Sadness

[Sarah Louise]

Jessica you didn't start anything, most of us are in support of your comments.

[Nero]

Well Jordan, you are on moderation. But I have approved this comment (can't say I'll approve any others). Whatever your feelings or opinions, you have seriously hurt at least one member here with your comments and pms.

Oh, but I don't have feelings.  I see how it works now.

You may feel justified in your envy of this person.

Clueless much?  It's never been envy.  I don't envy anyone on this forum.

These feelings are natural and I'm not condemning them. I am condemning your treatment of an innocent person -someone you have apparently deemed unworthy of support. You seriously hurt somebody here. And made them afraid to come back. Does that feel good? Being a bully? I can understand that. I didn't care how much I hurt other people - when I was 11.

Again, clueless much?    I'm no bully - never have been - never will be.
I tried to reason with that person.  I even said they looked good and 100% passable. 
They spit in my face.  And now I'm the bad person?
Do whatever you want.  Mod me, Ban me, whatever - but you can't stop me from discussing the nonsense that happens here somewhere else.

I don't know everything happened though I suppose I could get the pm records. But the bottom line is you really hurt somebody. No matter what started it or whatever. Do you care about that? You hurt somebody. A fragile young girl just starting her journey. Hurt her to the point she was afraid to come back. No matter how the argument began, you ended up seriously hurting another human being.

[JordanBlue]

Too little - Too late.  I'm not going to play the PM game with you so you have something to use against me.  I have no problem posting my thoughts right here for all the world to see.  That 'other person' disrespected me just as much as you seem to think I 'hurt her'.  I'm not digging up bones.
I'm not one to whine or complain and I'm sure not about to start doing that now.  It happened.  It's over. It's done.  I don't play games.  What I say is what I feel.  I don't ask for much - just equal treatment.  Again, Block me, Ban me, Do WHATEVER your immense power prompts you to do.  It just seems a bit odd that I'm not the only one on FB discussing the nonsense here.  and there's not much you can do about that, huh? 

[Ltl89]

Please can the fighting stop!  Look, I'm a lot of things, a screw up and many more, but I never intended for it to reach to this level.  To those who have a problem with me, that is your right, but I ask for it to at least stop.  I'm not hear to debate who is right or wrong or who has more problems in life.  Please, you don't have to like me or agree with me or like my presense here, but you can move on as I can.  There is plenty of space for the both of us.  I promise on my part not to interact with the member who detests me and ask the same.  Isn't that enough?  What more do you want from me. Please let's not fight over this.  I'm at fault for part of it and apologize and hope it will just end.  If there must be a life long grudge for that, I'm sorry.  I try to do more good here than not, but I realize I create grief and negativity and for that I'm sorry.  I hate when that happens and believe me, I kick myself harder than anyone could kick me.

Jessica,

Don't let those people get you down.  Look, you do a lot of things that are kind for the people here.  You give support in the best way you know how and you try to do good.  Maybe you don't always achieve that mark, but you try and that's what matters.  If people are going to give you a tough time on that, then that is there own problem and issue.  Seriously don't take it all to heart.  And let me say this.  I respect you.  I respect that you take time out of your day to read some one elses drama.  Maybe you really can't help all the time, but you do your best.  And you know what, this site does more harm than good.  I'll say this out loud, this site probably has saved a messed up loser like myself on more than one occassion.  How many more are out there?  For all those who complain, how many found inspiration or perhaps enough support to get by?  Many more than those who complain.   This site has given me the support I lack in real life and it's done the same for many.  It's helped many gain courage to step forward and make something of themselves and it's also helped others find enough ways to cope while they struggle to get there.  Whatever.  The site helps many people, and Jessica you are a big part of that site.  Is it flawless?  No.  ARe there problems? Sure.  But nothing in life is perfect nor are any of us as people.  Don't worry about your shortcomings and focus on your strengths and what you have to offer.  I can assure you there is much more of that.  Lastly, don't let something important to you be ruined by others.  If it means something to you and others here, then that;s what matters.  IF other's don't like it, they are free to find other avenues.

[Sarah Louise]

I agree, this is not the place to go into this. Time to end this thread.

