My 4 month update...
In short, life has not been about transitioning recently. Too much other stuff has been happening.
Lets see, the highlights. I
resigned! 
. My old workplace had two levels of management made of abhorrent people. Truly rotten people who are a disgrace to the species I belong to. Those such people had been trying to make my life at work hell. You can imagine why. But it was under the guise of anything but. I finally decided that resigning was in my best interests, taking stress of dealing with false accusations etc into account. For any Aussies out there who would like to know the name of said company, please PM me. I wouldn't recommend anyone working there, trans or otherwise.
Anyway, it didn't actually hit me until days after, the risk I was taking, putting my trans self at the mercy of the job market. As illegal as it is, had I been seen to be trans, or outed myself, I would not have had an easy time looking for work. In fact, my confidence came solely down to the stock I had in myself to pass as a woman. So after sending a few applications out, I began interviews the same day. And four days after resigning, I was offered a similar position for the same money, and gladly accepted.
. By god that was stressful, and such a relief to have that letter of offer in my hand.
After accepting the position, I was forced to out myself for a police check ( which requires former names ). The air with the agent felt a little tense after that, which I expected and can accept. Otherwise I had no intention of revealing my history. I hope that in time, they will realise the professional value in me as a woman. The new workplace will still remain in the dark as to my history.
In other news, I met my mother for the first time since transitioning. We'd regularly spoken on the phone for the last two years, and it has remained positive, but my mother had never met me. In short, it didn't go well. I'm sure that her condition with the onset of Alzheimers played a big part, but she was cruel. At one time in normal conversation, she says "I think that I like the old person better. I connected with him.". Pointing out that "he" would be dead if no changes were made was just dismissed. The issues continued during her stay, and she withdrew more and more. Her last words to me were "I never want to see you again. Goodbye". I think this should hurt more than it does... But it doesn't. I mean, I cried for hours and hours, but the tears were over the loss of something I never really had. Those years of memories and experiences made by "him" seem distant, not mine. To the point where my connection with my mother broke. For both of us I guess. This visit was supposed to put those pieces back together... But it didn't. Family wise, I've felt so alone since the start of transition. Seems that feeling was more representative of reality than I knew. After so many years of bending and appeasing my family, no more. Never again. The door will always be open to them, but they will have to put considerable effort in to be 'close' as they once were ( well some of my family anyway ). Something I doubt any of them will do. You know what they say... you cannot choose your family.
So other than family and employment, I've been busy refining my wardrobe and style. My new position only has a casual dress code. I had a corporate wardrobe perfected for my former job, but that will be of limited use to me now. So given the change of season too, I've been spending _way_ too much. Dresses, tops, boots, the list goes on. But I am happy with my wardrobe... it should now see me through winter. In truth, I cannot wait for it to be colder... It will be the first ever winter for the new me
. Little things like this are exciting!.
That is probably all of the major news. Otherwise I'm starting to line up things for SRS, and generally prepare myself for the rest of my first year alive
. Exciting stuff...
