would love to know a trans girl going through what I'm going through. Honestly I don't want to hangout much with older women, I'd rather be with people my own age. They're nice an all but I want to be with younger people.

[stephaniec]

The thing is I really I would love to know a trans girl going through what I'm going through. Honestly I don't want to hangout much with older women, I'd rather be with people my own age. They're nice an all but I want to be with younger people.

I don't know , for myself Susan's is the only place I associate with other trans. Most of my acquaintances come from starbucks.   

[Lady_Oracle]

The thing is I really I would love to know a trans girl going through what I'm going through. Honestly I don't want to hangout much with older women, I'd rather be with people my own age. They're nice an all but I want to be with younger people.

Same here! I'm in my early 20s and really wish I had someone around my own age in transition like me. When I was a the start of transition this was something I wanted really badly but now it's getting to the point I just don't care anymore honestly. I know that until I move out of my town and somewhere west, I won't have the kind of community I've been dreaming of living in. One day though it'll happen! I'm in dire need of a fresh start somewhere new!

[Sincerely Tegan]

Gosh, Riley, I'm sorry. There's nothing quite so discouraging as feeling alone while surrounded by other people. I think everyone here can speak to that on at least some level.

Just keep putting your feelers out there- I'm sure there's someone in your general area going through the same as you. Maybe they're in Susan's already, or maybe they have yet to discover it.

And as has already been pointed out, you're not alone when you're here.

What exactly is it that you want to discuss, anyway?

Happy Friday!

-Teg

[Kyra553]

The thing is I really I would love to know a trans girl going through what I'm going through. Honestly I don't want to hangout much with older women, I'd rather be with people my own age. They're nice an all but I want to be with younger people.

Your welcome to pm me if want to talk about stuff. It gives us something to look forward to everyday at least.

[Katherine]

Hi all, I know how many of you feel.  I'm 60 and going through transition (again).  It would be such a help to have a local mtf in transition to sit and talk with over a coffee or something.  Support groups are not local to me and my work prevents me from traveling to attend.  I was once told in a thread reference this that there should be x number of transgendered people living near me based on population.  Theories are all nice, but the reality is very different.  I'm sure there are a few in the area, but I'm guessing that they, like me, are very private and cautious about revealing themselves.  Chat, emails, etc., are nice, but honestly they are not the same as sitting down and actually talking with someone.  Back when I was seeing a therapist she never introduced me to any of her other girls, perhaps that's just not done.  Anyway, I guess we just deal with it and hope that sooner or later we'll actually meet another like ourselves.

[AnneB]

May be an idea to check with your therapist to ask her/him, if any of the other trans girl patients in the area would like to meet.. The doc would have to ask each one during their sessions..  Might be a bit unsettling for one on one coffee meeting tho, but might be an impetus, also, for your therapist to get a support/chat group together maybe once a month..   I met up with one of my work friends who just completed her transition, for breakfast at an IHOP, where I told her of my dysphoria.  She gave me unconditional support, and names/numbers of therapists and doctors she used.  I'm seeing two of them now.

I hope you find a real friend, trans or not, to just share a coffee, look across the table and smile.  And hug genuinely, when it's time to leave.

[Veronica M]

I think there are a lot of us here going through transition that are lonely and need the interaction of others like us. I am probably one of the lucky ones as I have a pretty good support group I attend weekly. However that being said, a lot of the folks there are younger as I am in my 50's but that okay.

While I know privacy is important to a lot of us, perhaps starting a forum thread that people here can say where they are from might be in order. Just a thought... Then perhaps we could get together if we live close to each other. Given the meetings could be arranged via PM, I don't see the harm in something like that. I myself live in the San Diego CA. area, and would love to meet other girls here that are close by.

Disclaimer: As always one should be cautious as to internet meet ups so use common sense...

[Allyda]

While I know privacy is important to a lot of us, perhaps starting a forum thread that people here can say where they are from might be in order. Just a thought... Then perhaps we could get together if we live close to each other. Given the meetings could be arranged via PM, I don't see the harm in something like that. I myself live in the San Diego CA. area, and would love to meet other girls here that are close by.

Disclaimer: As always one should be cautious as to internet meet ups so use common sense...

Actually I was going to suggest the same thing Veronica. Starting a thread where TG MTF's can say where they are so we can maybe connect with others like us in our are area is great! Those that wish to post could say something like: "I'm in N/W Central Florida", and pm's could take it from there

[Sincerely Tegan]

I think there are a lot of us here going through transition that are lonely and need the interaction of others like us. I am probably one of the lucky ones as I have a pretty good support group I attend weekly. However that being said, a lot of the folks there are younger as I am in my 50's but that okay.

While I know privacy is important to a lot of us, perhaps starting a forum thread that people here can say where they are from might be in order. Just a thought... Then perhaps we could get together if we live close to each other. Given the meetings could be arranged via PM, I don't see the harm in something like that. I myself live in the San Diego CA. area, and would love to meet other girls here that are close by.

Disclaimer: As always one should be cautious as to internet meet ups so use common sense...

I like this idea. Do it.

Engage!

-Tegs