[Nero]

Too little - Too late.  I'm not going to play the PM game with you so you have something to use against me.  I have no problem posting my thoughts right here for all the world to see.  That 'other person' disrespected me just as much as you seem to think I 'hurt her'.  I'm not digging up bones.
I'm not one to whine or complain and I'm sure not about to start doing that now.  It happened.  It's over. It's done.  I don't play games.  What I say is what I feel.  I don't ask for much - just equal treatment.  Again, Block me, Ban me, Do WHATEVER your immense power prompts you to do.  It just seems a bit odd that I'm not the only one on FB discussing the nonsense here.  and there's not much you can do about that, huh?

But you are complaining. I invited you to talk about this in private, but you don't want to do that.

And it's not odd at all that these people on facebook are complaining. I've seen the comments and know that they are mostly disgruntled staff members, banned members, and friends of the same. It's really no surprise they're unhappy. A fired staff member and their friends badmouthing the site. Okay. Not a surprise. A bit disappointing when you thought you would never encounter this kind of thing past junior high. But whatever.

[piglet smith]

Every forum I've been to in the past has had this sort of thing going on in the background, other areas and someone invariably starts another site for the disgruntled while still going to the old forum to stir the pot for their own amusement. I found it best to not get involved with other forumers too much other than the few I have grown close to and definitely not join any offshoot sites and such.

I hate that you are experiencing what you are on your own facebook, but that can happen when you throw open the gates and friend people you don't know well because at the end of the day, they are people and people can be real ->-bleeped-<-s at times.


Hopefully this will fade away and things will settle again soon.

And just so you know, I haven't had any issue with your moderating or your posts in general. I'm of the mind that when things bug me, I quietly leave and when I get over it, I come back quietly. Its how I personally deal with things.

[Charley Bea(EmeraldP)]

I have no problems with anyone personally, no one on FB, no one here and no one at the other forum(I am assuming I have the right one in mind). I joined the other forum as I was asked if I liked to and so I did not because of perceived problems here(none for me that I know of) but because I have almost no one IRL to interact with and feel there is a limited amount on offer online in terms of forums aswell. So I am on both, just as I am on that facebook group, again because I am limited as to where I can go to interact with people in the trans community. Again I have no problems with anyone here, somedays I don't feel comfortable being here but that is more my own anxiety than anything else. I often feel the same way at home, can't explain it just do. Some days things do feel hostile here and other days they don't. This happens for me at other forums aswell(not trans related), it is nothing anyone has done to make me feel uncomfortable(again that I can recall), I guess it is just a part of the being on a forum. I guess what I am getting at is not everyone involved in that discussion or others is disgruntled staff or not. In my case sometimes I feel like commenting on some discussions especially if I am in a bad place and sometimes I don't. That doesn't and shouldn't effect my overall feeling. Think of it as having a bad day at work and needing to vent and then sometimes regretting it afterwards.

If I have upset anyone I apologise, I do my best not to upset people. I guess you could say I do not like confrontation at all and would rather just get along with everyone.

[Beverly]

This thread has been a bit of an eye-opener. I found it very interesting.

[Ms Grace]

BTW Jessica, you can unfriend and block people on Facebook too, you don't have to wait for them to do it.

[Jessica Merriman]

BTW Jessica, you can unfriend and block people on Facebook too, you don't have to wait for them to do it.

Sorry Grace. I didn't know that before I posted here, I sure do now. I am still learning all about tech stuff. Us dinosaurs have a lot of catch up to do.

[helen2010]

This thread has been a bit of an eye-opener. I found it very interesting.

So did I.  Knowing how much work, energy and passion is needed to lead or moderate any community I can't imagine just how much you have given to so many of us over so many years.   You do an immense good for so many of us.  Susans is a huge part of my life and my development.  Think of the good and those that you are helping.  There will always be those who are aggrieved and unhappy, if you believe that their positions lack merit dont take on their baggage.  You are already carrying us with you.

For your efforts, good humor, guidance and caring for this community - thank you.

Aisla

[Jessica Merriman]

Thanks everyone!

[Veronica M]

Thanks everyone!

Your very welcome Sis... By the way if you ever need a computer question answered just PM me... Hate to say it but have quite the geeky side also... LOL

Hugs

[nether]

Jessica even from the moment I first started on this site, you were there to give encouragement and words of wisdom within the first 5-10 minutes of my post. The other members love and support you even if we've never met. Your hard work does not go unnoticed!

One sad truth is that we aren't always going to be accepted. Not saying that it isn't worth fighting for, but I think public displays can provide an outlet for hate quite easily.

Anyways, love you girl!
Live long and stay safe!